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Legal matters

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you have any legal concerns we suggest you consult a solicitor.

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Original poster

dh been accused of something he didnt do- need advice/hand holding

42 replies

sillyily · 04/01/2014 21:45

I'm not sure what I'm allowed to say so I'll ask my question first and if someone can telk me whether I can give all the info then I will below....

basically dh has been done for something he has no way done. a ton of evidence supporting him yet he cant remember (he was drunk and is alcohol induced epileptic which causes memory loss -it was his stag btw he doesnt make a habit of drinking) he has 12 statements that all say same thing etc

it has somehow got as far as the preliminary hearing on thursday... I have a few questions about this...

is there any way this hearing will decide that there is no case and drop it?

will there be reporters there? someone told us there will... can they use his name if he hasnt been proven guilty?

what actually happens at this hearing? how long does it last?

any enlightenment greatly appreciated as im worried sick, we dont know the system at all, where as the accuser is very familiar with it all.

tia

OP posts:

chocolatespiders · 04/01/2014 23:46

Has he ever been arrested before?

Original poster

sillyily · 04/01/2014 23:47

there are statements against him. the gf and two of her friends.

there is a lot more to this but I did make a point of saying it was going to be vague so as to not out me.

I know dh has told me everythung. my brother was there too and my cousin so on the off chance he had lied I know they would tell me.

anyway, came on here for reassurance and now feel really shitty so obviously wasnt the best idea.

thanks for your replies.

OP posts:

Original poster

sillyily · 04/01/2014 23:48

no trouble before... he is a little quiet choir boy type. the accuser is... not...

anyway I promised dh last message was my last! thanks again

OP posts:

ladyjulian · 04/01/2014 23:50

Speak to the solicitor on Monday, and I hope it goes okay on Thursday - first hearings are mostly administrative and not too scary.

You don't have any obligation to satisfy people's curiosity as to the exact charge or his defence.

Juno77 · 04/01/2014 23:50

I'm assuming someone was attacked. A male, it seems, and they are accusing your DH of being the attacker.

His claim is that he blacked out and can't remember.

His friends say he didn't do it.

There must be some physical evidence to suggest the victim was attacked, so why are they blaming your DH?

beeny · 04/01/2014 23:51

I am a barrister and think from the little information you have posted you get a solicitor.

ParenthoodJourney · 04/01/2014 23:52

Sillyily don't feel that way this is a tough time for you and your family don't let people who haven't had experience with this situation, support or any sound legal advice make you feel shitty. I hope most of your questions are answered on Monday and things go well for you guys. My DP had a lot against him but I knew he was telling me the truth and that he didn't deserve what he was going through only you know your DH.

Juno77 · 04/01/2014 23:57

Good luck for Monday.

I used to work as a defence lawyer (not in England) so I was only asking because I've seen countless partners who blindly believe their accused partner of telling the absolute truth, only for them to then admit they've lied. It's more common that anything else, actually.

I'm not suggesting this is the case. But it is the case so often, that when something doesn't add up, it probably isn't true.

But, I don't know the facts here so I would suggest him getting a solicitor ASAP. Good luck.

RhondaJean · 05/01/2014 00:02

I was asking because actually I do have experience of supporting people with similar situations and I would prefer the op to be aware she may not have the full story - if her DH was blacked out he may not know it himself. If he hasn't previously been involved in things like this, that's good and will count for him.

If you are still reading though, please don't feel shitty, there's absolutely nothing you have done to cause this situation.

RedHelenB · 05/01/2014 08:50

If you husband didn't do it does your brother know who did? It would be unlikely that it would get so far just on the say so of one person. If it was a general brawl type thing then obviously it is harder to detangle! really though, should your dh drink if it induces epilepsy, seems a really dangerous thing to do!

RedHelenB · 05/01/2014 08:54

As to the reporting, it will probably not be that big a story so even if it is in the papers I bet most people won't read about it. It will get sorted out & hopefully things will be clearer after he's discussed it with his solicitor.

Original poster

sillyily · 05/01/2014 12:21

Thanks all for you replies again. Feeling more positive this morning!

No he shouldn't drink- he normally drinks once a year ish and this occasion was his stag so ubfortunatley felt the pressure. He had about 6 pints. If it were me I would be fine after that, but since he doesn't drink and he weighs 11 stone at 6'1" it obviously affected him a lot. At least I know that I don't need to worry about him drinking too much now lol he didn't even drink at wedding/Xmas/nye.

OP posts:

Original poster

sillyily · 05/01/2014 12:23

As for the reporting, the reason I asked is his boss phones last night to say it might get in paper and we live in a tigh knit community where everyone knows everyone so wouldn't be ideal. But hey ho. Not much we can do.

OP posts:

Original poster

sillyily · 05/01/2014 12:45

The epilepsy is controlled so he can have a couple of drinks and be fine as long as he takes his medication. However the police wouldn't give him his medication despite them coming to the house to collect it and me repeating over and over that he must take it. He then had a seizure and also an attack relating to his heart condition (not related to alcohol but related to the stress and lack of food as they wouldn't let him eat in the station..?!). Which resulted in him being rushed into hospital. But that's another story..

OP posts:

RedHelenB · 05/01/2014 12:49

yes but he drank 6 pints and was unconscious - I think it inevitable he ended up in hospital as most medication is not suitable to take with huge amounts of alcohol!

Juno77 · 05/01/2014 13:46

How was he unconscious though?

First you said he had alcohol induced epilepsy which caused memory loss, then you said he was knocked unconscious during the incident?

I fear you don't know the full story here.

Greenkit · 07/01/2014 15:12

sillyily

He would have been taken into custody and risk assessed, he would have been asked if he had any medical issues. He would then have been put down to see the nurse as he is epileptic and if officers had come to the house and taken medicaction he would have been given it as long as it was boxed and labled with his name and the tablets were in date.

He would have also been offered food and drink, but may have declined.

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