Moving to LA with 3 kids in July

[acapulco]

It’s not the ideal time to be moving anywhere but here we are. My partners job is relocating to the office in Hollywood. We’re in the process of applying for an L1 Visa and realistically we should be moving by July.

It’s my job to scope the cost of moving and setting up life in LA. I was hoping someone on here could offer all the insights and advice they have and anything I should be aware of and consider. We won’t have credit history obviously and will be renting.

For various reasons we’d like to be living within easyish reach of Marina Del Rey but not live in that actual location. We have drawn a curve around potential places and high schools that could work - so Venice, El Segundo, towards Manhattan Beach (I think this is too far to commute to Hollywood daily?).

We have 2 boys 16yr, 13yrs and a toddler. Obviously we need to make it work for the 16yr old on every level. Particularly school wise.

What is it that can tell me that I should aware of or be thinking about? It’s all slightly daunting when we can’t travel to scope everything out properly. That said we have travelled to LA a few times and travelled around so understand the geography but not practicalities.

I wouldn’t assume you’re too late for a boarding place in the Uk, this year more than any year things will be up in the air, especially for international applicants. I would have thought chances are good for finding a place.

@BackToWhereItAllBegan sorry I missed your post. You didn’t sound harsh. Everything you’ve said is everything I’ve been reading. It isn’t an obvious transition point. I guess at this stage timescales of being given the visa will dictate what happens. If, like a pp said, it may take 12 months then clearly we’d have to postpone the move by 18 months so he can do his Alevels.

@Clymene no your honesty is appreciated! All the different comments will prompt the right discussions.

I agree with those who suggest boarding here for your eldest. You've extenuating circumstances with your move, so just contact a range of schools (especially those with good rowing clubs!), explain your situation and enquire what is possible. Some will turn you down politely, others will say, this is what we need you to do next to apply. Many of these schools will also be familiar with US college applications so your son would have support towards both UK and US options for university.

And agree, look at state boarding schools also. They are certainly designed for families in your position.

The scope for UK-US school transitions to go wrong is broad. My cousin moved when his older two were about 7 and 10 I think. Not appreciating the full significance of the age differences, both were put into higher years at school based on how long they'd already done in school in the UK. The eldest got through ok ish. The next one down did really well in school, had a good college offer - then they noticed he was "too young" to be finishing school and asked for school confirmation that he'd met graduation requirements, by a deadline he couldn't meet as it was already summer holidays, so he couldn't go to college. Long story short his tertiary education ended up severely compromised.

I also live on the Westside of LA in an area called Mar Vista that might fit your requirements - it’s not as expensive as MDR/SM/Venice but is on the “right” side of the 405 for you to ferry DC to rowing and rugby without being so close to the ocean you are permanently stuck in traffic looking for parking. Venice HS as previously mentioned has had an injection of cash and is doing better and better every year (though I would suggest this for thinking ahead for your 13yr old, not going into any American HS for the 16yr old) and there are a handful of decent MS in the area - Mark Twain is one that feeds into Venice and is a neighbourhood school that used to be terrible but has improved 1000 fold over the last few years. There are also various charter schools you can apply to, deadlines coming up very soon but as it wouldn’t be a normal transfer you’d prob just have to call them up and find out who has space once you know when you’re coming - look at New West, City Charter, Community Charter. Also look at LACES (you’d also have to live in the area for this or permit in but it’s much further east and north) as it’s more academic than a lot of places. There are several very fancy private schools on the Westside to consider for your 13yr old too: Windward, Wildwood, Crossroads and New Roads.

In terms of cost, a nice 4 bed single family home (detached house) in Mar Vista will set you back $6-10K a month. A lot more the further west you go but then you can get cheaper if you live in an apartment.

You’ll need two cars so factor that in - electric cars are actually great in LA because of the traffic and charging points everywhere, your DH will need a car for work unless he joins a rideshare and no way can you (assuming you won’t be working otherwise whoever will be managing your DC after school) can ferry kids from SM to MDR otherwise. But a good reason for at least one of them to be in walking or biking distance of school.

To give you some other ideas of costs so you can figure out how much he needs to negotiate - a salary of $200K/yr to live comfortably on the Westside is necessary especially if you want to make trips home, you can ask for those to be paid but I think most companies stopped doing that a while ago - doesn’t hurt to ask. His company should pay all patriation costs (they may well give you a budget) so you may as well ship everything over. And make sure medical care is excellent - you went the option to have HMO or PPO with Kaiser or Anthem Blue Cross as a starting point. Also check dental coverage, even the best plans only cover $2K at the most per family member per year.

The company should also pay for 60-90days rent (and organise putting you into a serviced apartment) when you arrive and cover the cost of a hire car while you find your feet, both these are pretty standard. And yes be guarantors on rental property after that. You will have to pay double down payment so be prepare for that - DH’s work gave him in advance so we could do this.

Luckily you can work on an L2 but you still need to apply for a work permit and SSN and it’s worth asking the company if after a certain amount of time they will sort out green cards for all of you, just gives you a huge amount of security.

Trying to think of other costs for you - groceries are much more expensive than the U.K., every after school activity is more expensive, and travel home is obviously a big budget item. Even phone contracts cost more than the U.K. but you don’t pay council tax (instead property owners have to pay property tax) and every school does major fundraising so budget roughly $1500/yr per child in public schools.

PM if you need any more help with budget/contract negotiation questions. Life here can be great but miserable if you have to scrimp and save especially if that means not being able to visit home or pay out of pocket for healthcare.

Just a note of caution - I would be very surprised if you’re here by the summer, all visa were suspended for ages and now there’s a backlog and it takes longer at the best of times without covid, just don’t pin your hopes on it happening quickly. At least it’s an L1, a H1B you’d be sitting on at least 12-18months

Also finally look into Redondo School district, I believe they have the IB and I think a school in Los Feliz does too - which could be an option if your DH was able to take DS to and from school every day. There is no way in hell you want to go from west to east twice a day for pick ups and drop offs!

Oh and if you come here and the travel ban is still in place, your family won’t be able to visit and you can’t go home and come back again unless you spend 15days in Mexico in between....just worth considering.

Thanks for all your replies and thank you @LALALife for the practical financial info and much more. I’ll need to think this week when I get moment. See what transpires from other conversations being had.

I just don’t think boarding school will work financially when we’ll be paying much higher rents etc and you include flights etc.

But yes I’ll start working through this info more.

My husband is American. There is zero way I'd move a 16-year-old there. Or any high school aged child.

You shouldn't be paying the boarding fees, his employer should. Fees are fairly standard as part of a relo package for a senior position. No one is going to expect you to plonk a 16 year into US high school. I'd negotiate hard for fees for both of your older children. Otherwise it would be a hard no from me.

What does your 16 year old think about the move?

Even in the 70s when relocation packages were crap, companies paid private international school fees locally or boarding fees in the home country. If you aren't being offered this, I really wouldn't go.

Relocation packages actually rarely cover school fees anymore but I think this is extenuating circumstances - if you and your 16yr old decide this is what the best option is then yes I would push for it too.

Rents are expensive but your DH’s salary should reflect this - it’s why salaries in the Bay Area are so high, because otherwise it’s impossible to live there.

What area of work is your DH in?

@acapulco I also just wanted to say along all the doom and gloom (and there is a lot for you to consider) that it is a great place to live and great for children - we go to the beach all the time, the weather this week is in the 16-22 degrees range, there are mountains and deserts within 2 hours, people are friendly and welcoming, the food is amazing, there is loads of culture (museums, galleries, underground performance scene if you’re interested and willing to look)

Of course there are problems like there are anywhere but just to help you not be in a completely negative mindset about it if the move has to happen - it’s really a city you have to live in to fully appreciate

Salary will be fine,not at the exceptional level otherwise school fees wouldn’t be an issue, but decent enough for sure based on what @LALALife suggested was standard for comfortable living so we’ll be fine in that sense.

It’s the school piece for the 16 yr old that we know is problematic. But maybe we have to search for the IB schools as that would provide a solution of sorts - If we can get a place obviously. But this changes where we look live. We’re not set on an area as the High School needs to dictate that. And commuting times I guess.

Conversations with his company are on going so I guess it’ll be clearer in the coming weeks about what’s possible and in what timeframe and these details may determine whether this all happens.

Online media. Better keep it super vague.

I would get him to ask if they would cover school fees for DS, then at least you know if it’s an option - they can only say no. We weren’t offered any flights home, I got DH to ask so they offered 2 returns for the whole family in the first 2 years. I later found out other Europeans had pushed for annual flights and got them whereas people who hadn’t asked didn’t get anything, always worth asking if it gives you more options

I would also make sure that there is a clause in the contract allowing for paid time off and paid flights home in case of death of close family members.

Thanks for the advice re:flights and school fees. You’re right we can only ask and would only need the fees for one child for 2 yrs. It’s not a huge company and head office is in the UK so they’re easy going, family oriented people so I have no concerns about for paid time off etc.

They’ll prob offer this anyway esp as it’s an L1 transfer, but make sure he has U.K. holiday allowance not American!

How will you cope with the non-resident fees for university if he wants to come back to the U.K. for uni? He will have lost his residency status.

Say for example he went for Material science and engineering at Imperial. The fees for those resident in the U.K. are £9,250 a year, for non-residents it's £33,750.

Why do you all have to uproot all your lives just for your boyfriend/partner? I mean, your son is 16, you will be too g him from everything vital he needs right now, just for your bfs work...Why can't you just stay in the UK and your bf works away? Although I guess that's a very Western thing, to have to be together all the time.

He’d love to go to Imperial that would be his No1 choice.

But look I think one thing this year has taught us is nothing is certain, change happens, challenges happen and situations aren’t perfect. There are also lots of reasons why this is happening now, all justifiable I believe, and reasonable and maybe even the right decision (financially as well) but it’s just not necessarily something to have a discussion about in depth here.

All I need to think about is that if it does happen how do I manage the move for my family. Picking the right schooling option being paramount for the oldest.

Also thanks for all comments it is definitely helping me to frame the right questions to ask.

Honestly, nowhere will offer your 16 year old what he would benefit from most for his future education wise, I would be looking at ways to ensure he could stay in the UK, complete his studies, and then be eligible for student finance etc if he wants to apply for Imperial. Other than that, traffic is hell on earth, choose somewhere that doesn't involve a commute- especially over key routes. Check crime stats, as sad as it is some areas have increasing levels of poverty, homelessness and therefore crime; beneath the shiny facade some swathes are really not pleasant for families especially- this changes rapidly. Find out the relocation package first, and square away your marriage, I would be surprised if the company is looking into a family relocation rather than just your partner at this stage without one to be honest.

Quick wave up a currently very foggy Washington Blvd to say hi to @LALALife - I'm on the MdR peninsula.

Mar Vista is a lovely area: and I'd also recommend looking at Culver City too (very family orientated, great restaurant scene, short drive to beach, close to freeways, and has the Metro).

Can't really assist with the schooling aspect - though I know that friends have struggled with schools in Venice and have opted to send their kids to Pacific Palisades and further afield which becomes a nightmare commute.

Second the idea of joining the Facebook group Brits in LA: it's a hugely useful resource and we are all happy to chip in with answers, contacts and advice.

Building a credit score here is a nightmare - definitely get an Amex as soon as you can in the UK and build a good financial relationship with them (it really does help!). I was stuck with only being able to get pre-paid credit cards when I arrived, and having to give sizable deposits to utility companies /cell phone providers to sign-up with them which was an unforeseen cost.

If it's not already been discussed - ensure the company pays for good quality health insurance for the whole family. Even if they do pay you'll have extra costs to cover -but without (and without any ACA government subsidy) you would be looking at about ballpark $25k per year for a family of 4/5...

Feel free to reach out if I can help in anyway...