Has anyone done the REMO route for child maintenance?

[Legaldispair]

So my ex husband is suppose to pay child maintenance, paid the minimum for a few years and last year I noticed CMS were using old information to work out what he should pay me as his salary had trebled and they have never recalculated, to cut a long story short I have a hearing soon about this as he continued to dispute it and HE took it to tribunal. THEN on top of that he moved to New York… has always threatened it, and has paid nothing for a year as he ‘doesn’t know what he is supposed to pay as there are no rules’ due to the fact him and myself are both UK citizens. Not even paying a contribution amount and not even bothering to look into it so I have had no choice but to go down the REMO route. Those papers have only just gone off to then as it took 6 months just to get these papers (CMS were dicking around in the mean time and not helping with this) so he owes me aLOT of money in under payments which I know America won’t be interested in and he hasn’t paid me for a year… has anyone actually had any success with the Remo route? I’m slowly running out of any positivity. I can’t afford legal help so I’m on my own.

can anyone share this experiences with me please? Anything I need to know that they don’t tell you etc?

Well I know where my ex works as it’s one of the biggest American companies and he is plastered all over social media to where he works and even his (very high up) job position. The letter basically said they had done all they can, they have passed it onto the American court system and that I shouldn’t expect to hear anything for at least 3 months and not to chase them before then and that it’s a very hard thing to do and basically literally they will do all they can but that’s it.. sorry I can’t remember word for word and I’m not sure where I put the letter as it was that useless!

Thanks for replying. So they've basically said to sit tight and wait? I suppose that's better than saying you've got no chance of getting anything! I'm in a similar position as you, my ex is American, I actually broke off our engagement due to emotional and financial abuse, right at the end of the relationship he refused point blank to pay anything for our children because I chose to leave him so I should deal with it! Like your ex, he's on a 6 figure salary, and one of my children has SN. It's so stressful isn't it?

@Serrina yep same, mine also are disabled! He was on crazy money when he lived here, so will be on even more over there (same company).
yes that is the jist of it, I put the paperwork in 4th jan and it has only just this month been processed and sent to America… who know what will happen the other end, if anything. I do know though that (as PP said) they are so much hotter in America about non paying parents than our pathetic system… but I don’t know how that applies to a UK citizen living over there..

@Legaldispair Yes, your paperwork goes to court in the state where your ex is living and a judge there will make a decision as to the amount of child maintenance that is to be paid. I might have said previously that some states will take unpaid arrears into consideration for up to a year, but others won't. I've also heard that some states work incredibly quickly once your paperwork has arrived. An that unpaid child maintenance is taken very seriously, so I can't imagine your ex stands a chance of getting out of paying.

I personally don't think REMO should be expressing any opinions as it's up to the judge who presides over your case to do that. REMO is only a 'handling agent' and is only there to process your paperwork. I wish they did more, but unfortunately they aren't resourced to. You do feel that your paperwork just goes into a big black hole and you have no idea if it'll every come back to you. The good news is that it is now in the states and hopefully they'll be much faster than REMO.

@Legaldispair It doesn't matter what citizenship he has, if he is living in the US he must abide by their laws whilst living there. He's gone to the wrong country to not pay child maintenance. If he doesn't pay up, it'll be taken from his salary.

@Sunchi the problem is I know what he will do, he will just keep moving states just to make it harder to find him. I have nothing to give them apart from name, dob, and the employer he works for and his job title… no phone numbers as he got rid of that, no forwarding address.

@Legaldispair Every case will have a case number and you should receive copies of letters/emails from the NY organisation that is dealing with your case. Maybe you haven't received that yet? So, you would be able to get in touch with them yourself (even though REMO don't like it and the NY org may object) and ask for an update on your case.

I know of a number of people who have just gone straight to these organisations as the REMO process is so long winded and there is such a lack of communication. I did this myself and got immediate responses from the Swedish organisation that was dealing with my case. It will put your mind at rest that something is happening.

@Legaldispair did you have to provide photos of your ex and type a statement outlining your relationship? I had to.

@Sunchi would it speed things up if I've given REMO all his information? Like currently address, phone numbers, email, work address and even his social security number? Surely it would as this means they don't have to spend time trying to find him?

@Serrina yes to a statement but I didn’t have a photo and couldn’t print anything off the internet. I did say he is all over social media etc with his face… I think the only way they would find him is going to the very large employer…. No other way. I don’t know how helpful said employer will be though. He’s quite high up.

does anyone know how I could ever get the back payment he owes me? It’s a lot of money… it’s under payments back dating from I think 2018 although it was CMS fault as they fucked up and we’re using an old wage and when I questioned it they said it was right, then after 2 renewals I said no this is wrong, it go recalculated via hmrc and be of course kept asking for mandatory reconsideration which meant another year of under payments. Then decided to move to US (he always threatened that telling me he wouldn’t have to pay anything if he moved there) so I know he will continue to do what he can to not pay. That money is massive to me, it would be life changing for me and DC as I could use it for a much needed deposit for a mortgage… literally life changing

@Legaldispair unfortunately I don't know too much about the CMS as I've never dealt with them but if it's any help, I've heard that the US authorities have been known to deliver legal documentation by hand to people at their work - literally to their desk!! So hopefully if he doesn't respond they should be able to get it to them, or they will directly contact the payroll department of the company and deduct it straight from his salary.

Hope it works out for everyone.

@Serrina Yes, give REMO everything you have on him - name, address, where he works, photo, social security number, passport photo. The more you can give them on this the better.

@Legaldispair I have no idea if you will ever be able to get the money back. I'm not legally trained. However, as he has now moved to the US, I would imagine that you would have to bring a case against him yourself via the US courts, which would be costly. I imagine you could take him to court here, but once again, you would be paying. My ex owed me money - not child maintenance - and the only way to get that back would have been to take him to court.

You could try contacting Rights of Women or SPSAS, to get some free legal advice on this.

@Sunchi Rights of Women wouldn't help when I contacted them about this. Nobody could help, not the Law Centre, not citizens advice, not even the solicitors I contacted would help. They all said they didn't know anything about the REMO process so they wouldn't be able to help me with it.

@Legaldispair Yes, that doesn't surprise me. What I was referring to are the child maintenance payments you didn't receive whilst your ex was in the UK and you were going through CMS. Those payments are unlikely to be enforced in the US - unless once your paperwork gets to the NY organisation and they are willing to enforce the arrears. I've heard some are willing to take into consideration arrears of up to a year.

This is false. You do not need a court order for Remo to then chase. You go direct to Remo.

If the ex states that he is habitual resident in 2 countries and CMS do not wish to close the case and REMO enforced the order from UK will be need pay 2 CMS? From each country? That what CMS told me not taking as a evidence enforcement from Canada court.

You can't claim both as your main residence?

Well i gry say that to CMS and they still do nit want glosę the całe even through Canadian Court gave my ex enforcement order. I show that to CMS as he appeals in Canada that he only should pay what CMS is calculate and they seems to agree.

can he live in Canada as the Canadian Court give him reinforcement of U.K. order and have have wife there pay tax there as well as in U.K. from his fake company where is earn 10000 per year?

or if he is there earn there and pay taxes there as well as pay tax here so he will have 2 Child Maintenances?

@Mummyofj
As has been mentioned before, CMS has jurisdiction in the UK only; REMO will work with the Canadian authority to enforce child maintenance through the court system in Canada.

I'm not clear on what your question is. Surely, his residency status and where he pays tax is more likely to be an immigration matter? I'm not sure how this would affect his ability to pay child maintenance in Canada?

Hey OP

Thanks for making this post! I’d love it if you kept us updated. Applied a couple of weeks ago myself after no maintenance for several years.

Do we have to get a solicitor if ex contests the amount put down on the REMO forms? Xxx

Mine was sent to the other country (Spain) in March 2022, and no updates whatsoever since then… I’ll post here if/when I get an update.

I don’t think you’ll need a solicitor if it comes to that, as the state solicitor in the other country should represent you (as far as I understand). I have represented myself on family court twice, and it went well. You can always get advice/support from a McKenzie friend.

Thanks! Really appreciated. Why has it taken so long for you to get a reply? Did you have your ex’s address? Mine is going to USA, I have his address but nothing further. The mckenzie friend didn’t have much info about REMO so I’m glad for these posts!!!

I don’t know why it’s taking so long. I assumed it may take many years for a resolution. I have got his address and all his contact details, and a Spanish court order that includes the child maintenance agreement, so my case should be straightforward. The REMO application was relatively easy, and after a few months I got a letter saying it was all being sent to REMO unit in London, to forward it to Spain. But that was that, nothing since (about 17 months now). REMO hasn’t replied to my emails requesting an update. I have also trying contacting the relevant authorities in Spain too, but no reply. So I can only hope that someone is on the case.