Wills with children adopted at birth

[whiteglovetest]

We will be doing wills soon and have 2 children together (married 25 years). DH has another child, now a man in his 30's who he has never met. The mum spilt with DH and she met and married someone else whilst pregnant. The child was adopted by the new man and has his name etc and was raised by him. (DH has never had any contact whatsoever and they ceased CM payments from DH after about 6 months after the child was born). I guess they wanted to cut ties. DH feels a lot of guilt but genuinely wanted the child to grow up in a stable family so just kept away.

So we have found out that he does know that DH is his (biol) father but hasn't tried to make any contact.

So my legal questions are - Does this man have a claim on DH's estate when he dies? Do you we need to include him in any way in the will (to avoid a claim)?

This!
I have a son the same age and as we were not married we were told that his dad had to be at the registration. So your DH would
know if he had needed to give up
paternity and if he were on the BC.

Personally I'd struggle knowing I had a child out there that I had nothing to do with. I'd really struggle writing my will, not leaving them anything.

Would that be the same if you were young and gave up the child for adoption at birth to a loving couple? Just curious. (I realise its not exactly the same at all, just using that example)

Yes, if I'd given birth to them. It's very different for men, I appreciate that.

We've seen here on MN time and again how money left to children is never just about the money. That's why people get so upset if they don't get an equal share - the money represents the way the parent thinks of the child. Or it's often interpreted in that way, anyway.

If a child was formally given up for adoption by the Mother with appropriate court orders etc then any inheritance claim would be removed. The child could though trace their birth parents.

My DH never saw his father from the age of about 2, he has his surname. My DH wouldn’t have taken any money from inheritance even if he were left any, which he obviously wasn’t. One of his relatives told my Mother in Law when he died, even she never gave it a thought that any inheritance would come their way. Whoever you leave your inheritance to is up to you, but if you don’t want the Son to make a claim, a letter should be written to this effect.

This is wrong. There's an automatic claim if the deceased person was a resident of Scotland. Under Scots law, all children are entitled to an equal share of one third of the *moveable estate: that is all children legitimate or illegitimate (hate that expression) plus any adopted by the deceased.

My understanding is that if the child has been adopted by someone else, then there's no claim

Children have 20 yrs in which to make a claim.

(I live in Scotland have been executor for three estates.)

*Money, jewellery, cars... Not the house.

Sorry - I missed your comment before I replied.

Not many people just leave their child and assume the child’s adopted, don’t find out if there’s any PR until they are writing a will 30 years later. They would go through the lotions of having PR removed.

Apart from the small amounts of babies abandoned at birth, most people just walk away and assume someone has sorted out all the rest.

Most people also wouldn’t ignore a letter from the adopted mother updating them on the, now adult, child.

Yep I was thinking that for the legal aspect.

On an ethical pov, that’s different.

Order a copy of the child’s birth certificate, if he was adopted it will probably be noted on there. However if in doubt at all then put in the Will that he is not to inherit because he’s never had any contact.

It's rare for adult children to be able to make a claim on their parents estate in England and Wales. That's even more so if they were in no way dependent on them. There is a recent ish case where a woman successfully claimed on her parents estate because she was largely destitute but that's a very rare win in a complex and costly scenario.

What's the main reason for your question?

Your DH wasn’t on the birth certificate as he could only have done that if present at the registrars office. And if she was married at the time the husband goes on the birth certificate whether the genetic father or not. So his son wasn’t adopted, he was never “his” on the birth certificate. He would have been involved in court proceedings if any adoption took place. Which it didn’t need to as husband is down as father.

Yoir can have two biological kids and leave everything to one of you want to. No one has an automatic claim.

I’m afraid this is wrong. Someone has already explained the Scottish position. In England and Wales you are free to leave your estate to whoever you choose but a child is automatically entitled to make a claim against the estate if they haven’t been reasonably provided for, under the Inheritance (Provision for Family and Dependants) Act.
For the OP - IF the child has been adopted they are no longer legally your OH’s child and therefore have no claim. However, if the child hasn’t been adopted - and has just taken the stepfather’s name - then they could still potentially have a claim. If that is the case you should take legal advice when preparing wills.

someone will correct me if I’m wrong, but you can get a copy of a birth certificate for a small fee. Presumably he knows the date and place of birth?

Very similar situation- all DC have equal shares in will. Might be different if formal adoption to 'new' parents had taken place, hut it hadn't. We now have contact.

This is your answer OP.

Do you find it hard to respect you husband knowing he can just walk away from a child. Guess he has capacity to again. Although no doubt he will say he was young and different now

Ok I’m old now but I was born to a single young girl in the 1950’s.

My father was from a wealthy Irish family who rushed him back home once they discovered I was on the way.

My mother married when I was 4 and unfortunately allowed her husband to adopt me for financial reasons. (I was then ceremoniously dumped on my gp’s
but that’s a whole other story)

Reading between the lines OP I would just carry on as you are. If the guy has found about about your DH and not tried to make contact then seems to me he is perfectly happy in his own family situation. Why rock the boat? I didn’t inherit from anyone - nothing to inherit from my mother but we lost contact years ago anyway - but certainly wouldn’t have expected anything from my father. He never tried to contact me, which he could have done easily, he never had any more dc although I did hear he married an equally wealthy lady much older than him eventually. Maybe I am just quite hard but I think just leave well alone. Any approach or keepsake from your DH may not be welcome.

This x 100.
How sad that you’re looking to exclude his child from his inheritance. Unless I’ve misunderstood your intentions and the point of your post?

What does dh want to do? Might be nice to leave him something, surely?
But as long as dh leaves a will, I doubt there would be grounds to challenge it.

I'm not in the UK, so this is not an advice, just a mixture of curiosity and clarification.

You can order a copy of anyone else's birth certificate in the UK? Even if you have no connection to that person?

Second question, what was the base for paying those 6 months of child maintenance? Verbal agreement or something official?

Third question, so his EX had already been re-married when the child was born?

In my country if the child is born up to 9 months after divorce and there isn't new marriage in the meantime, the ex-husband is automatically assumed as father, if new marriage happens in time, new husband is automatically assumed as the father.

It sounds to me, that if they were married when the child was born, husband would be automatically marked as a father and no adoption would be needed. I just don't know, why would the child maintenance be paid for half a year.

Do you have access to a legal helpline on your home insurance? Check your policy (many do include it).
I discovered that my policy does, and honestly, it's been a lifeline. I've had to phone several times about my (different) issue, and they've been so helpful.

Yours is the kind of issue that they could almost certainly clear up for you, and if you're covered, it won't cost you a penny

What do you mean by “they ceased CM payments?”

Did the mum write and say that DH should stop transferring her money? Or were the payments being taken by eg government deduction?