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Original poster

Can I be sued for adjusting friends wedding dress?

240 replies

Indulgingmum · 20/11/2024 12:08

I have a "friend" haven't seen her for few years we drifted apart. Her wedding has been cancelled twice once with Covid and once with her mother's sudden death.

Her original dress is toooooo big now she's lost loads of weight.

She contacted me
Out of the blue to ask would I take up her new dress as she hadn't time to get a dressmaker because they are eloping.

I make my own clothes so it's something I am
Able to do. I said yes if you're in a fix.

So she brought me dress said it was from her other friend and its needs turned up. When she tried it on it needed a couple other small things fixed too where it was badly constructed.

I cut 19cm off the dress and hemmed it (4 layers) and spent ages unpicking the back seam and straightening it. I then made a waist sash out of the hem as asked.

She collected the dress two weeks ago. I did this as a favour so no money or anything changed hands.

The brides other friend contacted me on Facebook and said I'd ruined her dress. Said she was going to see a solicitor because it was ruined and she couldn't use it again ( it's a wedding dress made with fairly cheap fabric and wouldn't have cost a lot to start with and was badly constructed) when I gave it back it was in better condition than what I received.

Can she sue me for doing this? As far as I was aware it was the brides to do with as she pleased. I've messaged the bride and she hasn't replied.

OP posts:
Sceptical123 · 22/11/2024 08:05

Indulgingmum · 21/11/2024 07:47

Ok I've had a reply from bride.

I was so bloody shocked you cut so much off the bottom!! Who even does that? All you had to do was fold the hem up a bit and put a stitch on it. It didn't matter if it was dragging a bit. I didn't ask you to fix the back seam - you did that to make yourself look good. I will be wearing a cardy so no one will see it. Xxxxx is pissed off at me now so I had to tell her you did it not me. She can fight with you about it. I have enough on my plate with the elopement.

I'm lost for words. She was delighted when she collected the dress that it fit her so well and she said herself the little sash I made from the hem really finished off the dull waistline!

I've blocked them both and I'm going to put this down to experience. Shame on me for falling for a sob story. No wonder people don't help each other out anymore. I hope someone tells her there is no folding hems in wedding dresses. Arrrggghhhh. I'm so annoyed!

I cut 19cm off the dress and hemmed it (4 layers) and spent ages unpicking the back seam and straightening it. I then made a waist sash out of the hem as asked.

So she asked you to cut it off or make the sash once you’d cut it off? Did you tell her when she was trying it on what you’d need to do? Did she tell you her friend had given it to her to keep or to borrow?

Sounds like miscommunication.

Your former friend is obv no friend. No doubt she’ll be suing you if she doesn’t enjoy her own wedding now 🙄

prh47bridge · 22/11/2024 08:05

Kool4katz · 22/11/2024 07:42

I do wish posters would stop giving ‘advice’ when they only have a passing understanding of the law.

In the case you quoted above, there is clearly a relationship between the Plaintiff who requested the work to be done and the Defendant who completed the work.

In the OP’s case, she has no legal relationship whatsoever with the friend of friend.

Show quote history

I do wish posters would check the quote history so that they understand what they are responding to when posting and not contradict correct advice. This was related to the question of whether the bride could sue OP, not whether the owner of the dress had a case. The owner of the dress clearly doesn't, as I said earlier in that conversation.

Iamnotalemming · 22/11/2024 08:17

She sounds like a selfish idiotic berk.
You sound lovely. And an excellent seamstress!

Rosscameasdoody · 22/11/2024 08:18

MargaretThursday · 22/11/2024 07:37

TBF in the op she says that the bride told her it belonged to the other friend and asked for it to be turned up.

If someone had said that to me, then I wouldn't have been cutting anything without thoroughly checking first.

I'd have suggested things like turning it up and putting some sort of trim round the bottom to hide the turn up. I'd have made it clear that turning up would look rubbish on its own.

I can see why the original owner is horrified
I can also see why the bride feels she isn't responsible if she said it was someone else's and please can you turn it up. That is very different from cutting it.

OP didn’t say anything of the sort. She said the bride brought her the dress and said she’d got it from another friend. Nothing at all about who now owned it. And the bride asked for a sash to be made out of the hem offcuts - if she didn’t know OP was cutting the hem where did she think the fabric was coming from ? And in what world can you just turn up 19cm of extra hem on four layers of skirt. The bride knew what she was doing and tried to blame OP when her friend was rightly angry at the extensive alterations made without her permission. That’s on the bride, not the OP.

patchworkbear · 22/11/2024 08:20

She wants money from you so she can buy herself a new dress

Dollybantree · 22/11/2024 08:23

Indulgingmum · 21/11/2024 07:47

Ok I've had a reply from bride.

I was so bloody shocked you cut so much off the bottom!! Who even does that? All you had to do was fold the hem up a bit and put a stitch on it. It didn't matter if it was dragging a bit. I didn't ask you to fix the back seam - you did that to make yourself look good. I will be wearing a cardy so no one will see it. Xxxxx is pissed off at me now so I had to tell her you did it not me. She can fight with you about it. I have enough on my plate with the elopement.

I'm lost for words. She was delighted when she collected the dress that it fit her so well and she said herself the little sash I made from the hem really finished off the dull waistline!

I've blocked them both and I'm going to put this down to experience. Shame on me for falling for a sob story. No wonder people don't help each other out anymore. I hope someone tells her there is no folding hems in wedding dresses. Arrrggghhhh. I'm so annoyed!

The amount of absolutely batshit cheeky fuckery I read on here never fails to shock me.

As I have never (thankfully) encountered people who would act this way in RL I just find it really hard to believe! Not saying op is lying just that it’s mad as a box of frogs.

Also puzzles me why people like the op come on asking if they could be sued 🤨 surely anyone with half a brain knows the crazy dress owner would get laughed out of the solicitors office?

NigelHarmansNewWife · 22/11/2024 08:25

Okay @Rosscameasdoody I was wrong about the weight loss point. Let's not muddy the waters though, the OP acted in good faith to help her friend to whom she explained what she would need to do to shorten the dress. She also corrected a technical defect in the original construction to improve the way the garment hangs. None of this makes the OP liable to the OB. The OP thought her friend had permission from the OB to get the dress altered.

Rosscameasdoody · 22/11/2024 08:26

Kool4katz · 22/11/2024 07:42

I do wish posters would stop giving ‘advice’ when they only have a passing understanding of the law.

In the case you quoted above, there is clearly a relationship between the Plaintiff who requested the work to be done and the Defendant who completed the work.

In the OP’s case, she has no legal relationship whatsoever with the friend of friend.

Show quote history

Foot in mouth time. This poster is a solicitor and has posted on MN for some years now. And her post was clarifying the relevance of the lack of contract, not commenting on who has a case against who.

cherrysodas · 22/11/2024 08:26

Wow I’m shocked. You put in loads of work, for free, and this is what you get. Dreadful.

NigelHarmansNewWife · 22/11/2024 08:28

Also puzzles me why people like the op come on asking if they could be sued 🤨 surely anyone with half a brain knows the crazy dress owner would get laughed out of the solicitors office?

Because the message from the friend is so off the scale and the very opposite of what she said is person/via thank you messages. That kind of thing makes an honest person with self awareness question whether they have made a terrible mistake, especially as the friend now seems really upset/annoyed. The OP has sensibly blocked the two idiots though.

PortiasBiscuit · 22/11/2024 08:29

The one I feel sorry for here is the Bridegroom…

Mostlyoblivious · 22/11/2024 08:33

What an awful person!!

fyi, screen shot the convos as messages can be deleted both sides but no, there’s no legal come back here

Whyherewego · 22/11/2024 08:33

In so annoyed for you OP. You did such a nice favour for someone and it's been thrown back in your face. Glad you've blocked them all.
They certainly have no grounds for monetary recompense or sueing you. They'll quickly realise this.

Whyherewego · 22/11/2024 08:36

Rosscameasdoody · 22/11/2024 08:18

OP didn’t say anything of the sort. She said the bride brought her the dress and said she’d got it from another friend. Nothing at all about who now owned it. And the bride asked for a sash to be made out of the hem offcuts - if she didn’t know OP was cutting the hem where did she think the fabric was coming from ? And in what world can you just turn up 19cm of extra hem on four layers of skirt. The bride knew what she was doing and tried to blame OP when her friend was rightly angry at the extensive alterations made without her permission. That’s on the bride, not the OP.

Show quote history

100pc. The sash precisely means the bride knew exactly what was happening but is now washing her hands of the situation

Dawevi · 22/11/2024 08:39

TheTruthICantSay · 21/11/2024 10:36

I still don't think youa re in the slightest bit to blame for any of this, but for the record, if you're going to actually cut off the hem, I'd have mentioned that to her myself.

It isn't possible to shorten a wedding gown without cutting the excess off. For one they are massively tapered, and the fabric needs a rolled hem (or a cut one for net) which you have to cut it for. Plus this dress needed 7.5 inches off which would be too much to turn up anyway even in a straight skirt.

If the bride had actually told the OP it couldn't be cut then it is possible to lift a dress with bustles, though it changes the look usually, but that isn't usual.

Plus, the bride wanted a sash made with the excess, so she knew it would be cut off!

None of this is the OP's fault at all.

Rosscameasdoody · 22/11/2024 08:40

NigelHarmansNewWife · 22/11/2024 08:25

Okay @Rosscameasdoody I was wrong about the weight loss point. Let's not muddy the waters though, the OP acted in good faith to help her friend to whom she explained what she would need to do to shorten the dress. She also corrected a technical defect in the original construction to improve the way the garment hangs. None of this makes the OP liable to the OB. The OP thought her friend had permission from the OB to get the dress altered.

Not disagreeing with any of that, as per my previous posts. Maybe l wasn’t clear on the permission part - l meant that the bride didn’t have permission from the owner of the dress, not that OP didn’t have permission from the bride. Although some posters have brought up an interesting point - given that OP says the bride initially wanted the dress turned up and stitched did OP just go ahead and cut the dress and alter the other seam without checking with the bride first ? It would seem not, as the bride wanted a sash made from the offcuts, but was this agreed before or after cutting.

As a seamstress OP would know that it wasn’t viable to just turn up a 19cm hem on four layers of skirt, and was eager to do a good job, including correcting a faulty seam. But did she actually communicate this to the bride or just press ahead knowing what needed to be done ? My guess is that it was discussed and agreed beforehand as the alterations were so detailed, but maybe OP could come back and clarify.

Hairyesterdaygonetoday · 22/11/2024 08:49

StringOrNothing · 21/11/2024 08:17

Imagine that a bride asks you as a favour to embroider a little butterfly onto her dress for sentimental reasons. Instead you sew a giant cock and balls on the front and the words Fuck Off Diane! on the back.

The fact that you were doing it for free as a favour and not as part of a contract would cut no ice if she sues you for damages.

Show quote history

😂

OchAyeTheN00 · 22/11/2024 08:53

Lost for words at the bride’s response. I’d forward every single message between you both to the original dress owner and then block them both.

CraverSpud · 22/11/2024 08:55

She could try to sue you but as you have the defence that you were acting in good faith and under instruction from your friend. She perhaps could try suing your friend but I can't see a court getting too excited about alterations to a cheap wedding dress. (Trained in law but never practiced)

SassK · 22/11/2024 08:57

Indulgingmum · 21/11/2024 07:47

Ok I've had a reply from bride.

I was so bloody shocked you cut so much off the bottom!! Who even does that? All you had to do was fold the hem up a bit and put a stitch on it. It didn't matter if it was dragging a bit. I didn't ask you to fix the back seam - you did that to make yourself look good. I will be wearing a cardy so no one will see it. Xxxxx is pissed off at me now so I had to tell her you did it not me. She can fight with you about it. I have enough on my plate with the elopement.

I'm lost for words. She was delighted when she collected the dress that it fit her so well and she said herself the little sash I made from the hem really finished off the dull waistline!

I've blocked them both and I'm going to put this down to experience. Shame on me for falling for a sob story. No wonder people don't help each other out anymore. I hope someone tells her there is no folding hems in wedding dresses. Arrrggghhhh. I'm so annoyed!

I'd send the original owner a screen shot of the text exchange letting her know you did exactly as the second woman asked, and that it was an intricate/expensive alteration you did free of charge out of the goodness of your heart. Do NOT be intimidated by legal threats, it would cost the stupid witch a fortune just to speak to a legal about it.

I'd also be very tempted to add a PS I worked wonders, given the dress was cheap tat.

TheTruthICantSay · 22/11/2024 09:01

Dawevi · 22/11/2024 08:39

It isn't possible to shorten a wedding gown without cutting the excess off. For one they are massively tapered, and the fabric needs a rolled hem (or a cut one for net) which you have to cut it for. Plus this dress needed 7.5 inches off which would be too much to turn up anyway even in a straight skirt.

If the bride had actually told the OP it couldn't be cut then it is possible to lift a dress with bustles, though it changes the look usually, but that isn't usual.

Plus, the bride wanted a sash made with the excess, so she knew it would be cut off!

None of this is the OP's fault at all.

Show quote history

I get that. BUT, as someone who is not a sewer, I can easily see why she didn't think it was necessary. Like I said still not OP's fault at all.

TheCheeseTax · 22/11/2024 09:01

I'm a solicitor and we're lolling at this. Block, ignore.

Projectme · 22/11/2024 09:02

PortiasBiscuit · 22/11/2024 08:29

The one I feel sorry for here is the Bridegroom…

that made me laugh! 😄i was thinking the same!!

What a horrible situation. OP you've been made to feel that you are the one at fault but I can't see how you are. You discussed what was needed with the bride; it was on her to say 'oh no, don't cut anything; the dress is going back to the lender!' But she didn't so how on earth were you supposed to know?

Projectme · 22/11/2024 09:02

TheCheeseTax · 22/11/2024 09:01

I'm a solicitor and we're lolling at this. Block, ignore.

ah start a new thread with ridiculous things people have tried to sue people for!!

tygertygers · 22/11/2024 09:05

growinguptobreakingdown · 21/11/2024 07:56

In your original op you say she asked you to make a waist sash out of the hem so she must have known you were taking that much off.Block her.Sorry you put so much time and effort to be rewarded with this stress.

This!

Sorry your kindness has been repaid in this way OP.

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