My mum had urgent but planned open heart surgery two weeks ago to repair an aneurysm and replace her aortic valve. She is 75 and was otherwise well with no obvious symptoms. We were all over worried about her but she got through the op seemingly successfully. I visited the next day and she was a bit confused but talking away and it was so nice to see her. She was still in ICU for the next few days and her kidneys had taken a hit (which can apparently happen with that surgery) but they started to get her up on her feet and sitting up in a chair.
Unfortunately since then, she has faced one complication after another - continued kidney failure and on dialysis, very high blood pressure, a chest infection, difficulties breathing and then it became clear she had had a rare allergic reaction to the blood thinner they routinely use (Heparin) which meant that instead of it thinning her blood, it created clots. We learned last week that she had a large clot in her aorta and were prepared for the worst. She seemed to rally a little in the day or two after and was fairly alert and chatty and we thought she might get better but her breathing deteriorated at the weekend and she was sedated and ventilated and has remained like this. There has been damage to her liver and they suspect sepsis (as a result of the HIT? This isn't completely clear). Apart from some very slight improvements in her bloods and liver function and slight reduction in her oxygen, she remains critically ill and we are getting to the point where they are running out of options.
My mum is everything to us - she was always out and about, has young grandchildren that she looked after every week (including my own wee one) and is the bedrock of our family. She was great company and we were in contact most days and she was a big emotional support to me especially. She also kept everything going for my dad (he is quite a bit older) and he is not coping at all without her. It has become clear that what we thought was a mild cognitive decline in him might be more than that and we are so worried about him too.
I can't believe we are here and that we will very likely lose her. It feels like a living nightmare and I veer from being in complete shock that we are here two weeks after I took her in to hospital seemingly fit and well, to feeling almost frozen in fear or feeling stupidly optimistic that maybe there is a slight chance she might start to recover. She is also in a hospital 60 miles away from us which makes it all seem even worse. I am devastated and just wanted to share with someone who doesn't know me for a bit of a virtual hand hold.