Last week my Dad was diagnosed with a brain tumour. Its been a terrible shock as we had no warning. Horrific.
He's been told that the radiation will hopefully repress his (very) recent symptoms. He's also been told that it can't be fully eradicated, so he'll have radiation and "after that, we'll take it from there".
However he has not been told that it is the most agressive form, that after the radiation it will be purely palliative care, and that he'll be dead by summer. Even typing those words is unreal......
I suspect the oncologist is doing a softly softly approach and does not have these conversations until after treatment is exhausted. So I'm presuming (??) that he'll have the radiation, he'll have temporary repreive, then he'll start to get sinister symptoms and THEN the news will be broken that its palliative. I guess?
Which I have no problem with, as he'll be distraught and it would be appalling for him to be told the full truth within a week of all this starting. He is a bit fragile as a person. He would turn his face to the wall. Talk of suicide, etc.
But in the last week all the extended family have rallied around and have visited him in hospital and have figured out enough on their own so that we basically had to admit the prognosis or flat out lie to their faces, which seemed pointless given how soon he's going to be gone.
So now we're in this grim phase where everyone knows but him.
It feels all wrong but they really had figured out it was very advanced, and he really shouldn't know yet based on his nervous emotional personality. Therefore I'm not sure how else things could have fallen.
Does anyone have any experience of this in their own cases? I'm devastated and I feel this "secret" is just adding to the torture.