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Original poster

Contesting a non-molestation order

27 replies

alittlequinnie · 22/02/2024 19:27

Hi there - wondering if anybody can help me.

I'm helping a friend - his ex-wife has served an application for a non-molestation order. There's a hearing listed 7th March - 5 minute listing time.

She's given a witness statement and it says if he wants to contest it he has to serve a witness statement at least 2 days before hearing.

She's got solicitors - he's got - well, me.

I'm presuming I have to send witness statement to the Court and her Solicitors? Is that right?

Also there's no exhibits to her witness statement so presuming I don't need them on mine - but she has referred to text messages and quoted them - if I do the same (the whole thing is he says/she says) then I just need to make sure I have copies of the texts in case I need to produce them?

As the hearing is only 5 mins - I'm presuming the Judge will read papers before - and make a decision on whether or not to set aside the non-mol or grant it?

I appreciate it's probably more likely people on Mumsnet will have experience of applying for the non-mol than defending it - but any help would be appreciated!

Thank you so much!

OP posts:
Karensalright · 22/02/2024 20:01

Not a lawyer, experienced DV advisor. Sounds like an application for a temporary order, so an application for a full order might follow.

He has to say why he is contesting the application, in his statement. The court has to evaluate risks to the applicant on the balance of probabilities. Text messages are evidence of threats (or lack of)

As is the applicants testimony to what fear and risk your friend might have caused to her. This includes risks of emotional harm (coercive control)

Not clear why you are involving yourself. He needs a solicitor.

Twoshoesnewshoes · 22/02/2024 20:03

Why does it need to be challenged? The non mol will usually specify no contact and not being within a certain distance of her or her home. Is this a problem?

MotherofChaosandDestruction · 22/02/2024 20:05

Why is he contesting? Does her application have any validity, as in, she is fearful of him? He needs a solicitor if it's completely without merit and malicious to affect child arrangement hearings. If it's not, he just needs to not contact her and stay away.

Whiskeypowers · 22/02/2024 20:09

What are you not telling us here?

PotteringAlonggotkickedoutandhadtoreregister · 22/02/2024 20:10

Why is he contesting it?

MiltonNorthern · 22/02/2024 20:11

Why are you helping a man contest a non molestation order?

Imstillawake · 22/02/2024 20:13

Thats the thing with non mols, if you leave the person who has stated they want to be left alone, alone then nothing happens. She has stated she wants to be left alone, so just advise him to do that.

Sauvblanctime · 22/02/2024 20:15

People don’t just apply for them on the willy nilly..

fatphalange · 22/02/2024 20:16

Think very carefully here, OP. As well as her witness statement, the ex will have provided sufficient robust evidence of the need for it. Police reports etc. It's not a case of he said/she said.
What he would be strongly advised to do is to accept an undertaking- this means in layman's terms that of course he will abide by no contact as he refutes the requirement for the order to begin with.
I think you yourself should consider legal advice so you're fully aware of what exactly this process involves. If you want to proceed in this.

CadyEastman · 22/02/2024 20:28

If you're in any kind of relationship with him, I'd recommend using Claire's Law to see if he has any history of DV.

Agree with other PPs that his ex would need done pretty robust evidence and you need to think carefully. Also agree that he needs to get legal advice if she is sure that there is no need for a non-mol.

tinydancer88 · 22/02/2024 20:33

Why can he not accept that she doesn’t want him to contact her, threaten her or turn up at her property?

ARMSDOWN · 22/02/2024 20:33

As much as people claim, the courts don't just hand out non mols like candy. You have to have evidence. I've seen plenty denied due to no evidence. How does be contest it? He tells the truth and relies on a lack of evidence. If there is evidence then the non mol is justified.

Branleuse · 22/02/2024 20:54

Why does he want to be in contact with her so much?
Why are you getting involved? I'd back away, seriously.

Original poster
alittlequinnie · 23/02/2024 08:41

Thank you all!

To clarify - they do have small children and she keeps denying him contact - she's blocked his number so he can't arrange to see.

I think trying to make arrangements without even being able to text her would be pretty difficult? I think that's his main reason.

As far as I can see she's put her side and now I just wanted to help him put his side and the Court can decide. If it goes ahead so be it.

They went to mediation and she went against the signed mediation agreement so he can't see children.

He can't afford a Solicitor is on UC.

I'm not in a relationship with him!

My understanding is that if he does nothing and lets the Non-Mol go ahead then it will come up on any DBS checks which I presume will make gaining employment difficult for him in future? He's only been out of work a few months so wants to get back into full time work.

Thank you all again.

OP posts:
MiltonNorthern · 23/02/2024 09:09

He doesn't need a solicitor to apply to court. He will even be exempt from the application fee. Whatever the wrongs or rights of her stopping contact if he has chosen to harass her instead of applying to court he has been very stupid. That's the best possible interpretation of his behaviour I think. More likely that she has good reasons for applying for a non mol.

ARMSDOWN · 23/02/2024 09:13

alittlequinnie · 23/02/2024 08:41

Thank you all!

To clarify - they do have small children and she keeps denying him contact - she's blocked his number so he can't arrange to see.

I think trying to make arrangements without even being able to text her would be pretty difficult? I think that's his main reason.

As far as I can see she's put her side and now I just wanted to help him put his side and the Court can decide. If it goes ahead so be it.

They went to mediation and she went against the signed mediation agreement so he can't see children.

He can't afford a Solicitor is on UC.

I'm not in a relationship with him!

My understanding is that if he does nothing and lets the Non-Mol go ahead then it will come up on any DBS checks which I presume will make gaining employment difficult for him in future? He's only been out of work a few months so wants to get back into full time work.

Thank you all again.

So I'm assuming he's applied to the court for a child arrangements order?

fatphalange · 23/02/2024 12:34

Oh right, I see. Another man not happy to go down the proper route to see his children. Is happy to make excuses about not being able to afford jt (obviously hasn't looked into jt cos he actually can) but thinks he can easily afford a proper, expert route to contest a non-mol order (which is what he would need to succeed)

pastypirate · 23/02/2024 12:46

Afaik a non mol is a civil order as opposed to a criminal conviction and does not show on a DBS. Also they are initially time limited. (If this is incorrect I apologise)

I don't see how a non mol will even help this man as he needs a child arrangement order.

Contact can be arranged through a 3rd party. If mum doesn't respond to this then it's a child arrangement order route he needs to take.

I do recall on mols being granted ex parte especially the interim orders.

I hope the exw is ok and safe.

MotherofChaosandDestruction · 23/02/2024 14:24

Why has she applied? What is her side of the story? Has she got evidence?

He can apply through the courts for contact and arrange through a third party if the no mol order is granted. Is there a reason why she's denied contact?

prh47bridge · 23/02/2024 15:43

My understanding is that if he does nothing and lets the Non-Mol go ahead then it will come up on any DBS checks

No, it won't. It is not a criminal conviction.

Yes, any witness statement should be sent to the court and her solicitors.

CadyEastman · 23/02/2024 15:45

As others have said, a Non-Mol is a civil order which shouldn't show on his DBS so he can't contest it on the grounds that it will affect his employment.

He also can't contest it in the grounds that it will stop him seeing his DC as arrangements can be made through a third party. He does not need to see or communicate with her in any way to see his DC.

So he can't contest it on those grounds and it would be foolish to try.

He can contest it on the grounds that the allegations aren't true but she's probably already had a Judge look at the evidence and seen that she may have grounds for the order. That doesn't mean that she will automatically get the non-lol but he's not telling you that he's not harassed her is he?

How is application for a Child Arrangements Order progressing?

prh47bridge · 23/02/2024 15:45

fatphalange · 23/02/2024 12:34

Oh right, I see. Another man not happy to go down the proper route to see his children. Is happy to make excuses about not being able to afford jt (obviously hasn't looked into jt cos he actually can) but thinks he can easily afford a proper, expert route to contest a non-mol order (which is what he would need to succeed)

Where does OP say that? She says there was a signed mediation agreement and the mother is not complying with that agreement. It sounds like the agreement included contact with his children, so he has already been down the proper route. And OP clearly states he can't afford a solicitor to contest the non-mol. But don't let the facts get in the way of your prejudices.

fatphalange · 23/02/2024 17:19

@prh47bridge where does she say that? Well she made a post about a man wanting to contest a non-molestation order. Not asking for advice about what steps he should take to get contact with his kids.
And he will need an expertly put together set of points with evidence to refute each instance of evidence his ex has put forward in her witness statement, this could cost. An order to set the wheels in motion for contact with his children is cheap enough. This guy's priority is to 'fight' for the right to keep contacting his ex. Facts.

Karensalright · 23/02/2024 17:37

@fatphalange Second post from OP clearly states they had a signed mediation agreement that the mother is ignoring.

We dont know all the details, but it is the mans right to contest a non mol application if it is untrue or a guise to prevent child contact

Dont know why you are venting as this enquiry has nothing to do with whatever difficulties you may or may not have been through.

fatphalange · 23/02/2024 18:26

@Karensalright yes, I read what the OP has said. The father should pour his energies into getting an order for contact but he has made his priorities clear.
My advice in my first post was from knowledge because of my line of work :) it was the reason I clicked on the thread. Nice try.

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