How do you celebrate your birthday as a single mum?...

[lastnicknamefree]

...or do you just not bother?
I have a choice of either just completely not bothering and treating it like a normal day or organising my own fun type day by maybe taking the kids out for a meal I can't afford etc. I feel totally miserable about it really.
I miss having a husband or OH to buy me flowers or get the kids to make cards and bring me badly made breakfast in bed etc!
As a single mum, how do you spend your birthdays to make it a different type of day or do you not bother either?

This thread is just so sad

When it was just me, my brother and my mum we always celebrated her birthday, always a cake and a paper table cloth. Me & my brother used to club our pennies together and buy her a fabulous very shit elephant (she mentioned once she quite liked elephants... I have a lot of penguins)

I think you need to just make it happen, it's rubbish you have to do this but maybe they will get the hint - I always make a massive fuss of my mum on her birthday, but it started with her just going for it as we were too small to do the work in making it happen.

But I can relate a little to how some of you must feel with not bothering via DP, he was a RP single dad when I met him and he also never really celebrated his birthday when it was him and DC, as he said he couldn't see the point, he really didn't like birthdays for him before i met him - he loves them now.

Get yourself a cake, a paper table cloth and make or buy some hats - hopefully they will cotton on that mums deserve some love on their birthdays.

Penguins nice idea but when every penny counts the kids have to come first.

Sorry that sounded harsh just this time of year. I have to say to my lad today that we would celebrate his birthday, maybe have Xmas in Febuary and I'd have a half birthday in June. This year is just harder than ever as he went to secondary school so had to save for uniform which lowered Xmas savings, he then managed to break his heel so 3 weeks of taxis to and from school wiped out Xmas savings. Am up at this time worrying about how the he'll I'm going to manage to do it this year.

nix I'm so sorry it's so hard for you, I find it heartbreaking.

I can only understand second hand how hard it must be I watched my mum struggle so much, I am so grateful for what she did for me and my brother in the absence of my useless father.

We made paper hats out of bits of paper and mum made her cake. I just hope you find someway to celebrate just to have a bit of rest bite from what sounds such a hard place that your in.

Q

Penguin the fact that you love and appreciate what your mum did made me cry. The close relationship I have with my lad, the times that he says I'm his hero at school. The kisses and I love you mum are worth a million birthday celebrations x Thank you for reminding me of that

Bless your heart

I really do appreciate what my mum did for us and all the things she went without for us, very much so. I remember so many happy things from my childhood and none of them involved fancy things, I just remember my mum always being there for us.

I really hope you find someway to celebrate your birthday, you deserve it and sounds to me like you have a lovely son :)

I think the key to a happy birthday is to let go of expectations and spoil yourself as if it were someone else. I always bake myself a cake/buy one (depending on time and energy) and put today a birthday tea. I also decorate the room for myself the night before and ask my boy to put the presents out for me (always biy and wrap mysef something small like a nail polish/new shampoo - a posher brand than would usually get). I also go to a section in a shop and say choose me some flowers up to £5. Then they are for him! You've got to love yourself and by doing that, your kids will learn to self care for themselves in years to come should they fall upon difficult times.

As for those lucky ones with big families and bottomless pits of money being taken out for dinner and treated all year round. Yes, of course I'd love all that but I do wonder if you have everything so easy all the time, whether you truly appreciate it.

In a way, having to struggle a bit helps you see the joy in the ordinary and appreciate the little things.

excuse many typos. must proof read before posting. have hair dye on so in hurry.

Birthday was end of October. Took them to soft play and got a takeaway. No longer bothered about birthdaysome. Just getting old.

It depends how you feel about it, mine was in June I just treated it like a normal day. As otherwise I think your setting yourself up for disappointment.

I used to buy myself a lovely present spend what you would on a partner and try to either have friends over or get a sitter and go out. I've spent a few on my own you do get used to it.

I had a couple of really miserable birthdays towards the end of my marriage where ex didn't get me anything from himself or the kids. The final year they were old enough to realise and it was hard for them and me. Now that I'm single, I make sure we celebrate. I make a cake, throw an afternoon tea party with my friends on a 'bring a plate' basis so I am not stressed catering for everyone, I give DD money to go shopping for a present for me in a local independent homeware / gift shop with a helpful owner, and am duly surprised and delighted by whatever she gets (she's only 6... It's been a genuine surprise to see what she gets me!)

I also buy myself something as a 'treat' that I wouldn't normally splurge on.

I really enjoy my birthday now, for the first time in years.

We all baked shortbread and dipped it in raspberry yoghurt. My DC are 4 & 5 and we loved it, sat covered in flour licking our lips next to the oven :)
I got a cheap bottle of wine for when they went to bed.
Lovely memories.

I usually make/buy a cake and let the DC decorate it. I also give them.money to 'secretly' choose me something in Tesco, usually a toblerone or something.

Last year on mothers day I bought some croissants, nice juice etc, left them out at eye level on the worktop with a conveniently placed tray and suggested to the DC (8 and 6) that they bring me breakfast in bed they were very pleased with themselves! Looking forward to when they're old enough to make me a cup of tea...

Mine is in a few weeks time, on Saturday I'm planning to bake my birthday cake with my eldest DD (age 9) and then my sister said she will come over with her children for a birthday takeaway.

On Sunday my 3 DDs and I will go to the cinema to watch Fantastic Beasts. I'm really looking forward to it. My ExH hardly ever did anything for my birthday, so this is actually really nice to make my own fuss over me.

It's definitely hard as a single parent but I was to create happy joyful memories for the children and I want to feel like I am worth something too.

I'm not really a birthday person, maybe that helps.

But this year I booked the day off work and got a groupon voucher for a facial for myself and then I cooked turkey drummers and baked beans for tea and drank cherryade because that's what I fancied.

My brother sent me a present, that was the only present I got and I never thought it was sad until someone mentioned it. But I'm not really a birthday celebration person so I didn't mind