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Original poster

Can I decline this gift in will?

60 replies

NewQpt · 27/04/2025 12:10

My dad had a will written about 3 years ago where all his assets (family home, cash and pension) went to my mum upon his death. He passed away 18 months ago.

When my mum passes away, the will states everything is to be shared equally between myself and my two siblings.

For personal reasons, I may decide to decline interest in the family house part of the gift but happy to receive my share of everything else. Will I simply be able to disclaim it at the time of my mum's death even though the will was written over two years ago?

Thank you

OP posts:
Harassedevictee · 27/04/2025 16:23

I think you need to wait until your Mum dies. No one can predict the future so making decisions now means you do not have the full picture. When that sad time comes then evaluate your options.

It also depends on how your Dad’s will is actually worded. It sounds like he may have left his 50% of the house as a life interest for your Mum.

Ideally you should seek legal advice on what the will actually means and your options.

Ddakji · 27/04/2025 16:26

I would absolutely get this sorted otherwise you will count as owning two homes. Can’t you speak to your mum about?

Foodoverload · 27/04/2025 16:52

Agree with you siblings what to do. My dad’s flat who my brother owns 50% just now will be split between us - so I get 25%. He wants to live there so we have agreed he will give me 25% of the equity. It got complicated in the will to write that in so we have done a verbal agreement

but I suppose that depends if your siblings are agreeable

MoreChocPls · 27/04/2025 16:56

Your mum is still alive and you have no idea what the future holds so why is this a question now?

Ddakji · 27/04/2025 17:01

MoreChocPls · 27/04/2025 16:56

Your mum is still alive and you have no idea what the future holds so why is this a question now?

Because there’s nothing worse than simultaneously dealing with grief from a bereavement and the nightmare of a poorly thought-through will.

It is the responsibility of the living to leave their affairs in good order so as not to create a burden to their loved ones.

godmum56 · 27/04/2025 17:02

Ddakji · 27/04/2025 17:01

Because there’s nothing worse than simultaneously dealing with grief from a bereavement and the nightmare of a poorly thought-through will.

It is the responsibility of the living to leave their affairs in good order so as not to create a burden to their loved ones.

Show quote history

yup, but as I said, the OP has to talk to her Mum. Nothing else will work or help at this stage.

Maddy70 · 27/04/2025 17:08

Could you keep your share of the house and state that your sibling can remain there until she wants it sold but she maintains it to a reasonable standard in lieu of rent for living in you and your other sisters property

AgnethaF · 27/04/2025 17:12

surely it would be what it is in your mothers will that matters now? Your dads will has been executed so your DM can write whatever she wants now?

Comefromaway · 27/04/2025 17:18

If your sibling wants to live there there are a couple of choices.

You can get the house valued and they have to buy you out
You can allow then to live there and either pay proportional rent or it be rent free but they have to maintain it
you can force a sale.

Changingplace · 27/04/2025 17:19

NewQpt · 27/04/2025 13:53

It's my dad's will and all this assumes my mum doesn't need to sell it for her own care in future.

I think the sibling who lives there will most probably want to continue doing so especially as it's morgtage free. We wouldn't evict her either. She's not the easiest person to get on with so owning a house together wouldn't work.

Is there a time limit from our dad's death in order to decline? Or can I do it upon mum's passing which could be years.

What’s in your dads will isn’t now relevant, it’s what’s in your mums will that matters.

In the meantime the house might need selling to cover care fees anyway.

If you did end up jointly owning the house your sibling would need to buy out your share, giving it up would make no sense. Do your siblings understand how that would need to work?

Ddakji · 27/04/2025 17:22

godmum56 · 27/04/2025 17:02

yup, but as I said, the OP has to talk to her Mum. Nothing else will work or help at this stage.

Show quote history

I agree - I wasn’t replying to you.

caringcarer · 27/04/2025 17:29

Why can't siblings continue to live their and pay you and other sibling 1/3 of market rent each? All 3 would need to agree on sharing maintenance cost.

minnienono · 27/04/2025 17:34

Your dad’s will is null and void now as the action was to pass onto your mum. Your mum needs her own will (did they do mirror wills before he died?)

I think you need to have a discussion with your siblings at some point because your resident sibling would need to buy your interest out really.

caringcarer · 27/04/2025 17:35

I think DH will have a similar situation when his Mum does. His brother lives there hardly paying his Mum any money to contribute towards bills. The will says house to be sold and money split 50/50 because his Mum said a 3 bedroom house will be too big for just his brother. Brother could buy DH out of his half as he has savings. He'll probably just want to sit tight without buying DH out. They are joint executors. DH says he will probably wait 6 months to give his brother time to grieve then tell him they sell the house, or bother buys him out of his half or he pays DH market rent on his half and they go halves on maintenance. DH is expecting his brother to just want to stay there without paying 1/2 rent or buying him out.

Soontobe60 · 27/04/2025 17:37

NewQpt · 27/04/2025 12:22

I understand you can either disclaim a gift or prepare a deed of variation. I'd prefer doing the former after our mum passes away but unsure about the 2 year thing. Basically I don't want interest in the house.

But why not just sell the house and split the proceeds? That’s what usually happens.

Soontobe60 · 27/04/2025 17:38

BeNiceWhenItsFinished · 27/04/2025 12:33

The other beneficiaries have no say.

The executor(s) are responsible for distributing the estate and if a beneficiary says they don't want to inherit some or all of it, then the executor(s) take that into consideration. Sometimes, the help of a solicitor is best, to advise on legal matters.

Show quote history

It’s not as simple as that though.

Soontobe60 · 27/04/2025 17:42

NewQpt · 27/04/2025 13:53

It's my dad's will and all this assumes my mum doesn't need to sell it for her own care in future.

I think the sibling who lives there will most probably want to continue doing so especially as it's morgtage free. We wouldn't evict her either. She's not the easiest person to get on with so owning a house together wouldn't work.

Is there a time limit from our dad's death in order to decline? Or can I do it upon mum's passing which could be years.

Your dad has left everything to your mum, so his will is complete now. Your mum could actually make a new will and do whatever she wants with the house. She could say it has to be sold and the money split 3 ways. She could say the house goes to 1 sibling and the others have cash assets (but this isn’t a great idea as she may well have no cash by the time she dies). What she can’t do is to say the house cannot be sold. Once it belongs to an inheritor they can do what they like with it.

Phoebepeeby · 27/04/2025 17:43

How is your mum? Is she able to have a conversation about your concerns?

1AngelicFruitCake · 27/04/2025 17:47

But surely you’re putting the problem onto your other sibling? Will there be money left that the one living in the house could use to buy you both out? Otherwise you need to sell

BlackWhiteCircle · 27/04/2025 17:49

I wouldn’t rush to lose money from the house. When the will needs to be evoked, then your sibling either has to buy you out to stay by getting a mortgage or sell. They don’t get to just convince you to give them a free 1/3 of a house.

BeNiceWhenItsFinished · 27/04/2025 17:54

Soontobe60 · 27/04/2025 17:38

It’s not as simple as that though.

Show quote history

I know it's not. That's why I suggested that a solicitor should be involved.

I was just pointing out that the beneficiaries of a will cannot decide what happens to bequests to someone else.

Original poster
NewQpt · 27/04/2025 17:55

Phoebepeeby · 27/04/2025 17:43

How is your mum? Is she able to have a conversation about your concerns?

She wants everything to be split three ways so as not to cause conflict but I don't think that can be avoided. I know my other sibling feels similar to me.

As PP, we won't rush into a decision just yet.

OP posts:
GoodNamesOnly · 27/04/2025 17:58

I suppose you should also think of any children you and your siblings have or may have in the future. Ie would your children resent their cousins inheriting a property that they could have had some claim to?

Original poster
NewQpt · 27/04/2025 17:58

Ddakji · 27/04/2025 16:26

I would absolutely get this sorted otherwise you will count as owning two homes. Can’t you speak to your mum about?

Are there implications to owning two homes?

OP posts:
Ddakji · 27/04/2025 18:00

NewQpt · 27/04/2025 17:55

She wants everything to be split three ways so as not to cause conflict but I don't think that can be avoided. I know my other sibling feels similar to me.

As PP, we won't rush into a decision just yet.

Show quote history

She needs to understand that in order for that to happen the house that is your sibling’s home will have to be sold. So your sibling has to be 100% on board with this, and it would be better if they were to move out sooner rather than later.

A good solicitor should point that out as well.

I don’t know how old your mum is or in what state of health but I would get on with sorting this out sooner rather than later.