Grandparents Court Order

[Juststopamoment]

My ex died. We’d been separated for a number of years when he died. The children weren’t seeing him bar a couple I visits I supervised because of his mental health and addiction issues. After he died the paternal grandparents got access to see the children despite there being a non molestation order against the grandmother and a restraining order against their son, the childrens father. Also despite there being parental alienation by the grandmother towards me. My eldest is nearly 12 and youngest 10 and both want to reduce the number of visits. At the moment it’s 8 visits and year and 6 Zoom calls a year. They want to halve it. Will the court take on board their opinions now? As a single parent I have very little money. There is no financial help at all from the paternal family. What would be the cheapest way of doing this if the grandparents don’t agree? Thanks.

That’s what I’m assuming.

Op

If this contact has been awarded legally then you should think twice about trying to interfere in that process.

You have stated why you don’t like these people however that does not mean these people are having a harmful, detrimental impact on your children’s lives. They are the connection between their birth father and his side of the family.

You have said the children don’t want to go when it is 8 TIMES a year. You have said this is due to teen socialising getting in the way but surely the benefit of this relationship outweighs the benefits of hanging out with friends 8 TIMES a year?

I would not give this headspace. It has been ordered. Tell the children that and stick to it unless there is a genuine risk of harm to your children.

@Juststopamoment

Does out of court mean between solicitors during the hearing? Then yes that’s what happened.

Was the agreement then made into a court order? If it wasn't, you can do whatever you want regarding contact. If it was, you can go back to court and ask for the order to be varied. The courts will take your children's wishes into account. Your older child's wishes will carry more weight than your younger child's.

Quitelikeit I don’t think it can ever be assumed that because they are grandparents they will automatically be a good influence on the children. The grandmother has continuously shown me that she has serious mental health problems and she passed those onto her son. I don’t trust them at all with my children. Who would when she tried to alienate my then 3 year old son from me. You can’t always assume a father is going to be a good influence on their child so why grandparents? Especially when you have proof that they continuously put their reputation and ahead of the children. But the main concern here is that the children don’t want to see them. My younger son doesn’t want to see them at all but he may have to continue to see them for many years.

Yes I hear you but I suspect if it is court ordered that the contact schedule was thought out thoroughly by the necessary persons and they reached their conclusion with all of the above information available.

I absolutely understand that you might not like these people.

Ph47 has given relevant legal information

Spookily DB is in a very similar position.
His ex is out of the picture (alcoholic and seriously mentally unwell) however the GPs are pushing for a court hearing to formalise their contact with the DC.

Thus far there has been a monthly visit (2 nights) and weekly calls. DB wants this visits reduced to school holidays only as the DC have many social commitments (plus but keen in going) but GPs refusing to budge.
The DC are 12 and 10 and it's a 6 hour round trip.

All very acrimonious and many ongoing safeguarding concerns. DB has been more than reasonable.

Frankly I think it's ridiculous that it's even going to court and suspect that ££££ are figuring heavily in the solicitors thinking

Forafriend123 that is spookily similar. The grandparents live 3 hours away from us and the grandad drives and is in his late 70s so yes it’s frightening. I could have let it continue but the kids don’t want to go. I think we might be able to drag it out for another year but there are real grumbles. I don’t see why teenagers should be forced to see GPs. They are definitely using it to their advantage as it would naturally tail off but this way they are forced to see them until they are 16.