Moving to New York city.

[Howtohideasausage]

There’s potential for me, my partner and three primary age children to move to NY, would probably be the end of this year.

I have been to NYC, but as a tourist and I don’t really know the areas that well. People we know who live there say rent is very high (we have a house in London we can rent out) and that schools are variable.
We won’t be using private schools.

Are there areas people can recommend? I don’t know exact budget, but we would want three bedrooms.

Are public schools generally ok? Or is it dependant on area?

Thanks.

Echoing previous posters, you'd need a significant uplift in your salary for the same lifestyle in NYC.

I wouldn't live in NYC. It's probably ok for a young couple but for a young family I'd seriously reconsider. Friends I know who work in Manhattan all commute in from New Jersey.

No way I'd move my kids to there, it's a dump and very unsafe.

Do you have to move..?

I love the ignorance. New York City is very safe, actually. Newspapers love screaming about crime, but the stats don't bear it out. The NYPD and its unions also haw a nasty habit of lying because it opposes changes to policy.

it's not exceptionally clean, but big cities generally aren't. London has suffered in many ways in the past 20+ years, too.

I'm not a fan of allt the changes to New York in recent years, but it's still a great city with tons to do.

the Hudson Valley is very, very pretty but it's not cheap. People have been moving further up. Do be aware that in some of the prettier suburbs it's very difficult to secure a rental--towns discourage building rental housing and you have to hope for a house to come on the market. Westchester has a reputation for being whiter and WASPier. New Jersey is more diverse and has more variety of places to live in my opinion. (Long Island is difficult for rentals and not so convenient.)

Yes we are married.

No, we don’t have to move, we want to. Nothing is set, my husband has asked his company to move him to the NY office as we want to live there for a few years.

There’s a lot to think about; thanks for the advice.

I wouldn't think twice. It's my favourite city. I was there last year and still love it despite everything. It's expensive (for everything) so it a lot would depend on your salary and benefits package.

Seeing the skyline each day alone would be enough for me

Agree! I lived close to NYC for a few years and lived every minute of my time in the city. Greatest city in the world!

Some thoughts I forgot to add - you're not likely to be able to afford Manhattan or the more expensive parts of Brooklyn unless you want to cram into a 2 bedroom. So your decision should factor in what kind of lifestyle you want. If this is about an NYC dream, you're unlikely to live it. Would you be happy living in the suburbs? There's certainly many different ways to do that, and different features of the various suburban areas. But realistically that's what it would be. It's not a bad thing necessarily and there's other nice aspects to not living in the city proper. For example on Long Island and in NJ there's the water and the beach (and the beaches really are lovely in summer) whereas up in the Hudson Valley you've got loads of parks and the Catskills and it's great for outdoors activities. But it's a very different life, more car use for example. If you pick the right suburb you can manage on one car.

It all depends on the salary offer too. If you were single, or a couple with no kids, then living on a budget so you could experience something different would be an easy call. But it's another story with 3 small children.

You will find, when you get here, that your DH will be grossly underpaid compared to his local peers if he comes on a temporary expat package (especially one that he requested, that isn’t business driven).

Honestly - seriously - he would do better to be a local hire. That is, have the bank resign him as a UK employee and re-employ him as a US employee on a local package. They should also do the visa paperwork. The new packer will have a (much much higher) local salary, and benefits package. You will struggle on a UK salary + small uplift. Everything will be foreign to you, three kids not necessarily in the same school, largely absent DH (long hours plus commute).

If you do get a good enough package, you will have plenty of options. Queens and LIC are areas where you will live always looking to Brooklyn and Manhattan. Try somewhere like Hoboken: commutable, good for weekends in the city, but a little town in and of itself with decent schools and a Clapham-style feel. Nappy valley central. Housing much more affordable too.

It can be done, but it will be work and you’ll take time settling in. I wouldn’t even consider it for less than three years, given the number of DC you have.

Hi OP. I literally just moved. We’re only planning on staying until September. Happy to keep you in the loop about how our move goes!

I will say I disagree with some of the above. I do not find it more expensive than London bar a few things. Coffee for instance and our food shop if a little more expensive. I think this is more indicative of how much more expensive London has gotten and the area in London we live in (Notting hill)

The one thing that I do think is noticeably more expensive is coffee. I think eating out is cheaper and take away is dirt cheap.

The package my partner got was a 30% uplift of his basic and they are paying for our apartment (9k). As amazing as the package sounds, it would be better to get a local job as the total package would be better.

Any question about getting things ready for moving please ask (as well as getting your house ready to rent which has been a huge learning curve)

I wouldn't do what @Partyandbullshit suggests without doing a lot of research and talking to an immigration attorney. As a local hire, your husband might not be eligible for a work transfer visa, which I think is called L1. It would likely be an H1b which, unlike the L1, doesn't allow the trailing spouse to work. Also, he might lose his UK vacation allowance. In the US many new hires only get 2 weeks! Another issue is cost of healthcare - premiums, co-pays, deductible - it's a minefield.

My main concern would be salary, we live in an expensive west coast city, have a household income of 2x yours, relatively inexpensive and excellent healthcare benefits and while we are comfortable, we are not rolling in money by any means. Our housing costs are $3k/month and would be close to double if we were renting, we have a huge amount of equity so comparatively small mortgage. Unless your DH is going to earn a minimum 2x what he’s on, you may find it tough.

Afterschool/wrap around care here is about $600/month per child for the cheap option. Healthcare premiums for a family are going to come out around $400-$600/ month depending on how good the insurance is. We only pay $15 to visit the Dr but I’ve had my insurance called unicorn insurance multiple times because it’s so good.

We aren’t super careful about how we should but don’t buy a lot of treats and spend around $1000/month on groceries for 3+ 2 cats. An Indian takeaway is going to be $70 for the three of us if we don’t pay for it to be delivered.

There are fewer cheap kids clothing brands. As PP said, a lot of kids will do activities (gymnastics, music, swimming), around here, all of these will be $150/month per child. I would expect NYC to be worse.

We were there last year, also SFO and LA. The USA has changed a lot since I was last there 25 years ago. Much dirtier and even more homeless people on the streets.

My teen DCs were excited to go and whilst we enjoyed our holiday, for them it's was if the scales had fallen from their eyes and the USA we saw is not the USA they see on Netflix etc.

It's also very expensive. I remember things being half the price of the UK but now it's at least 50% more expensive.

It's not a place I'd choose to go with DCs unless there was a very compelling reason.

Do you want to live in the city or do you want a house and a garden and more of a suburban lifestyle? A three or four bed house or apartment in a decent area of Manhattan or Brooklyn will be very expensive, but if this will be a corporate move and your DH is going to be paid a high salary I'm sure a relocation consultant will be part of the package and will help you find an appropriate home/neighbourhood/schools - if so this will take a load of responsibility off you and will be massively helpful. If your DH will not be on more of a middling sort of salary and you won't get any help with your move then I'd forget living in either of those areas and focus on towns within easy commuting distance in CT, upstate NY or NJ.

Just seen your update and your DH's salary is £120k - that's not the sort of salary you'll need to live in Manhattan or Brooklyn and afford a nice, three-bed place in a decent area. Sorry! Also, if this is just you wanting to move - why? The cost of living in the NYC area is astronomical and the price of groceries has gone up loads int he past two years. We were there at Christmas and couldn't believe how much things had gone up in the 18 months since our last visit. I wouldn't be choosing to move there atm on a middling salary like your DH's. If he was making £500k then fine, but with five people to support and you very unlikely to get a work visa if he's asking for intra-company transfer it doesn't make financial sense at all.

Try somewhere like Hoboken: commutable, good for weekends in the city, but a little town in and of itself with decent schools.

The schools in Hoboken are okay at elementary level, terrible afterwards - so depends on age of DC.

Frankly £120k is too low a salary to support 5 people living in New York unless you are willing to make very serious compromises on housing and lifestyle. And that would be unfair on the children really. This is a move that should have been done pre-children really.

OP I know you say he'll get a bit of a salary bump but it needs to be a huge bump to make this workable. And given that he's the one asking for a transfer rather than his employer having a genuine business need, that doesn't sound likely.

My English expat colleagues all commute in from Connecticut. Native NYer friends used to live in Brooklyn pre-kids but moved out to Staten Island to get more space once they had children and get the express bus into Manhattan for work. Other friends also left Brooklyn and moved up to the Hudson Valley and work locally now.

In your position, I'd look at the Hudson Valley as a previous poster suggested. I would happily live somewhere like Cold Spring (it's so beautiful!) but if it's the "living in NYC" experience that you want, that probably isn't going to satisfy. Realistically though, you won't have the income to support 5 people living in the city.

OP, would they transfer him over on a L1 visa? If so you’ll be able to work on a L2 (dependent visa). How much could you bring in?

I think the salary is just one thing to consider regarding finances. When we moved there on an inter company transfer expat basis DH stayed on his U.K. salary but we were given a very generous housing allowance plus utilities and car allowance so the numbers added up just fine regardless of the salary being low by US standards.

Just to correct this - an inter company transfer will be an L1 visa so the spouse would get an L2 so can easily apply for a work permit.

I'm a Brit married to an American. I've been in NYC for 9 years now, live and work in Manhattan and have a 3.5 year old - so just done our first school applications - and another one on the way. I could write reams on living/working/parenting in NYC, but to be really helpful would probably need to know some things that you may not be comfortable putting on the internet.

1. General rule of thumb is not to even attempt kids in Manhattan on under $200k.

2. To get an idea of Manhattan/Queens/Brooklyn/Bronx rent costs, you want Streeteasy. Difficult to recommend areas without having an idea of what you have to spend on rent. No point in saying Tribeca if you don't have $10k a month lying around for a 3 bed.

3. That being said, areas I'd recommend in the city:
   Manhattan - UES, UWS, Battery Park City, Tribeca, West Village, Greenwich Village
   Brooklyn - Park Slope, Brooklyn Heights, Greenpoint, Carroll Gardens, Fort Greene
   Queens - Long Island City, Astoria, Forest Hills Gardens
   Bronx - Riverdale - particularly Spuyten Duyvil.
   Staten Island - Hahaha don't even think about it.

4. For the suburbs you want Zillow. Again, hard to recommend a suburb unless you're willing to share the cross streets of the office (ie. 45th and 7th or 35th and 10th.) - suggestions for where to commute from vary depending on where your office is. ie, if your office is at Columbus Circle, it would be less of a schlep from Westchester than Long Island. Likewise if you're working at Hudson Yards, you want New Jersey, not Connecticut.

5. I've only ever been a parent here, but from what I gather, extra curriculars are expensive. 13 classes of pre-school gymnastics cost me $670 and that's about the standard price. Swimming was $240 for 8 sessions and that was cheap - most of my friends are paying $50 a session.

Happy to answer any more specific questions you may have, or feel free to PM me. Also worth joining the British Mums NYC Facebook group - they always have great advice and intel.

For what it's worth I LOVE living here and raising DS in Manhattan. I honestly can't imagine living anywhere else at this point.

@tilestoclean As they are requesting the move she they won't get an expat package so no housing allowance etc.

Not necessarily! We asked for an overseas move and have been on an expat contract ever since!

What age are your children? This advice is not necessarily true. Can you give some ideas of budget? The upper east side has a lot of families, good schools, and is less expensive than other parts of Manhattan. There are other neighborhoods in queens and Brooklyn too, but the ages of your children, bushy, and preferred lifestyle matters.

It’s really not any of these things, but it is different and OP will need a lot more than 120 for a comfortable lifestyle.