suddenly I have 3 dc's and I'm not sure how to do this.....

[kitkat9]

Have ds1 (nearly 5) dd (nearly 2) and ds2 is almost 3 weeks old. We live abroad and have had dm and mil here for the past 3 weeks, so have been helping with the 2 older dc's, cooking, laundry etc, they've been invaluable...

and now I'm about to take them to the airport and I could weep. I just don't know how I'm going to cope. dd in particular is hard work, and although she and ds1 get on pretty well I can't really leave them unsupervised, obviously. ds1 is at school every day so that's a bit of help.

dh is out of the house by 6.30 every morning and although he helps out when he's here, he's not usually home till 7pm or thereabouts.

so, I need advice on how to get organised through the day. ds2 is breastfed on demand and is in absolutlely no kind of routine as yet, he's so little. I'm so tired and the thought of looking after the house as well as 3 dc's is overwhelming me. I know that for lots of you a family of 5 isn't exactly 'large', but this is all new to me so any nuggets of wisdom you can offer would help. how do you fit in the housework, laundry, cooking, etc etc etc when your demanding toddler is tantrumming and your baby needs fed again???

this is what i did
ds1 was taken to school by neighbours. so he simply had to be gotten ready. he was almost six when dd arrived, so didnt need dressing, except for his tie. breakfast was either cereal or toast.
dd was breastfed on demand, then put down. picked up again only to be fed or changed, or cleaned. all attention given to 18 month old to ensure he was kept safe, clean, and not jealous of dd. food was always simple stuff. and whatever ds1 wanted. if he wanted chikcen nuggers and chips, then that was what we ate with steamed veg.
when it came to weaning dd, she wasnt interested in pureess. andinsisted on blw. which was brilliant.
i did not try and make a routine. every day was one step at a time.oh, and i looked a mess for her first year. lol, the kids would be clean and dressed in nice clothes, but not me.

breastfeedng was a godsend, as no faffing around with bottles and sterilisers. made life much much easier. well, the ffirst three weeks werre a nightmare, but after that it was easier.

kitkat, i also INSISTED on getting a cleaner. dh was never around, so i made sure he paid for one to come in and do the toilets floors etc. for me, it wasabsolutely essential.
and if you work it out, since i never had my hair, or nails or gyme membership then, it was probably a saving.

"and if you work it out, since i never had my hair, or nails or gyme membership then, it was probably a saving. "

Lol

i too have children (now 10,9 and 8)with only 12 months between each one.Hubbie worked away when first two were born.That fear of dread is so overwhelming isn't it and yet,you will get on cos you know you have to!I do everything in three's...bit like a conveyor belt I suppose!.Just try not to obsess about the housework too much.I did that and I ended up with depression.Just concentrate on the little ones and yourself.You'll be fine.

oh and if you can possibly get at least one of them into a nursery,well that's a real plus.

This is great stuff, completely echo the easy teas advice, which is dead healthy too. And the plates can even be made up earlier with level 1 and left in the fridge (or put in sandwich boxes so they can munch while siblings eg do activities).

Don't get them used to fancy drinks; water and milk is usually more healthy.

Level 1: Toast, hummus, cucumber, radishes, chopped carrots, raisins, ham, cheese, bread sticks, rice cakes.

Level 2: tuna toasties, beans on toast, chunky chicken and rice, all with broccoli, grilled halloumi, fish finger sandwiches

Level 3: yes sometimes I do get the energy for something more hot & 'wholesome'. But tbh they tend to prefer the simpler stuff.

We have such silly high expectations with our children. If they are safe, warm and fed at the end of the day, and they have had cuddles, love, quality conversation and a chance to play - that's great! The best thing you can give them, arguably, is siblings for life.

Heather (DS1 8, DD1 6, DS2 3 and expecting unplanned twins - so yes I'm with the panickers too!)

I have ds1 (6), ds2 (almost 4) and ds3 (4 months).I was really worried about this very thing as I found it horrendous when ds2 was born and truely hated the early days of juggling two. But I have found 3 to be a breeze. DS1 is in school, ds2 in nursery in the mornings.

Forget the house. Let your standards slacken. As long as they are fed and clothed you are doing ok. Plan at least one thing to do each day - even if it is just a ten minute walk. Get baby dressed after first first of the day. Have all clothes including your own set out the night before and any packed lunches etc (DH would even me me a packed lunch in the early days and a flask of coffee in case I had my hands full).

Found breastfeeding to be great - no bottles, sterlisig etc.

Have 'bits' in the fridge - cartons of juice, hidden biscuits, breadsticks, hummus, , fruit for easy access food.
Shop online if you can.
Cook duoble when you cook meals like spag bol etc and freeze one lot. Buy red pesto and soft cheese. Quick and easy tea.

Wash your hair etc on anevening
dont try to bath all three on your own

cd player and sotry cds fror bedtime emergencies

wilfsell i need dry shampoo!!!!
where can i buy ity

red pesto and chesse to go with pasta -excuse typping - ds3 here too

When ds was born, dd1 was 3.11 and dd2 was 2.5. DH had to go back to the Gulf when ds was 2wks old. We have 2 dogs that need a good hour (at least!) walk every day. I did a trial dog-walk with all 3 while DH was still here, and ended up in tears, because it all seemed so difficult and I was sure I would never manage!!

But I did! I had good days and bad days, and on the bad days I would just think "tomorrow will be better!" It is definitely a learning curve, but I found that having a vague routine in place for the other 2/ the dogs, ds soon slipped into it and it was nowhere near as bad as I thought it would be. Poor ds was just bundled along to the girls gymnastics classes, nursery drop-offs etc. It all seems to have passed in a blur- he is 14mths now, and I can't imagine only having 2!! You will be fine!

loving this thread - it brought back all the dread that i had when dc3 was born (dd 7, ds1 4 & ds2 2.4). we've got no family help either!!
My husband was on call once a week and the first few weeks after ds2 was born i had to get a friend to come and help me to put them all to bed!!
I made life harder for myself by trying to be supermum but very quickly realised i was going to end up in a mental hospital!! so if i didnt have a shower before i took dd to school well nobody realised!! there's not a sniff test at the school gates! it always felt much easier to have one once we came back!
The first few weeks are hard but i soon got them into a routine where they both had a lunchtme nap at the same time - this (and being a wee bit smelly in the morning) were the two things that saved my sanity!!
2 years later i'm sat on mumsnet at 8pm so it all works out in the end!

hey...me too! (and I had 3 kids in the space of less than 2 years!!!) you will cope.just dont obsess about who's "watching"...cos nobody is!!!

Hi Kitkat,

I have 3 children too, so a small family by the standards of this forum!

I think you just muddle through and decide what your priorities are.

I did things like listening to DS1 read as soon as he came home from school, while I breastfed DS3

With DS2, I would breastfeed him sitting on the loo while DS1 was in the bath

I cancelled all the things I helped with after a few months (church stuff etc) and cancelled arrangements with friends if I didn't feel up to it. I sadly lost one or two friends, but it was what I had to do.

For me, housework was a priority. I figured that if I was going to be tired then I wanted to be tired in a tidy house so that I knew where things were etc. So, I would spend 30-45 mins tidying at the end of the day which meant I would get, for instance, 4 hours sleep rather than 4 hours 45mins, but at least the house felt under control. Not sure whether I would recommend that or not, to be honest, because at one stage I got very tired indeed.

I think you have to just remember that it gets easier very quickly. I guess, if you are tired, you are tired whether you have one or nine children, and you just have to muddle through as best you can. Good luck!