Partner threatening me with police and fraud

[Dawny1879]

Sorry if this is a naive question....

My ex partner and I are in Scotland. We cohabitat, but everything is in my name. He gives me £600 a month (less than the mortgage and /or the childcare alone and less that a third of what I pay out each month). I pay all the bills, majority of food shops, car, childcare, all childrens stuff, birthdays, Christmas etc. He works three days a week (entirely his choice) and takes the children reluctantly on the other days. We have a 1 year old and 4 year old. My family gave me the deposit for the house.

We are in the process of splitting up and today he did his first mediation call and is now threatening me with fraud and potential loss of my job because I said that I don't have a lump sum of money to give him to move out and because I said I don't think he is entitled to anything. He is claiming economic disadvantage because I said earlier in the relationship, that if he sorted out his finances then eventually I would put him on the mortgage. He has never sorted out his finances and I could never put him on the mortgage. He is on a waiting list for a council house, but is still at my property.

Can he get me done for fraud because I don't have anything to give? For context I am just back from maternity leave (which I used all my savings for). I am happy for him to take any furniture etc, but I don't loads of savings to give him. He is implying that any savings I have are his.

Sorry if it is a frantic post, but I am panicking.

He has nowhere to go? Ah Diddums! Can't the 'ickle baby boy find a little place to live?

It's not your problem!

Some of the responses on this thread are based on the law in England. In Scotland, unmarried cohabitants can make financial claims against their ex partner. He may, therefore, be entitled to something, contrary to what some posters have said. Disregard the talk of fraud and threats of calling in the police. He won't get anywhere with that. But you need proper legal advice.

Thank you @prh47bridge this is what I was worried about. Currently preparing a timeline as I carried us financially whilst he was a student for four years and whilst he was unemployed. He was only really been working since Jan 2021. Once I have my timeline, I will get legal advice.

This in theory- he is claiming economic disadvantage but to prove this he was have to prove he has suffered a financial loss by living with her, which from what OP has said - he has not.
if he was not living with her he would have still been paying rent, bills and other living expenses and arguably be paying maintenance to her or be paying half the nursery bill if 50/50 parental split.
what loss has he suffered. He is in no worse of a financial position living with her working part time than if he was living on his own working part time.

He's talking complete bollocks. I could give a lengthy legal argument why but it's bollocks of such a great magnitude that I can't be bothered.

He's talking of a section 28 claim (Scots cohabitation law) -.which must be made exactly within a year of separation.

You definitely need legal advice & it will cost £300ish an hour.

My cohabitation claim legal fees were 10K.

The fraud bit is certainly complete bollocks, but this is in Scotland where unmarried cohabitants have more rights in some situations. He may therefore have a claim against OP. However, I don't know enough Scottish law to say for certain whether he does have a claim.

@RoséProsecco thank you for your reply. I sought legal advice through my works Employee Assistance Programme and they advised that he could have a claim against me, but it would be at the judges discretion. They advised that I get in contact with mediation in the first instance.

I am trawling through bank statements and making a note of what he gave me each month (as there has been many, many months where he hasn't contributed anything especially when he was a student and unemployed). I am also preparing a list of bills (excluding the mortgage) which shows that the amount he contributes doesn't even cover half the bills ....and he would have to pay these if he had his own place anyway. I can't really prove that he said he only wanted to work 3 days, but all the jobs he has ever applied for have been part time.

I am then going to figure out how many months he had one of the kids on the days I was working and put a cost beside that. Then atleast when we go to mediation I will have the facts. Anything else I should be thinking of?

I honestly was so naive hoping for an amicable separation and less than two weeks into this, he is telling anyone that will listen that I have been financially abusing him...when it is just not the case. 😓 not sure how we can recover from this.

I was talking about the fraud, which I assumed was the main thing worrying the OP. Sorry I should have been more clear.

@RoséProsecco that bill is scary. Were you advised to enter into mediation in the first instance?

I don't have anywhere close to £10k, since my mat leave I haven't even amassed a month's worth of savings yet. I am not sure what he is expecting from me. Anything he takes is ruining the security for the kids 😓

I work in Fraud/Financial Crime... nothing you have said on here so far sounds like you have committed any kind of fraud against him. Fraud in a nutshell is an act of deception in order to obtain personal or financial gain - I wonder what he thinks you have done that amounts to 'fraud'. What on earth. To be honest it just sounds like he is clutching at straws and trying to frighten you into doing what he wants. Sadly it is people like him that waste police and other organisations time and resources with false claims that could be spent allocated on genuine cases.

Can't really comment on the legal side of things particularly as you are in Scotland so it's a bit out of my realm but as other people have said definitely seek proper legal advice if you can!

There is not a lot of case law on section 28 claims so it is very difficult to say what the outcome would be
But people saying he has no claim are simply wrong

@Dawny1879 - we did try solicitor-led mediation but it was a waste of time & money as he didn't really engage with the process & just used it as an opportunity to lie, manipulate & gaslight.

As others have said, the case law on section 28 claims is a grey area. You can looks up the Scottish courts judgments pages to see some examples.

His solicitor will have told him the best case scenario, and yours will do the same. The answer is in the middle & you have to negotiate that between you. You can pay solicitors to do that (for £300/hr or more) or try yourselves. That's how lawyers make their money - it very rarely goes to court (unless you qualify for legal aid).

When was your exact date of separation? You or him have 1 year to issue the writs from then. It might be in your best interest to delay beyond that.

There is legal aid available in Scotland in family law cases so please apply, the worst that can happen is that they say no.

I think the worry would be that the ex qualifies for legal aid & OP doesn't.

You'll also need the current value of your home, how much it has increased in equity during cohabitation& how much you have paid in mortgage v him - was it a joint account the payments came out of?

You may also need a CETV for your pension of the cohabitation period.