Executor Query

[Queenanne20]

MIL sadly passed away recently. Dh and his sister are the beneficiaries of her Will, being left 50% each. SIL and Solicitor are the two Executors as Dh has health problems and it was agreed when MIL wrote her Will that Dh would be unable to act as Executor. We have just found out that Dhs share of the inheritance is a lot less than we estimated it to be. SIL has said she is sending him half the proceeds from the house sale after fees etc and half the money that was in the bank account, again, after settling all outstanding bills etc. This amount is a fair few thousand less than we expected it to be but SIL insists it's all that is left over. Apparently, she sacked the Solicitor and has acted as sole Executor and is refusing to give Dh a breakdown of how she has arrived at this figure. Did she have the right to stop the Solicitor acting as Executor and can she refuse to give Dh details of where all the money has gone?

Oh my experience was just horrendous.

My father had never been in my life after i was aged 3. He met a new woman and moved to another country with her. And he refused to speak to me ever again. He also refused to pay any maintenence so i grew up in poverty. As my dad didnt speak to me, none of my dads family spoke to me all my life either. They were a cold bunch. Including my uncle. Mad dad never married the new woman he was with - thats important for will purposes.

30 years later my father died. When i heard, i had a feeling that he might leave something to me in his will, as that was the type of man he was.

He was cold, completely uninvolved as a father in every way possible to me, but he was the type that would leave a pracitcal inheritance for his child, for their future.

My dad left his whole estate to me and my brother. And he had made my uncle executor.

As me and my uncle had not known each other at all, that made the process worse. As now we had to talk to each other for the first time in bad circumstances. And when he did talk to me, right after my dad died, my uncle talked to me like i wasnt a member of their family at all. My uncle was cruel and cold to me in every conversation. I had a nervous breakdown from how nasty he was to me.

His whole attitude was "i cant believe that you have been left the money. You're not part of our family".

Still i thought my uncle would honor what my dad wanted, be civil, and honor what the will wanted. He knew That my dad wanted me looked after.

My uncle didnt do that. My uncle seemed to be disgusted that i had been left the money. He fought me at every turn. He should never have been executor. My uncle didnt see me as part of my dads family and he treated me with dusgust and cruelty for three years after my dad died

. By the time i got any money three years later, id had a mental health breakdown from it all, and i was a complete shell of a person.

I have a brother. It would be like my brother having a daughter that lived abroad. And he died and left her money. And then i kept saying to her "you shouldnt eveen be getting this money. Youre not part of this family"

Thats the level of cruelty i put up with. Im in therapy over it.

If you have legal cover with your home insurance use that to get a solicitor letter sent, this may persuade the executor you are being serious! Even if you have to pay a few hundred pounds to get a solicitor letter this is a small fraction of what you are expecting and in my mind a good investment,

Are you sure there was nothing like equity release or other debts to be paid on her death.

That is horrible; an awful experience for you - but also there might be very small comfort in the knowledge your father didn't completely scrub your existence from his life, even though he'd ignored you for most of it.

I hope you gain peace and acceptance from therapy to enable you to move on with your life.

There’s no way of knowing what there is or isn’t as only the executor has access to the information.

there could be a million pound life insurance policy. But you wouldn’t know until the executor provides the accounts/pays out.

the executor I’m in conflict with has said there is only the deceased current account. I know for certain there is at least one ISA, and I think it’s very likely there was an insurance policy payout, we know they had the policy, but no details of it or what would be due.

i’d need to go to court with evidence to show the executor is either hiding the money or hasn’t done their due diligence in finding and collecting all assets. That would be £££££ in court costs, and it may be the money in those accounts isn’t much. So do I let it go, and cut losses? If it’s a decent amount the executor gets away with free money.

What is the basis of your knowledge of the ISA and insurance policy? Put this in your letter, again to show that you are serious

Just be aware that insurance policy proceeds often fall outside of the estate, if they are held in trust. It’s quite common as it means the payout happens quickly. An ISA account would fall within the estate though.

You are correct - Me and my brother were joint executors to my late father’a estate and he had to complete a form to relinquish his duties (which he did because he was living abroad)

I have been a beneficiary and also Sole Executor of wills.

I certainly wouldn’t want to change the whole system so a solicitor took over all estates. Much better to not have a solicitor as an Executor and buy in any experitise you need. That is what I did. I am sorry for the PP who had such a horrendous time but solicitors drag things out, only work at one pace and realistically the person who blame for the PP horrible situation is actually her late Father who put someone so flaky in the position. That and having say three children and not leaving it equally is what really gets to me.

A friend of mine had this.

Only found out after death of parent. The parent had split the estate due to two siblings having stable relationships and the third sibling being single after terrible decision making with men. She left 80% of her estate to the single child . It caused huge problems in the family because we were taking about nearly £1m!

This isn’t good. It can cost the estate £££. I would have a clear robust discussion with the solicitor in advance and ask them to be very clear how much of a chance they have.

its also a problem if the testator names a solicitor or a firm as executor. A mate of mine had trouble when the named solicitor had retired and couldn't be found and the firm he had been a partner at had closed down!

The person in question has no chance - she's not a named beneficiary (her husband is), nor was she being supported by my BIL at the time of his death. She's just a rather unpleasant individual trying to bully another relative out of her well-deserved much larger share of the estate.

This is the fourth time I've been a sole executor and I'm fortunate enough to have access to free qualified legal advice from a member of my own family.

Just ensure that this person doesn’t bully or persuade a beneficiary to put in a claim. Without being too outing something happened in my wider family whereby there were half siblings and a husband of many years some of whom were his children and others who were children from various previous relationships. They all ended up suing each other.

Our wills (married couple) are that we are sole Executors and our grown up children are if either of us have passed. Legal help can be brought in on an ad hoc basis. I have done this a few times and it keeps the solicitors on their toes.

I'm carrying out the wishes of two Wills to the letter (my BIL was the surviving spouse and this is the winding-up of their joint estate). These particular siblings have only been left a quarter share of the net proceeds of sale of the house to be divided between them, and the conveyancing solicitor has agreed to remit to them in my behalf to avoid any arguments.

If the unpleasant relative manages to convince her husband to sue his siblings for whatever reason she can think of that's up to her/them; to me it'll be vaguely entertaining.

If SIL has nothing to hide, she has nothing to fear. So if she refuses to supply the account information, doesn't that point to her being less than honest about things....

Do you mean they were step children or his children?

Both.