Has anyone any experience of changing a childs surname, when the other parent..

[piratecat]

with parental responsibilty is absent.

I have looked and looked at the law on this, and the deed poll side of it.

I want it to be in stone that dd has changed her name, and to do this I would need a court order instead of ex dh's permission. This would ensure that dd's passport could be changed.

Apparently with only a deed poll change (accompanied by a letter from me that ex has nothing to do with her) I might come up against problems officially, like the passport office. They would not accept the deed poll, and anyway a deed poll insists you use your new name, so i couldn't just leave dd's passport as her 'old name'

So I applied for a C1 form to the courts, for a court order and the form says I have to put in ex dh's name and address(respondents) anyway.
Then i have to serve him the paper, and he would know, come to court and oppose this. Even though he has nothing to do with her and she desp wants to change her name to my maiden name.

I thought the whole point of being able to get a court order was so you could override the other parent's wishes. Especially in cases where the other parent is abusive, or totally not bothered.

What happens if i don't put his address on the C1 form? What would happen if i didn't know his address?

What do the courts do to get in touch with him?

I feel so trapped by the system.

sorry to re post, but this is what it says

Please note that the issue of a Deed Poll by us is no guarantee that all official record holders, e.g. school, doctor, passport office etc, will change your child's name records. This is because legally, official record holders should satisfy themselves that all those with parental responsibility have consented to the child's surname change. If the consent of the absent father is not obtained, an official record holder can refuse to change a child's name records. However, our experience is that this rarely happens except with the passport office. The official position of the UK Identity and Passport Service concerning the issue of children's passports where the father has parental responsibility but his whereabouts is unknown, is to provide them with a court order. It may be that your passport application will be successful without a court order - certainly many have been in the past. But with the general move towards tighter government control over identity documents such as passports, you may be asked for a court order.

and as i posted earlier they want a letter of consent, which i am not going to get.

totally by it tbh.

Sorry, but that link is a pile of crap, and the advice it gives is wholly wrong. Can't believe they're peddling this stuff as actual advice.

so whats the truth if its wrong? can you explain more for me? thanks

You simply need the consent of all those with parental responsibility to change the name of a child. If they refuse their consent, or they can't be found, you need a court order. Simple as that.

Just came across this thread...

I am currently changing my sons name. I sent off the deedpoll form this morning.

my ex is on sons birth cirtificate but has no contact with him and does not have the same surname. I have sent a letter of consent as requested by deedpoll explaining this.

I phoned the passport officae and they said there is no way they will change to new surname without the consent of both parents with parental responsibility, BUT you can use the passport with their old surname on it.

Think the system is ridiculous. the fathers that do not see thier children or pay a penny for them should not get to decide things like this. us mums do everything for our children but we do cannot have the final say in things

Good luck with whatever you decide to do