House, dc, partner, wills.....how.do I work all this out?

[Stopthatknocking]

Hi, I have 2 DC. One is young adult and living independently. Other is older teenager, but due to disability, probably never going to be able to live independently.
Partner lives with me. He is not DC father.
House is mine alone, mortgage will be paid off in 5-7 years

I want to leave house to DC as it's my only asset. But I don't want partner to be homeless if he outlives me.

How do I even go about providing for my disabled DC, being fair to my older DC, and ensuring my partner has somewhere to live?
Current will splits everything 50/50 between children, but now partner lives with me, it's all got complicated.

I have no idea where to start.
Thanks

Also it might not be suitable for his lifetime. Someone I know has inherited in this way, where she has the right to live in their home until she dies, but she wants to move to be near to her daughter. She only gets half the value if she makes the move. Presumably in your case he wouldn't get anything if he wanted to make a move.

You would make your kids wait however long instead of expecting him to utilise either his other property, or the funds from the sale of it? That seems a little unreasonable.

A breathing space of a year or something, yes. But given he may live for 20 years after you pass, with other assets etc, while your kids receive nada anything more would seem short sighted.

If he has a life interest he's allowed to downsize (the equity of the house is what is in the trust rather than the house itself). (If it's just a right of occupation its different of course). He could go into a home and the house be rented out (he has the right to the income so that will include rent). He shouldn't be trapped by this.

If he still has capacity, he can also disclaim now and the house pass to you (there are tax implications as the house would be in his IHT estate. So it would be in the daughter's interests if IHT is an issue for him to perhaps look at getting shot now).

The trustees have a duty of care to whoever the eventually beneficiaries are after he dies so they are responsible for ensuring he maintains the house otherwise he could be breaching the terms of the trust (depending on the wording in the will).

Tricky though!! I suppose it's not really something you can get involved in much for now.

Regarding your disabled child. I’m of the impression that having money/inheritance makes government support come to a halt until the money is below a certain threshold therefor not being of any help to the recipient. I believe a trust that allocates only a small portion regularly can be set up as to not interfere with benefits.
I’d focus on your disabled child’s needs vs the other two initially. It might be best if dc2 does not inherit half, but needs a bespoke arrangement.

He has the right to live there but no ownership.
My Mum wanted to move somewhere more manageable for the last 5 or so years before she died but he wouldn't - of course as it was her house she could have forced it but he would have been very very difficult and she didn't feel strong enough.
This is a man who left her lying on the floor in considerable pain after she fell out of bed because he was "too tired to deal with it".
Anyway, he is in his 80's with multiple health issues so hopefully he won't be a problem for much longer

He sounds awful.I suppose at least your mum made a will and didn't leave him the house.outright. Or didnt leave things up to the intestacy rules. So it could be worse although perhaps that's cold comfort.

A right of occupation (as well.as a life interest) will also usually.mean the house is in his IHT estate incidentally. If that's useful to you.

Make a Will now thinking about the next 10 years, not a Will for when you are 80.

If something befalls you in the next 10 years your DP is well able to be independent, you may want to say he has two years to sell the house. But this is much too soon, IMO, to give him a life interest in the house (in which it is bequeathed to your Dc but he can live in it for the rest of his life) meaning your D.C. wouldn’t inherit for another 30 years.

Revisit your Will in 10 years time and regularly thereafter, amending to suit your circumstances as you age.

That would be fine in "normal" circumstances, and is pretty normal - it's a "life interest in possession" trust. But in the OP's case, it sounds like the disabled child will need "something" a lot sooner, i.e. income or capital (a home) if they're going to be unable to work. It's not much use them knowing they're getting half a house, but 30 years or so after they actually need it!

If it were me, I'd be leaving the house to the children and telling my partner that he won't be getting it and that he needs to start making his own arrangements for somewhere to live when I die. Harsh, but the circumstances dictate that the disabled child needs are greater than the surviving partner.

Reading all the views here, I'm now thinking a trust for dc2, (thier dad will also contribute to this) and a 2 or 3 year right to stay in the house for my partner, giving him time to grieve and then sort out somewhere else to live.

Not sure how to split things between the 2 dc.
I guess I need to.see a solicitor armed with some ideas, but an open mind too.

The surviving partner who has his own money!

I have a partner of 15 years. I own the house outright that we live in.

We sought advice from a solicitor and have mirror wills agreed.

Prior to this we were getting really bogged down considering more and more eventualities. Some advice I read was plan your will for the next 5 years and then review annually or at times of significant change.

We looked at if one of us dies in the next five years, what would this need to offer each other and our children. Solicitor has written the will according to our wishes. My DP will have a life interest and be able to stay in the house. Savings will be split 50% to partner, other 50% between DC’s (higher percentage of my savings to my DC’s and same for DP). Pension entitlement is sorted naming each other.

Looking at the next five years stopped us considering ‘what happens if DP can't manage the stairs in the house and needs to move, what happens if DP is too old to maintain the house, who pays, what if he lets it fall into disrepair etc etc). This had paralysed any decisions.

Unlike you, I don't have a child who requires support. DP and I are also long into our relationship and all of our children would expect, just as if we were married, that the partner is looked after.

Yes GildedRage- this is the approach we have taken, with regard to our disabled adult child. We have divided any estate into equal shares for all our children, but the portion for our disabled child is in a trust. Our other children are the trustees. We talked this over with them in great detail. They know what kinds of things the money should be spent on-things which enhance their siblings quality of life, treats, good clothing, accompanied holidays and breaks. OP, you need specialist advice on this type of trust. Mencap were a great help, they will have a list of suitable solicitors in your area. I cannot tell you how helpful our solicitors were. They helped us think through lots of scenarios. Try not to disadvantage your elder child. Best wishes for sorting it all out. I know for us, the sense of relief was immense, once it was all organised.
As an aside we have experience in our extended family with an elderly person who has a lifetime interest in a property which no longer meets their needs, is falling into disrepair, disagreements amongst family on renting out the property…. It’s a mess

Have you sought advice on inheritance tax? If you aren’t married you need to think this through; assuming you die first then a life interest trust means double tax on the property ( if the estate value is over the threshold when you die), once when you die and then again when your parter passes away. Even if you leave your partner 2-3 years to reside in the house, if IHT is due how would your kids pay it (within the 6 months deadline) if they can’t sell the house?

The rules are changing over the next couple of years to include pensions, so more people will be caught by IHT. Without the spousal exemption this becomes even more important.

I'd definitely see a solicitor as this is not straightforward. It sounds like a trust could be set up for DC.