THIRD party uploading photographs of my child on social networks. information/advice please??

[AMummyFromNotts]

Hello
I sent my ex partner a few photographs of my child nothing was intended other than just showing him how much she has grown.

I then see these photographs passed on to his mother which she has posted all over fb without my permission or even any acknowledgement from ex they have been passed on in the first place at all.
Second of all it been done publicly and there no privacy settings provided.So there all sorts of people who can view these photographs or even worst copy and paste them .The manner they have been shared just makes this even worst and personally just shows lack of respect.

There also a numTber of comments from unknown people that i personal don't know or are any relation to my child whatsoever.

third of all the child is under the age of 16 and we talking around 8ish months here

1. Legally the father doesn't ottained any PR rights to approve to any of this behaviour.

tbh before i had my child i used to think why people where so touchy about this kind of stuff .
But when you stumble across photographs of your child without any indication of them being in the view of the public and not even asked beforehand was just shocking and the lack of care in the way they have been posted just makes me more annoyed!!

All these photographs was directly took by myself and i never expected them a week later to be uploaded on a soical network site by someone i never gave them to in the first place.(I blocked her from acessing my fb so whilst browsing with mates somewhow i stumble across them accidently tbh so it was a complete shock.)

His mother doesn't have a realtionship with my child so it not even a case of that .Not going into the details about how this come about .
She aware i particuly don't like her/anybody uploading photographs of my child before it even came to none speaking terms.
In the past i have got a photograph removed but they are just then uploaded again 5mins later even worst without my consent/permission again.
I am not going to continue to waste my time filling out copy right forms for them to just be ignored.

And as a mother i am funny about uploading photographs of myself close relative and my child and if i do they are limited to who can view these so it not even a case of that i do it and expect no1 else to.
these photographs haven't even been uploaded on my own profile they was intended to be on my phone and for personal/family memories pretty much.
I have no problem with her having photographs of my child on her phone etc but when they are uploaded on social networks without my approval it a different story.

I don't know if this is far fetch but is this a police matter? could i report my findings to a police officer who can warn her to remove any existing photographs?As it clearly obvious she continues to ignored what i say and the social network removal policy.

I sent the photographs mainly because he hadn't seen her for ages and i thought it be nice that he seen how much she's grown.
But week later i discover there everywhere . The photographs posted haven't even been uploaded by myself ,never mind someone else doing it for me .

Not to be rude but i dont know why you uploaded them on fb, don't see the fansicnation with people uploading images of other people children on a soical network.
All i know i would never upload any kind of photograph of anyone child unless my own child pictured in it .
Just out of fear it may be percieved wrongly but that my opinion anyways.
And if you going through a access battle it wasn't a best of ideas to either.

The thing is, you say the picture wasn't suitable for publishing, WHY did you give him a picture that was sensitive? Am assuming child is unclothed in some way? else not sure why it wouldn't be suitable.

I think you are going to have to just accept this and move on.

Hello .
This isn't about the background it isnt about the person or me disliking them it about the privacy of my child .
I don't think the background of the case is any use to anyone here.
Bottom line is she has a photograph of my child which she ottained from a second party that i never consented to or acknowlegde having.

This image it being posted on a social network and i would like it to be removed from this soical network that the bottom line and i don't want the picture being pass on further that my point .And for the future i don't want any images being processed in that manner again.

I asked could i go to the police and get them to talk to them and ask them to remove any following images and before they post any i would like to be asked beforehand or have some acknowledgement what happening to it .

Regardless who they are family or not i would still liked to know where photographs of my child are going or the type of people seeing them .

Everyone has boundaries. The photograph isn't suitable for fb in my opinion it for family only . Only because i think it unsuitable for fb doesn't mean somelse would agree .

As a parent my wishes should be respected no1 has a right to ottain photo's of anyone child and post them wherever they like and pass them on to individauls without my the owner acknowledgement first .
He is the father to my child obviously i am happy for the photographs to be shared between the family not posted left right and centre .

And i want advice would it be ok to contact the police or anyone to pass on the message i would like them removed and for further images not to be posted

.

The Police would advise you to report the images to Facebook.

So her dads mum, her grandma is posting pics of her grandchild?

Is this not therefore more about your views on social networking sites as you've just said to me you don't get the fascination of people posting pics, that's your choice other people me including use Facebook for photos so family members etc can see them.

Also re your comment how it was a silly thing to do if were in a custody battle, the judge actually agreed with us that my partners ex was being un reasonable.

However I would imagine the police would do very little as it isn't a criminal issue, if I was in your situation and felt as strongly as you do maybe a solicitors letter requesting that the photos be removed and future images provided by you are not loaded on to any Internet site without your prior agreement. Or a letter could be sent from yourself if your not using a solicitor that way should this issue escalate and continue to happen you have recorded evidence that you have politely requested they refrain from doing it

It not about who they are it the prinpicial.
I am sorry but no1 regardless who they are should upload photographs of someone child .
Fair play she can her owns which she doesn't but why does she want to throw photographs of my child around if she not willing to her own she has no right to that the point .
I've gathered all her own images are being protected.
Anyways i am looking into getting the photographs removed by fb .
They changed it so i am finding it difficult to how //
Anyone know ?

I'm sorry things are so hostile between you and your ex. That's always a nightmare.

But: a child's grandmother posting photos of that grandchild to Facebook is indication of pride and affection in that child. That should be a good thing.

If any of the photos show your child naked then of course you want that removed. Otherwise, there should be no problem. The net is covered with perfectly innocent pictures of children, and posting pictures of a grandchild isn't a wrong thing to do, IMO.

I would ask you to think about whether the fact these people are horrible to you means your child should be denied a relationship with her own family - which they are. It's always awful when families are this hostile and please don't think I don't appreciate that, because I do. Your ex trying to get out of CSA by lying about paternity is especially vile, and you have every reason to hate his guts. BUT - there is so much evidence that children do better if they have some idea of both sides of the family, and some relationship with both. Every scrap of hostility is going to do that. This family are half of who your daughter is. Every argument with them will feel like a statement that she is in some way as horrible as you think they are. They're part of who she is, and unless this is a very unusual situation, she will need to be allowed to explore that for herself without feeling scared she'd be letting you down.

I don't think kicking off about a grandmother proudly posting pics of her grandchild on Facebook is going to do anything but damage your daughter.

You can call the police if you want, why do you ask here? Just call the non-emergency number 101 and ask them about the situation. It seems a shame to waste police time on it but you have every right to call and ask.

Meanwhile, although I agree with you that people are tremendously naive about what can happen to photos online and really, no one should be posting pictures of children who cannot consent to it, in the end, it is a numbers game now, with millions of pictures of children on the net, how likely is it that someone will steal your child's image? How likely is it that your DC will grow up to be famous so that people want to get at those images or that someone in your family ends up in a nasty accident or situation that leads the Daily Mail to raid FB pics? What is your actual fear of what will happen to this image?

What if your ex P displayed pictures of his DC in his home which every person coming round would see - how would you feel about that?

Seems to me that you are winding yourself up with negative emotions, if P's family are immature and unreasonable, leave them to it, let it wash over you. Once your DC is big enough to see ex on their own, there will be photos and you will waste tremendous amounts of unnecessary negative emotion on trying to control the images. The NSPCC or similar probably do an information sheet on why images should be kept private, send it to exP and ask him to forward to his MIL so she is better educated on net security. Remember too that the images you upload to FB will be forever in their database, whatever privacy settings you put, who knows who might own FB in the future so you might think you are controlling the image but really you are not in the longterm.

Call the police and say I gave some pics to daughters dad and now grandma has put them on Facebook and people are looking and commenting??

Why can't grandma see her grandchild and take her own photos? She is clearly proud of her grandchild!

If it's any comfort, one 8mo baby looks very much like every other 8mo baby to everyone other than its own immediate carers. Your DC will not be recognisable to anyone.

It's a massive deal to you, but everyone else will have just glanced at the photos for half a second on FB and then forgotten about them.

For your own sanity, let it go. There's really nothing you can do. Involving a solicitor will just cost you good cash.

And don't send electronic photos to XP in the future.

So because you dont post pictures of your children you expect other people to not post pictures of their children? Because those same children are also your ex'. They not yours to own and you are still going to have many, many times where you dont agree with eachother. This is very small in comparison. Seems like a control issue imho.

And the PR thing is nothing. He is her dad. PR would be granted if he took you to court or applied for it himself. It's not an issue

We past that PR curve .
And PR i know he would get it isn't a problem and don't bother me that for him to deal with.

Some of people comments are getting ridculous .
It not about ex's or EXMIL or control.

It fact i don't want those images uploaded on fb for my own personal reasons is that a problem ?
If i remember correctly this is my child and i pick and choice what i think is the correct way to bringing her up.
Whether many of you agree or disagree it personal perferences .
It this was my reilgion of some sort then people would be jumping the gun as much there many people for religioous reasons don't approve images of there children should be on soical networks so why isit a problem i don't approve aswell? what the differents?

There are two parents here and you do not own your child!

The only ridiculous comments are those who are discussing informing the police!

People need to stop trying get there head around the fact she a grandparent.
So because she a grandparent your telling me she entitled do 2 whatever she likes concerning my child because she is the grandparent after all ?
so i must allow her to ottained all the images she likes and post them everywhere just because she the grandparent i am not allowed to dispute that fact that ridculous !!
If i do dispute it i am being told i trying to be in control i trying to score points etc so i must go unheard and say nothing whilst she does what she wants
she might aswell pick the clothes and the school my child goes to next because afterall she the grandparent and PROUD!! and because of that i don't have a say without people trying to penilsed me .

Anyone is free to put any photo they like on fb. You can report photos to fb. They will take down nude ones or offensive ones. You also have the option of messaging a person to tell them to take down a photo.

You gave the photos to your ex, he can do what he likes with them. All you can do is ask him not to give them to other people.

The police will only be interested if any of this constitutes harassment or abuse, which it doesn't.

Noone said about owning the child.
I pass these photographs on to my ex who then pass them on without my acknowledgement so where my say in this ??
So you saying it ok for him to do what he wants :S
If he posted photos he had taken of my child and upload them that to do with him but to get photographs i have and pass them on to ppl and let them upload it that a diffo matter

You gave him photos. He can do what he likes with them.

Once digital images are passed on then whatever the legal rights of the situation are, you will be largely powerless to control where they go. You are a bit stuck this time but the best way forward is if you're going to send pics, do it by print in the post and choose the ones you send carefully. Sadly it's a lesson to learn from getting burned.

There got to be a middle ground ,
Yes i passed the photograph to him but i never had any incdation a week later these images would be passed on and everywhere
If he had consulted to me first that would of been better than just giving it out and letting whoever got them do what they want .
But i will resquest for these photographs to be removed and that the end of the matter .

But chances are they only going be uploaded again .
But if i continue to report her they will just block her account so that my best bet

thanks for your help

Once at school he will also be able to buy the school photos....2 if he wants,1 for him and 1 for gran

Pick your battles, this isn't one!

Do not call the police. It's not a criminal matter.

Honestly, I think you should look at this as a lesson learned, and let it go. Try to forget about it and just don't send any more photos from now on.

Yes it is reasonable for you to want to control your child's presence on FB. However, if you voluntarily send someone photos, you are sort of giving up that ability to control things.

If they were decent people they would respect your wishes, but why on earth would you ever think they are decent people to begin with? He has no relationship with his child, is even contesting paternity, and has been abusive to you? His mum has also been abusive verbally to you? So why trust them with photos if this is so important to you?

Just ignore it and it will all blow over. If you start sending solicitor letters they will know they've gotten to you and there will be all kinds of drama. Why would you want that?

AMummy you clearly dont want to hear anyone elses view and entertain the thought that maybe you are wrong. Which is fine but then dont post it on MN or throw a frothy when people see it for what it is.