How do you all organise yourselves? Hints and tips would be appreciated.

[ShyBaby]

Bah. This may end up being a long post.

So.

Monday to Friday im at work. I mostly come back knackered and fed up (am in the process of looking for something less stressful with zero responsibility). I get back, go to collect the kids. They pee around for 15 mins or so. Grandad (who kindly picks them both up from school) has already fed them toast or something.

We get home. I wash up, sweep, mop, collect dirty clothes from around the house etc. I then cook tea.

Dd wont eat much apart from sausage and chips. Why I dont know because ive never cooked total crap for them. Ive tried the vegetable thing and she's having none of it, will just let me cook it, refuse to eat it and scream the place down.

Ds loves vegetables and cooked dinners but will only eat dry food. I think that may have something to do with his dyspraxia but not sure and dont want to push it when he seems to be improving so much with everything else.

I am trying to eat healthily (weightwatchers) as I need to lose some weight.

I have to cook three seperate meals so we never eat together. dd will get up and walk around the room eating hers. Every few seconds im telling her to sit down. Then ds will have his. I will probably save mine for when dd goes to bed as I wont get 5 mins to eat it anyway.

Then its check uniforms and make their dinners for the next day (mine too). It takes flipping ages.

Im lucky if I get a bath every night (I know, I know).

Saturdays we go shopping and I try to get all the things we need, then its back here and tea thing again.

Sundays I clean the house (a proper clean) because it always looks filthy by then and cook the roast while im doing it. By tea time im normally falling asleep and still haven't cleaned the whole house.

Add into that the various hobbies (karate, swimming). Bathing dd, chatting to them both about school, helping with homework. Doctors appts, dentists appts.

I know I post on here, if I didn't get any me time at all I would go insane. I could work from the minute I woke up until the early hours and there still wouldn't be enough time to get everything done.

Stupid things are getting me down. Here's an example:

I have one pair of black trousers for work, because im in between sizes due to losing weight and putting a little back on again. Some asshole at work dropped a cigarette on them (which wouldn't have happened if he'd just piss off and stop crawling all over me...does one really need to sit so close when im outside on a break ) and I need a new pair. I tried to look for a new pair today. Dd needed the toilet, twice. I know she cant help it but twice I had picked things up, had to put them down and take her to the toilet in Asda a ten min walk away. I gave up in the end. I now have nothing to wear for work apart from said pair of trousers with a piece of sticky black velcro stuck inside them, I hope noone notices. Maybe they'll do me a favour soon and fire me for having messy hair and scruffy clothes .

I cant seem to get organised and feel quite disgusted when I look in the mirror. I look knackered and a complete mess. I feel ill lots, (nothing I can put my finger on) just achey, tired and snappy. I broke a tooth several months ago and never got around to making an appointment because im always thinking about other things.

I know if I can get a little organised I can sort these things out!

Yes? (hopeful emoticon)!

Sounds a lot like my situation, except I work part time because my parents wouldn't even pick my ds up from school. To be honest my house has gone to pot and it's staying that way for the forseeable future.

Am going to give the bathroom a clean today, fling the hover over the bits of rug I can see in teh lounge and get the bed sheets washed and the rest can wait for another day. Have just ordered the bulk of shopping to be delivered tomorrow evening but will have to nip out to shops quickly to get a couple of things I can't order on there. I know what you mean about getting stuff you don't want from home shopping. I use Tesco and they have a box you can tick for no substitutes and notes. I almost always tick no substitutes and for fresh things like yoghurt I always put a note of the date it needs to be used by after (if that makes sense). If they're not good buy the bulk of your dried/tins/toiletries/cleaning products from it and get fresh items in a smaller shop. I switched to a farm shop on teh drive home from work for fruit and veg, cheaper and only takes me a couple of mins to grab what i need and carry on home.

Do your school have a breakfast club you could use to get into work early and then pop to the shops during a slightly longer lunch break or leave earlier instead to do the same? What about a holiday club you can pop them in for a few hours just to get some shopping done or to have a break during the day? If you're on WTC & CTC you should get help with childcare costs. I have taken a day off work and put ds in holiday club just to get a break on occassion. Can you afford a baby sitter occassionally. I can't but if I could I would definitely find one.

I too look a state and need a dentist appointment to fix teeth but can't afford it so ignoring. Already had my annual haircut this year so will need to wait a few more weeks till i can justify another one and i can't afford make up, wear flip flops to work as shoes are too expensive, and wear the same skirt for work day in day out. Actually I do have two different ones, a summer and a winter one... Also have to cook my ds different meals as he refuses to eat almost everything except pasta and pizza. Will give a try to the suggestions above about that but to be honest any meal that takes longer than 15 mins to prepare and cook is outside my time frame. He eats cereal for dinner when he won't eat what is given (and not chocolate/sugar cereal, weetabix, shreddies, rice krispie type cereal).

So I do know how you feel. Am in the same boat. Basically you have to let your standards slip as far as housework goes. And don't be afraid of asking friends and anyone to help with childcare. Fit things in when you can. For example we went into town on friday for a hospital appointment for ds. I took the oportunity to reserve online a couple of items from argos for xmas and went and picked them up after the appointment before we headed home. Ds stayed in the car while I nipped into the store. He asked what I bought, I simply handed him a new catalogue and said I hadn't decided yet (had already put bag in boot without him taking much notice). These are the kind of things you have to do just to get stuff done.

Oh and only wash up once a day!

And if anyone has a dishwasher going and can plumb it in for me I'd love to have one too! Might have to get rid of the fridge to fit it in though...

Be kind to yourself, take one day at a time. List out what needs doing so you don't keep forgetting (dentist, trousers etc) and then cross them off the list as you get to them and set yourself a realistic timeframe to sort them out. Things will get easier as the children get older and can be left alone for a while or in the evening. That's what I keep telling myself anyhow!

Try the online shopping again - I think its improved so much. mysupermarket.com compares all of the main ones, and shows you all their offers.

at your mother! is there another parent who perhaps you could organise playdates with? Obviously if you are working after school is not an option, but if they have particular friends you could organise something at the weekend. Its a bit of a myth that weekends are 'family time' in many two parent households IME. And having friends over to play doesn't increase the burden - they keep your children occupied freeing you up and the reward is your children go there for a couple of hours (and that's all you need to get your hair done )

I think you sound quite organised already and I take my hat off to you, as you do alot more than me and I am a sahm.

Agree that you need to schedule some time in for yourself, but otherwise you are doing fine.

I have all this to come when I start work in November, and am just hoping I manage to keep on top of it all.

i only have 1 dd who is 14months and work part time and i also feel i have not got a second to myself and feel bad for sitting chatting on mn when i should be cleaning...

sounds like you aree getting all the essentials done... but i know it is so annoying when you are tryiong tio shop alone with lo who is being demanding or needs you to do something eles...

Thanks for messages. Its been another Sunday cleaning and I still havent finished! I do tidy up in the week but on a Sunday I tear the whole house apart. The problem I have is that we have so much stuff. We have a two bedroomed house which I coverted into a three as we didn't have enough "points" for a bigger one. My bedroom was quite large so I made two out of it. (Got a builder in to do a stud wall etc) Problem is dd's bedroom is about 7ft by 7ft with a boiler cupboard built into it which I am not allowed to rip out as anything I do, I have to put back the way it was when we move out. I never expected to be here so long but dd will be five soon!

My loft hatch is tiny as this house is unmodernised and I cant get through it (am a size 12 now so not too huge). Ive gotten rid of as much as I can but you know there are some things we always keep but dont necessarily want to display? (Baby stuff, Christmas stuff blah blah ect). I cant put much in the loft so its crammed under beds and in wardrobes. Everywhere I walk im tripping over something. Its a blardy nightmare to clean around. Upstairs is a shambles, looks like a car boot! I hate clutter. I reckon if I could get that loft hatch sorted then board the whole lot out it would be a step in the right direction. It would be a doddle cleaning a house you could actually move around.

I havent done my ironing yet either. Have various bits of uniform hanging all over the living room. I dont even want to look at it. Sandwiches to make, trousers to mend (lol)...arrggghhh where do I start!?

Ooh illegally, you start work in November? What doing? Havent seen your threads recently.

Shybaby - sounds like you are doing an amazing job. It's not easy being a single parent and I don't know how you manage to fit in full-time work, with very little other support. Well done!

You do need some time to yourself occassionally. I work part-time, and find that's plenty. Could you arrange to reduce your hours slightly, maybe finish a couple of hours earlier one afternoon a week to give you some time? Remember, you need to look after yourself as well as your children and home.

Take care. x

I really wish I could reduce my hours. I used to do 16 hours a week which was great because I could keep on top of everything. The council screwed up my housing benefit claim unfortunately which contributed to a few other things that went wrong and I ended up owing a lot of money that I couldnt pay. I had to take out a loan which I have 5 years left on. I cant afford to work part time now

Yep, have got a job as a maternity care assitant at the local hospital.

Not 100% sure of start date yet as they don't seem to rush themselves.

Thats awful that you had to get a loan cos the messed up your HB.

I am dreading them messing up something with me.