Interesting BBC Article on Toddlers Eating Habits - Food for thought for those who have 'problem eaters....'?

[notyummy]

[http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/health/8010104.stm]

My children (nearly 2 and nearly 7) do eat pretty much anything. We had a vindaloo yesterday with spicy indian bread. They don't bat an eyelid. It's quite amusing to see 50 year olds who complain the same food is too spicy.

Agree with cory re phases. I have 1 brilliant eater (7yo) and one very picky (4yo). The 7yo used to be a lot more picky but has gradually improved and now will try pretty much anything. The 4yo was a brilliant eater until he was about 16 months old, and since then it has been hard work. We try to eat meals together when possible but the range of foods that he will eat (and I am willing to give him!) is pretty limited, so he often gets an alternative which is quick and easy for me to prepare (and then the rest of the family can get more variety!). I offer him our food to try as well. I try not to make a fuss. I was a pretty picky eater as a child so I'm just hoping he'll grow out of it. Even though he is picky his preferred foods are not necessarily `junk' foods (he will not touch burgers or sausages for instance).

Some guy, some substances taste revolting to certain individuals while others find the taste OK and others cannot taste them at all. It's genetic. So maybe 50yos complaining about spicy food just taste it differently.

good article - although I do question the

"Remember that a normal child will not allow himself to starve"

My DS1 is perfectly normal (as far as 8 1/2yr old boys go ) but when he was a toddler in a bid to get him to eat properly we decided to be strict and only offer him one choice - and that was what we were eating.

He was also a poor drinker, often having no more than 5-10oz of fluid a day.

After 7 days without him eating anything I caved and we continued what we had been doing before. He now does eat anything I put in front of him. But I am under no doubt that the refusal to eat anything would have continued much longer than 7 days had I allowed it to.

'My DTS are now 5yo and have good eating habits because we never made a big issue with food'

We never made a big issue with food with our children, either. But we have one son who will eat anything and one daughter who would prefer to eat only white or beige food. Both were fed and weaned in exactly the same way. My DH and I eat pretty well everything and love experimenting.

BUT...I remember being a fussy eater as a child. Very small variations in texture and taste seemed overwhelming to me. My palate seems to have become less sensitive over time. My parents certainly didn't pander to his at all; but I definitely preferred my mother's food to anyone else's. Even if it was the same recipe I'd taste subtle differences and wouldn't want to eat it.

Some children with eating problems are just born that way, not made.

Despair not - DH was an incredibly fussy child. Wouldn't eat pasta, rice ( chilli on taost anyone), brown bread, salad, fish etc When I met him he was still very conservative. Now he'll eat anything but pasta. His Mother is astounded.
Should also say that despite his fussiness he grew up to be perfectly healthy, over six foot and incredibly bright.
Despair ye not.

"A very stubborn child may refuse to eat for two or three meals but eventually will have to give in unless he's being offered snacks between meals."

But I thought toddlers and preschoolers generally should have snacks between meals (??).

DS (nearly 5) will sometimes get hysterical about something, and we realise afterwards that it's because he's too hungry. No he won't starve himself, but he might make our lives hellish until he does agree to eat something.

I do agree with much of the article. But most of it is pretty obvious, just common sense.

So true, cory, about being careful with our smuggery just because we don't have a fussy eater... yet.

I hate that advice about getting a child to try something X many times and then 9 times out of ten they will come to like it. That advice screwed me over good. Many foods DS used to eat he has come to dislike over time, including apples. Once at the after-school club they wouldn't let him leave the snack table until he ate a piece of apple. Years later, the kids club has changed policy but DS still won't eat apple, AND he refuses to ever set foot in the after-school club. .

is wanted to punch that woman on tv this am

kids will starve themsleves 0 remmebr the girl with the dental phobia

i never lieks the rind on brie as a kid and my mUM telling me it was delicious made no difference

My ds wouldn't eat solids until he was getting on for 2 years old. He used to choke and even with Babylicious type food he often used to vomit on it - it was a nightmare feeding him. One day it all got better - it got better once he could walk around 15 months and then properly better around 2. Some kids will eat solids really early, others won't. With your first, you get really worried (I did) but the "rules" are nonsense. (My son also had a bottle until he was 2 - apparently you should get rid at 1 at the latest - his teeth are fine).

Rules are for the guidance of wise men and to dictate to fools. Remember that when people tell you what your child "should" be doing at a certain age.

Some guy, some substances taste revolting to certain individuals while others find the taste OK and others cannot taste them at all. It's genetic. So maybe 50yos complaining about spicy food just taste it differently.

Possibly some, but if you live in India/Thailand/Indonesia you just eat chili and rice because that's the diet. 99% of it is learned behaviour.

There will always be picky eaters and always were. I, apparently, only ate chocolate spread sandwiches, cake and fruit for a while and that was living as part of a very traditional meat and two veg family where all meals were sat as a family and no snacks as we couldnt afford them! As an adult I eat absolutely anything. My friend, also a 70s child, is soooo fussy and still is. My friends husband has only eaten chips and a certain type of bread, with soup all his life. He is a 60s child. My first dd is soo fussy and has been monitored and helped via hospital (still only eats about 6 foods), second dd eats really well and is quite adventurous, third dd is fussiest of the lot! Cant think I have done anything differently!!! Makes me mad when people think that it is poor parenting. And for those with toddlers, all my children weaned fantastically and, yes, I was smug. They stopped eating around 1.5 years old. We all eat as a family and always have, food is not an issue and I dont think we have made a fuss or force fed, most food is home-made and some snacks may be given, but they are few and usually non filling like a piece of fruit (although I do not object to choc, crisps etc all in moderation). Somebody like to tell me where I am going wrong - HVs, doctors etc cant. We grow our own veg and always have done (all three girls dont eat a single vegetable including potato), etc etc. I would love help so those of you who put eating problems down to my poor parenting skills - feel free. Rant over.

Parents who have never had problems with DC and food can come over all smug when telling others how it's done. You know - don't give them 'junk',don't offer alternatives, don't make a fuss, ' my 10 month old loves foie gras and quails' eggs' sort of thing. I know because I was that parent ( not foie gras though!). At least with DS1- and me being a Food Tech teacher and all. I knew it all and DS1 had a voracious appetite - still has- and gobbled everything up.

DS2 then pulled me up short. 2 months premature but soon piled on the weight,took to solid food fine and then at the age of about 18 months got increasingly fussy to the point of excluding fruit, veg, anything not instantly identifiable so no sauces etc. and generally favouring junk.

It wasn't ' just a phase' as it turned out but I spent years with no help, lots of ' tut tuts' and a feeling of failure. My knowledge of nutrition helped me ensure he got a healthy ( if restricted) intake of essential nutrients and I developed a thick skin.
It's a long story but turned out he had / has sensory issues related to atypical Aspergers. Ironically, his brother has full-blown AS and eats like a horse.

The throwaway line about no 'normal' child starving itself has a hollow ring for me as I considered my son ' normal' and, actually, I still do.But children with sensory issues often don't appear any different to others in most other ways but they will starve themselves if not handled flexibly.

Campion - I too have had lots of 'tut tuts' and can feel a failure. Fortunately, I too have quite a good knowledge of nutrition and so can ensure that all three children have a nutritious diet if very limited in two. And it isnt a phase - my dd1 has been fussy for 6 years now. dd3 has always been fussy and had a very very limited diet. I have had so many professionals say it is nothing I have done, and that naturally we eat in a very sensible and laid back way and that we fit into the very best ideas of how children should eat (i.e. interest in growing food, eating at table, limited snacks, little junk but not obsessively so etc) but I have two of the worst eaters I know. For years it didnt bother me and i was truly laid back about it - but since being a mumsnetter I have become far more consious of it.

interesting re the sensory stuff.
My ds1 has sensory issues and won't eat certain foods. You can see his hands open and close and he starts swallowing rapidly when the plate is brought in. he valiently tries to eat some htings but you can see it is a big big issue for him.
we cope and he has afab diet, just nothing sloppy.

I'd avoid smuggery too- he was eating all sorts for the first 2 yrs of his life and then suddenly went off slopy food and various other things changed at that point too.
I don't think he has asperger's, he's pretty high up on the way to the spectrum however.

On the outside he just looms fussy and I have seen other parents judge us with their perfect eating dcs.

Ds2 will eat anything and everything. he has no sensory issues at all.

one of my ds1's fave foods is chickpeas and cous cous with carrots, beans and veg on the side.
Feed him a healthy lookng lasagna and he would freak!
so some days he looks like he'll eat anything when other people see him- but other days he looks like the freakiest fussy child ever.

Someguy, you may well be right. Most people in their 50s wouldn't have grown up on a diet of spicy food it's true. I am in my early 40s and didn't have spicy food at all till I was in my 20s (my mother never cooked anything adventurous!) and I can't bear hot spicy food. But I do enjoy mildly spicy food.

TBH (being one myself!) I don't see what's wrong with being a `fussy eater'. You can't make yourself like a food. I think most normal children will eat a reasonable mix of healthy foods if their parents consistently offer them and don't overfeed their children on snacks between meals. But it really doesn't matter, IMO, if their diet is a bit limited as long as they eat a mix of different food types.

DD is nearly 2 and does eat loads of stuff including some very unexpected and unusual things.

However I keep my smugness to myself as I have absolutely no doubt that this result is down to:

a. Luck rather than judgement

and

b. Her nature

I am waiting for the tide to turn and for her to suddenly turn her nose up at everything except wotsits and jam...

Well I have a fussy eater ds 2.10. (feel that I need to start a support group)

Yesterday he had a bowl of cereal and thats it. No snacks or biscuits. He wouldn't eat his lunch cauliflour/broccoli cheese so I took it away and refused him anything else.

He cried at bedtime because he was hungry.

Comments from the doctor such as "he could live on yogurt for a year" are not helpful.

Have done stickers/charts etc but to no avail. Can't even get him to taste anything.

poshtottie - without wishing to offer advice I'd have another think about sending a 2 yr old to bed upset because he's hungry, when he may already have problems around ( some) foods. Little bodies need food not sticker charts - you may escalate matters by making it into a big deal.

It's great to have them in a good routine around food but it's not so great when they stop eating and start losing weight - and I've been there.When that happens you're more than grateful to feed them on crisps and chocolate. Cauliflower and broccoli cheese is quite a strong flavour for small children ( though I love it).

I honestly don't want to appear critical or judgmental ( though I can see you'll think so) but , like frogwatcher, I've experienced years of a 'difficult / fussy' eater and it kind of changes your perspective on things.
I'm up for the support group though!

My 5yo used to be terrible. He wasn't fussy in the conventional sense, he just seemed to have no appetite. The longest he went without eating at all was 5 days but he would have about 500ml milk a day. He lost quite a bit of weight but there was nothing I could do except try and give him calorie rich foods. It went on for about 18 months and he never said he was hungry or acted up. It was odd.

I agree with Campion's post. It is so hard to deal with fussy eaters but what really worked for us (although it has taken 6 long years) is all eating together and just not making a big deal about food. My son has very very gradully got more adventurous just through watching us all enjoy and try a wide variety of foods. When he was small, if he didn't eat something, I would remove it without comment but I would offer him something like fruit, rice cakes etc later.

It is also true what they say about repeatedly offering new foods. After 5 years of perpetually snubbing stir fries, last night he ate one without comment. Although he still won't eat broccoli or a lot of other green veg, he will happily eat a spicy laksa or a whole baked garlic.

campion, cauliflour cheese is one of the few things he will eat thats why I offered him it.

I thought it was right to offer no alternative so I didn't as then he will only eat yogurt or cereal. When I was child you ate what you were given and that was it. I have never been fussy regarding food and it is frustrating as I love to cook and it is disheartening to cook lovely food and he won't even taste it.

Anyway the health visitior is coming today so I'll see what words of wisdom she can offer.

Any advice is much appreciated.

I sympathise poshtottie - it is so dispiriting when they suddenly refuse one of the few healthy things they will eat. My boy is still horribly skinny.

Its not like I am not used to fussy eaters, have met many when working as a nanny.

I remember cooking a lovely roast for a family and when one of the kids refused it her mum took a pizza out of the freezer.