Can you have a career and a large family?

[conniedescending]

Hi,

I have 4, aged 5 and under and the plan has always been to go back to my career (well, start it again tbh) when the youngest is approaching school age - so 4 years or so. In the mean time I've been doing the odd bit of freelance work for my old employer...

Just wondering if anyone else managed to juggle large family with sucessful career or am I kidding myself?

Sorry if I came across as a bit rude towards lawyers, pollyanna.

I'm fortunate that I'm on career break so will be going back to part time, local, low stress & responsiblity finance job with the option to study/progress if I want to - however I may just leave it as a job to provide money rather than a career IYSWIM.

I retrained in my current career (health and safety inspector) seven years ago when my eldest was 13 and my (then) youngest had just turned 3. I have since had another baby.
It can be done but I do always feel that it would have been much, much easier to get the training, building a career part of things out of the way before I had children not because I think that my employer (who is pretty family-friendly and forward thinking in that respect) discriminates against me but because I just don't have the time / energy etc to devote to my career that childless colleagues have.
I also think that juggling job / children must be infinitely easier if you have money. Being able to pay for live-in childcare, au pairs, cleaners etc and even for a second car to ferry the kids around would help oil the wheels of life, so to speak.

sadly so much does come down to money in the end, although at least nannies are now an option if you qualify for childcare element of CTC (as we do) and least they could then do some of the washing/meal preps/having friends for tea.

I work 4 days with 4 dc sdc. It is very hard tbh. Our dc are older and dd is 20 mo. I agree with the post that the whole house looks like a tenagers bedroom. Our house is always a tip and needs constantly tidying

We have no close support, and it is a real struggle if dp goes away even for 1 night. I also agree with poster who said that older dc take up more time than younger ones. Younger ones at least go to bed early!!

Yesterday, got up, dealt with dd, tidied, put loads of wshing on (washing machine seems to be on permanently), took dd, out, made dinner, put her down for afternnon nap, ironed, whilst doing 1 1/2 hours revision with ds for his SATS. Made tea etc etc etc. It never stops, and I have the holidays as well as am a teacher. Do find it difficut and knackering

I changed careers when I had 2 children. I switched from working in industry to teaching (ie I did a PGCE).

When I had my third child, I gave up completely - which turned out to be 8 years. Pressures from school fees meant returning to work. It took me two years to land a good permanent job, but during that time I was working probably about 2/3 time and getting terrific experience.

ditto pollyanna, I was 28 when I had my first as well.
at careless!!!!!

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pollyanna is another one! about to have her 5th
I'm in wiltshire. was a city sol but now pt time DJ locally which is fascinating and completely different (wasn't even litigating before!)

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uhhhh no lisa sadly not that trendy
more to do with wigs and benches rather than decks and drugs
perhaps our paths did. was in a magic circle for years and years doing IT and telecoms work

i am mum of 4 and am in my 1st year of beign a classroom ass and am only in colege 1 day and school 1 day but just found out next year is changing will be more colege hours and school hours and am so worried bout childcare im thinking of givin in an trying again wen ds2 starts school
god give me strenghth child care so expensive wat am i goin to doo!!!!

Look for a book called 'The Compleat Woman' [sic] by Valerie Grove I think. It's case studies of women who have successful careers, at least three children and long marriages.

It was published in the 70s and isn't directly relevant to us today (plus the women profiled do tend to be of the privileged, loads of money and nannies variety and a lot of them are successful novelists, nice work if you can get it....). But I still found it interesting!

I'm pg with number 3 and have definitely put career on hold to look after children. Saying that, I work part-time from home as a freelance editor - not much money but I manage more or less with no childcare so all teh money I make is mine. Once DCs are at school I think my type of work will be ideal as it is so flexible but also reasonably interesting/professional. Miss the stimulation of the office but jsut don't see how it's possible to combine that with my wish for lots of DCs and to see lots of them!

i am a hospital doctor and always worked, and intend, well have to really, after the 4th comes along in july. i did make life easier for myself by going part-time after the 3rd, and having 6 months mat leave instead of 4 months!! it is do-able, if you want to or if you have to
good luck

I am an engineer, and have 4 children.

we have 5 dc under 5 both me and dh run companies of our own- does help to have a ft nanny

I have remained as MD of an IT company throughout having children - DC4 is due in 5 weeks and my eldest is 6yo. Admittedly I don't do that much work!

I only work from home, mostly in the evenings. DH also works at home, at least 4 days a week.

We don't have a nanny but do have lots of other domestic staff.

OMG i have just found out im preg with fourth and am a little scared as to how my career is going to progress. I qualified as mortgage adviser aged 24, after i had dd1 aged 23. I have continue in the same career although pretty much part time through ds1 and ds2. I went self employed as a mortgage broker in feb to give myself more freedom and better income capability but now i dont know if that was such a good idea .. obviously dc4 was not planned and im happy just a little scared as im not sure how im gonna cope!

I'm a teacher with 4 dcs and have worked part-time since having 2dc. I did qualify before having the children. I notice that I don't have the confidence to go for management posts now, even though I was a middle manager pre-kids.

Regarding au pairs, even if you have space in your house, it is very difficult to recruit an au pair if you have a large family. There are threads on this in the childcare section.

I've got 4; 10,8,4&4 and work theoretically part-time. I'm really lucky to have an enlightened employer (although technically I'm a consultant) who wants the benefit of experience and doesn't see the point of having people sitting at desks for the sake of it. So I mostly work in a home office and arrange all my meetings for between 10 and 2:30 without telling clients why. OK, I end up working evenings and weekends and haven't seen the inside of a book for ever, but on the other hand, I do get to do all the school pick-ups, music lessons, ballet and friends over stuff. Agree that smaller children are far easier to 'park' when necessary. DH and I spend hours organising the logistics, but at least we can pay the mortgage.

Got 4, 2 at school and 2 littlies. Work couple of days teaching Yoga in schools and maybe couple of evenings planning & admin stuff. Would love to do evening classes but dh works long hours so hard to get out. No family locally. Working school hours seems only doable way at moment as it costs so much less in childcare, and still get to do all the mumsy stuff.

Got 4 and am a fulltime medical student. Can be challenging, brainwise as well as everything else as I'm not 18 any more. Never do as much work as I would like, and cross my fingers that patients will only ask me the things I know!!! (Don't worry, it'll be years until I'm a real doctor!)