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Original poster

Maternity Discrimination?

35 replies

Mummie96 · 08/10/2025 10:09

Hi!

I’m just looking for some advice and to see whether I’m upset for no reason!
I am currently on maternity leave and every year my employer has a team away day whereby we’re treated to a day of activities outside of the office. This year it is an all expensed overnight stay and dinner in a nice hotel. All employees get invited however this year I have not been because I am on maternity leave.
They haven’t communicated with me regarding the event, I have found out through a colleague.
I can’t help but feel left out and upset with the lack of invitation. I might not even have accepted but the plain fact I wasn’t thought about is kind of upsetting me.

My question is, how would you feel and really is this maternity discrimination?

thanks xx

OP posts:
Ciderapplevinegar · 08/10/2025 10:22

Don't be daft. You're not working, you're on maternity. You'll be included again once you're contributing to the team.

Original poster
Mummie96 · 08/10/2025 10:27

Ciderapplevinegar · 08/10/2025 10:22

Don't be daft. You're not working, you're on maternity. You'll be included again once you're contributing to the team.

Hi, thanks for your response. I have been contributing to the team as I have done multiple KIT days over the last couple of months. It’s not like I haven’t had no contact for the whole of my maternity leave.

OP posts:
PollyBell · 08/10/2025 10:31

No way would I be expected to be asked to go, and not everything surrounding someone who is pregnant is discrimination but i am sure of we wait a few mins someone will tell you to report them and stage a sit in

SadOldLadyOfTheLowlands · 08/10/2025 10:44

Ciderapplevinegar · 08/10/2025 10:22

Don't be daft. You're not working, you're on maternity. You'll be included again once you're contributing to the team.

No, you are wrong. OP should have been invited.

Slothey · 08/10/2025 13:59

I went to something similar to this on mat leave, using a KIT day.

It’s not daft at all to want to go. It’s in both your and your employer’s interest that you still feel like part of the team when you get back to work.

I have no idea on the legal position, just wanted to offer you some support.

user927464 · 08/10/2025 14:03

You ought to have been invited. I would advise you contact your manager and Im sure they will add you in. They have probably assumed you wouldn't want an overnight stay away from your small baby. Most wouldn't.

Bobiverse · 08/10/2025 14:04

It is maternity discrimination. It’s been tested in law and found to be maternity discrimination. They should have invited you.

Email your manager and ask about the arrangements as you have not received your invitation, and point out that you still need to be made aware of team bonuses and events and opportunities even whilst on mat leave.

MidnightPatrol · 08/10/2025 14:06

They’ve probably just assumed you won’t fancy an overnight away trip while on maternity leave.

Just message your manager and said you’ve heard about the trip, and were you intentionally left out as you would like to join.

I don’t know why you’d jump to the assumption you were being intentionally discriminated against.

SalmonOnFinnCrisp · 08/10/2025 14:07

I have 2 kids... I seen jaw dropping levels of mat discrimination.

This might technically be discrimination but imo you are being ridiculous and i pwuld not kick up a fuss.
Im surprised its discrimination as i would have thought it would actually be problematic if they did invite you apropos of nothing while you are on leave.

If you want to go message them and ask or see if you can do it as a kit day or something if you want. I wouldnt be upset or bothered

Megifer · 08/10/2025 14:10

It is discrimination. Possibly accidentally and an oversight/breakdown in comms.

Have you asked your manager why you weren't invited?

TorroFerney · 08/10/2025 14:11

Mummie96 · 08/10/2025 10:27

Hi, thanks for your response. I have been contributing to the team as I have done multiple KIT days over the last couple of months. It’s not like I haven’t had no contact for the whole of my maternity leave.

Show quote history

Im a Manager and yes I’d ask you/include you . My mat leave team member will be invited to our Christmas do. Is it budget related? If it was I’d still be in touch and tell you that.

i think it’s out of sight out of mind when you are not there no matter why , which is why everyone who makes their job their whole life and gives too much needs to have a think! I’m not saying you op o mean people who cancel holidays , work extra etc and then are amazed when they get made redundant .

CrocodileJen · 08/10/2025 14:12

Ridiculous to jump straight to maternity discrimination. If you want to go, just email them and say so, am sure it will be fine. Wanting an invite just for the sake of it when you’re not even sure you’ll attend though is immature, it’s a workplace and I’m sure they just assumed you didn’t want to be bothered while on leave. They’re not your friends, they don’t need to continuously be thinking about you while you’re off for a year or whatever. If they had have included you I’m sure you’d be on here saying you feel pressured into going while you’re on leave.

dammit88 · 08/10/2025 14:13

I would just ask to go! Don’t assume the worst …. If you ask and they say no, then I’d think you could argue discrimination

Darragon · 08/10/2025 14:14

Yeah while you might win a bit of dosh at a tribunal, is it worth it for basically blackening your name at work and burning bridges?
I wouldn’t go in guns blazing, if you mention it at all I would go from the assumption that it was a mistake/that they thought you would be too busy with a new baby.

indoorplantqueen · 08/10/2025 14:21

I think you should’ve been invited, but with no expectation to go. You might like a night away and to catch up with colleagues

roseymoira · 08/10/2025 14:23

They would have presumed you wouldn’t be interested in an overnight stay. Just call and say you’d like to go.

SErunner · 08/10/2025 14:25

You should have been invited, but are you honestly that bothered? I’d let it drop.

ShesTheAlbatross · 08/10/2025 14:26

I think you should have been invited. But in this instance (unless there have been other issues around your pregnancy and maternity leave) I think you’d be unreasonable to assume bad intentions from them.

myuzername · 08/10/2025 14:27

I think you should have been invited! I agree it is likely discrimination however I wouldn’t word it that way to them. I would send a message and say you would potentially like to attend and what are the details please. If they try to say no you can’t come because you’re in maternity then that’s a different story

Shellyash · 08/10/2025 14:30

I run a business, and this is the hardest thing, damned if you do and damned if you don't. We don't arrange days out or Christmas parties or activity days because employment is a minefield and one tiny mistake and the whole judicial system jumps up and down on your head. Closes your business down if possible
Do your employer for discrimination, get paid out £9k and yes you are in the right, they are in the wrong. They have inadvertantly screwed up - and from now on they also cancel these days as it is too risky.
Sorry for the rant, and you are likely correct but don't bite the hand that feeds you.

Bobiverse · 08/10/2025 14:35

Shellyash · 08/10/2025 14:30

I run a business, and this is the hardest thing, damned if you do and damned if you don't. We don't arrange days out or Christmas parties or activity days because employment is a minefield and one tiny mistake and the whole judicial system jumps up and down on your head. Closes your business down if possible
Do your employer for discrimination, get paid out £9k and yes you are in the right, they are in the wrong. They have inadvertantly screwed up - and from now on they also cancel these days as it is too risky.
Sorry for the rant, and you are likely correct but don't bite the hand that feeds you.

Would you say that about any other rights? Or just the rights of women who have had children?

This isn’t a “maybe it is, maybe it isn’t.” It is discrimination and was very easily avoided by the company following the law.

It isn’t damned if you do, damned if you don’t. It’s a company wide invitation, so you invite everyone. You don’t leave someone out because they had a baby. Not difficult.

Shellyash · 08/10/2025 14:38

Bobiverse · 08/10/2025 14:35

Would you say that about any other rights? Or just the rights of women who have had children?

This isn’t a “maybe it is, maybe it isn’t.” It is discrimination and was very easily avoided by the company following the law.

It isn’t damned if you do, damned if you don’t. It’s a company wide invitation, so you invite everyone. You don’t leave someone out because they had a baby. Not difficult.

Show quote history

Just saying.

Megifer · 08/10/2025 14:48

Shellyash · 08/10/2025 14:30

I run a business, and this is the hardest thing, damned if you do and damned if you don't. We don't arrange days out or Christmas parties or activity days because employment is a minefield and one tiny mistake and the whole judicial system jumps up and down on your head. Closes your business down if possible
Do your employer for discrimination, get paid out £9k and yes you are in the right, they are in the wrong. They have inadvertantly screwed up - and from now on they also cancel these days as it is too risky.
Sorry for the rant, and you are likely correct but don't bite the hand that feeds you.

Owners who manage their business properly dont generally worry about arranging parties for their employees IME.

Shellyash · 08/10/2025 14:54

Megifer · 08/10/2025 14:48

Owners who manage their business properly dont generally worry about arranging parties for their employees IME.

Show quote history

Correct. I certainly don't worry about it.