Mckensie Friend called said I was abusive

[Janiestar75]

I made the mistake of paying a Mckensie friend for legal 'support' in a case my ex has brought against me because my 12 year old doesn't want to go to contact. Within the first few minutes of the conversation, I said 'I'm finding you a bit abrupt'. He said I was being 'rude', that he didn't have to take this 'abuse' and that I was in 'grave danger of losing my daughter'. Now I have to wait until at least Monday (and probably after Xmas) for proper legal advice... just hearing those words freaked me out... even though I don't think it's true, especially as he knew very little about the case at that point.

From experience, The few McKenzie Friends I have come across were scorned fathers who had learned every in, out and loop hole of the court system in order to screw their ex wives and make them self look like martyrs.

They were all heavily biased towards fathers and one even suggested twisting some "evidence" he believed he had found amongst documents my husband shared with him in order to make an innocent situation look like something it wasn't. My husband, as much as he wanted help sorting out a situation with his DDs (the whole reason we were in contact with the McKenzie friends), told him where to go. It all seemed very underhand and my husband was not comfortable with the way he was suggesting to go about things

MacKenzie Friends started as unpaid volunteers. Some still are.

The paid ones market themselves as ‘you don’t have to pay extortionate lawyers fees’ and fail to mention that they can charge less because they are often unqualified and uninsured. There may be some good paid MacKenzie Friends but there are an awful lot of bad ones.

You can do small claims without a lawyer, although sounds like he'd be painful.to face. Given all he's said and the others involved I'd call 101 and talk to the police, he's a scammer who is risking the safety of vulnerable parents and children, he's dangerous as well as dodgy.

Why on Earth would anyone pay someone who isn't a lawyer to help them with a legal case?
Don't do this people!

You can't breach your own confidentiality! You and your DD are client and he is (allegedly) the professional. He has no confidentiality. I think its disgusting that the organisation emailed him to tell him you have contacted them. I would escalate that to a complaint TBH given what they know about him. If you want an advocate for your DD then counsellors for children are much better at gaining info on wishes and writing a professional report about any harm caused and DDs reasons for wanting less contact.

I could tell from your first post that this man was probably involved in fathers for justice. You see a lot of them in the family court system

It is correct that if a resident parent continually frustrates contact with the other parent for no good reason then the child can be moved to live with the non-resident parent. Have a look at 'parental alienation'. However, I'm not sure how that works with older children who can express themselves.

Agree with others. Report to the police, including screenshots of his unsolicited texts. If he continues to contact you write a short response explaining you don't want any contact. Get some advice from CAB or a reputable source or read it yourself if possible. Sorry you've experienced this

I'll give it a go. I think I have evidence, in his emails and voicemail. Thanks!

I didn't know you pay for MacKenzie Friends. And I also thought they were women. Because I want to court twice and my Women's Aid support worker told me about it

Friend had one to accompany her to a court case to do with her divorce to try and save money. A barrister with proper legal training was costing her a huge amount and didn’t seem to take the time to explain what was going on (friend had a brain injury caused by her ex so needs someone to explain what was going on in language she understood)

The Mackenzie Friend she had explained everything in layman’s terms and actually listened to her.
I think the fact his day to day job was that of a counsellor helped
Couldn’t have been more different to Janiestar’s experience

I think originally the idea was that they wouldn’t be paid. As with many things, well intentioned but over time an industry has grown up around them exploiting loopholes in regulation.

McKenzie friends tend yo be closely aligned with MRA/F4J type organisations.
Avoid and stick to proper legal advice.