Is Teddington too posh for us?

[PrincessBananaH]

Love the area and we are considering relocating there. We have 1 DD who will start primary next year.
our budget will only stretch to a nice 2 bed flat or maisonette there, are we going to feel a bit out of place? It seems to be a really expensive area but we love it so much and has good schools and transports.
Anyone familiar with it ho can help?

Please don't fall into the trap of stereotyping the UK like this. It is no different to any other country on earth - some people are snobby and like to hang out with people who are similar to them and some people are more inclusive with their friendship groups.

London is way more diverse and inclusive than other places I've lived.

Parts of London aren’t that diverse particularly socioeconomically & many areas have gentrified & changed enormously. As a 2nd gen immigrant there are definitely more class hang ups here imo.

@wildebees I think the class division is just more visible here in the UK. Of course differences in income exist everywhere but back in my home country and I dare say across most European countries, the division isn't as extreme. You don't easily go from private streets with 5 bed mansions in them to modest LA flats behind the corner. It is very much the norm here and it creates division

"You don't easily go from private streets with 5 bed mansions in them to modest LA flats behind the corner. It is very much the norm here and it creates division"

I've certainly lived in other countries where the rich and poor are more segregated, so it is possible to live day to day without meeting people from different backgrounds. I think that living cheek-by-jowl with people from different backgrounds is a good thing. It doesn't "create" division. It just reminds people that not everyone is the same, whether they like it or not. People sometimes don't get along, but that can happen anywhere for any reason.

Inverted snobbery is as bad as traditional snobbery.

Of course class division is more visible here.

Class division is what the UK does best, and has been the backbone of our society since before the mediaeval days!

Wake up! It's nothing new, and won't change anytime soon either.

Having never heard of the area, I thought this was going to be an out-there baby names thread!

I live in what must be the cheapest house in Teddington, and I am a lesbian single parent who grew up myself in a council flat and has mixed race kids. We all love living in Teddington.

It IS quite posh, it's an expensive area because the schools are good and the crime rates low. But the housing stock is pretty modest so you're not surrounded by mansions. Lots of people live in flats.

It's an interesting thing, this finding a community that reflects and accepts you. I don't think I've ever had that, having lived my life in London. I don't know if it's even possible as our families are not homogenous stereotypes and neither are our communities. It's more: can I find my tribe here? I have made some really lovely friends here.

Interestingly, though both my kids went to the same state school, their friendship groups couldn't be more different. One is with a group of polite hard working girls who crochet and are going to top unis. The other hangs out with roadmen and is mates with every troubled kid in a two mile radius. So there really is something for everyone here!

Of course you will outgrow it

😂

@crampycrumpet why do you assume that? back in my home country it is the norm for all families to live in a 2 bed flat, as long as it's spacious. I only have 1 DC, how is a spacious 2 bed flat worse than a tiny 2 bed house?

More visible than where? I'd love to know where these mythical places are where there is no gap between rich and poor. Wealth inequality in the UK is actually at the lower end of the scale: https://worldpopulationreview.com/country-rankings/wealth-inequality-by-country

If it's visible in London, it's because we're crowded together into a small space and because planning controls and political policies mean that cheaper houses are often built next to more expensive houses.

I used to live in North Sydney and had friends in several Sydney suburbs that were populated by the professional classes. They were a similar demographic to Teddington. A local friend once told me she thought there was a class divide in the UK. I asked her why and she described some UK council estates she had seen. I asked her how that was different to Sydney's Western suburbs or some of the outer areas where there is a higher aboriginal population, and she said something along the lines of "yes, but that's different". She meant it wasn't as visible because it was out of sight, not because the differences weren't there!

A bit more critical thinking is needed.

There arent many spacious flats in London though. Maybe in Europe!

Trust me, think longer term. Think practically

As children grow, they take up space. They want bikes, scooters, barbie houses . Friends over to play. When they're teenagers, they wont want to hang out with you on the sofa

I have one 6 year old who is slow taking over

@crampycrumpet of course more space is always needed but unless we move much further out (which we don’t want to) or win the lottery, a 2 bed is what our budget gets us in the areas we like so it’s always going to be a compromise.

Ok, good luck with the search x

@wildebees I used to live in North Sydney and had friends in several Sydney suburbs that were populated by the professional classes. They were a similar demographic to Teddington. A local friend once told me she thought there was a class divide in the UK. I asked her why and she described some UK council estates she had seen. I asked her how that was different to Sydney's Western suburbs or some of the outer areas where there is a higher aboriginal population, and she said something along the lines of "yes, but that's different". She meant it wasn't as visible because it was out of sight, not because the differences weren't there!

A bit more critical thinking is needed.

The difference is that in the UK people are concerned about the minutiae in the small discrepancies between groups of people.

It's not just professionals v aborigines. Its professionals from public schools, professionals who where individuals who 'done good' who had come from a council estate, upper middle, middle and lower middle classes, working class, wealthy working class, chavs, benefits class, gentlemen farmers as opposed to dirt toiling farmers, new money, footballers type money, tech entrepreneur type money, oligarch type rich.
Just so many teeny tiny differences but oh boy do they matter here. People sneering at each other.

Australia is not like this

If you can afford a nice flat there I think you would fit in fine - it's not posh in the way that Hampstead or the nicer parts of Richmond are.

But my god it feels like a day's journey to get out there.

@boopboopbidoop"Australia is not like this"

Yes it is. Everywhere is like this. The word "class" may have been invented in England, but the concept exists everywhere. Some people sneer at each other. Some people don't. Countries like Australia and America may have a "younger" culture, where a higher proportion of people can trace their origins back to immigration and consider themselves or their forbears "self made", but they still make judgements about each other based on perceived differences.

Yes it is. Everywhere is like this. The word "class" may have been invented in England, but the concept exists everywhere. Some people sneer at each other. Some people don't. Countries like Australia and America may have a "younger" culture, where a higher proportion of people can trace their origins back to immigration and consider themselves "self made", but they still make judgements about each other based on perceived differences.

I disagree. Of course everywhere people make judgements based on differences. But when people talk about the class system here they are referring to having a monarchy and an aristocracy still owning much of the land the Conqueror gave them. Or having people from public schools over represented in the gov or law. Or the inequality of income & wealth compared to other developed countries.

https://ifs.org.uk/articles/income-and-wealth-inequality-explained-5-charts

I worked there in my teens, my mother worked for an engineering firm in her working life and we both think Teddington is pretty posh. My dd goes to nursery there , it's on a wide tree lined road , independently restaurants, by a river, very good schools etc. But its right that there are loads of flats , period properties etc.

@wildebees many places in Europe are way less concerned about classes than the UK. I am
not referring to America as that’s even worse than the UK

Which places?

"Of course everywhere people make judgements based on differences. But when people talk about the class system here they are referring to having a monarchy and an aristocracy still owning much of the land the Conqueror gave them. Or having people from public schools over represented in the gov or law. Or the inequality of income & wealth compared to other developed countries."

@fonfusedm If that's what the pp's were talking about I wouldn't have objected, but that isn't what they were talking about. They were talking about wealthy people in big houses living round the corner from less wealthy people in small flats. That is nothing to do with any class system. Often the owner of the 5 bedroom house will be a builder or a plumber with his/her own business, and the owner/renter of the flat will be a teacher or an accountant, or one half of a divorced couple who used to live in one of 5-bedroom houses round the corner.

I just thought they were talking about the class system which is what my points were about 🤷🏻‍♀️

@Suburbianlife it’s so shitty that your child has had to deal with racism at school, I’m sorry.

In terms of the cliqueyness discussion, some primary playgrounds in Tedd have a reputation for being much, much less friendly than others. Ours has been exceptionally welcoming and is genuinely fairly diverse by every measure, which isn’t true for all local schools.

Thank you.

There are some really lovely parents also, just quite a lot of the more snobby ones.

It’s a shame as my child is very lovely, friendly, inclusive and happy. I have thought of moving schools, but as you say Teddington is known for this!

I have had meetings with the school regarding this but not much has been done, they have accepted it’s a problem within their school and the older years have been making a lot of racist comments which indicates it comes from the parents to be honest.

It does seem like these type of parents do not want their children to “catch” blackness in terms of culture or whatever. However, again, although this is a problem for every not so nice parent there is a lovely one who doesn’t think like this at all!