Backstory: My friend has 4 dc. Her DD1 is 15yo, from her first relationship. Her DD2 is 10yo, from her second relationship. Her DD3 is 3yo, and her DS is 15mo, both from her third relationship, which broke down irreperably a week and a half ago.
The relationship had had problems all along, mostly because he was VERY controlling. He has been violent towards her once before, about 3 years ago, when they split up previously, but they got back together and he hasn't been physical since, it's all been messing with her head.
A week and a half ago, they had a row about her 15yo DD being allowed to go to an under 18's club night, which culminated in my friends Ex pushing over her 15yo DD. At which point, she asked him to leave.
I need to point out that while my friend works 12 hrs a week as a mid-day assistant at the local Secondary school, he stays at home to look after the two little ones, but it's only 12 hrs a week.
He has been staying with their next door neighbour. On Thursday evening, she was served with papers(?) telling her she had to be in Court on Friday. She had no time to get a case together, and she couldn't get a Solicitor, and ended up with a Duty Solicitor (?). Her Ex had prepared an 18 page statement, she had nothing.
They AREN'T married.
She came up with a Judge who is, erm, well known locally for being a mysoginistic twunt slightly biased towards men in these cases.
She has been ordered to let him move back in for 6 weeks, and that she only gets to be with her 3yo and her 15mo from 6.30am till 1.30pm (yes, just 7 hrs a day), and the rest of the time is 'his' time. The 6 weeks is apparently to give him time to find his own place. The house is a Housing Association house, NOT in a joint tenancy, the Tenancy is in her name only.
However, her 15yo and her 10yo have point blank refused to come back to the house while her Ex is there, and are now staying with her mother. I thought the courts were meant to appoint a Guardian Ad Litem to look after the interests of the children? ALL the children in the family? I can't see a Guardian Ad Litem suggesting this as a plan of action if it means that 1) Siblings will be separated, and 2) Two older dc feel pushed out of their own home. This is complicated by the fact that the father of her 10yo sexually abused her 15yo ten years ago, and therefore she is trying to protect her 15yo from any further emotional issues with men by kicking her Ex out as soon as he pushed her over.
She has been to a Solicitor this afternoon, they are going to appeal the decision, and they are going to try to take it to the bigger County Court, not our local one (in a hope to avoid this judge, I presume).
Can the Judge order this? Last night, she had her best friend round for a Chinese, and he literally pushed her friend out of the house and locked the door (locking both the friend out, and MY friend IN.). He has told my friend that he WON'T be moving out when the 6 weeks are up, he WILL keep the house and kids.
And he apparently did the same thing with the twin boys that he had with his first wife, and they weren't returned to the mother until they left him of their own accord and moved back in with their mother and refused to go back to him when they were 11yo.
He is a controlling, abusive, EA bastard, and he is breaking my friend into little pieces, and the fucking judge is complicit in this - where do I go/ who do I talk to or direct her to to get her some help with all this?!
(Sorry for massive length, and well done if you got to the bottom of it all!)