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Original poster

Lesbian slur

41 replies

Lucifera · 28/07/2008 15:13

I'm annoyed by this story - OK of course the estate agents shouldn't have used the word lesbian as a reference, but "slur"? One, they are lesbians, so what? Two, horrible to refer to it as a "slur", like calling someone a thief or a racist.
And they are in Suffolk, groan. Does not raise my hopes of finding convivial queer company when we move there full-time.

OP posts:
hearnoevil · 28/07/2008 17:28

are the quotes and pictures in the first article from a direct interview?or have they been lifted from other sources.
i'm just wondering because it seems a bit odd to say that a website put them in danger by announcing their sexuality, only to then give interviews to the media about it.surely that would only attract more attention and danger.

MsDemeanor · 28/07/2008 18:45

IT was the fact that their exact address was linked to their sexuality that bothered them and made them afraid. They were also I would imagine aware that this meant the estate agents were tittering about their sexuality in the office.
It would also be wrong to put 'Black woman' or 'muslim' on the website. It was clearly accidental, but they didn't apologise and it does say something about their attitude.

ClockWise · 28/07/2008 18:48

I understand why this is really offensive. Working Class is not a swear word, but yet I feel slightly irked when I read Irish and working class together, often, and always in UK publications, as though it would be impossible to be one without the other.

Elasticwoman · 28/07/2008 22:47

Why does Peter Tatchell refers to gays AND lesbians, as though lesbians are not gay?

Original poster
Lucifera · 29/07/2008 09:33

Well re Peter Tatchell, lots of lesbians inc myself would never describe ourselves as gay or gay women, we use the word lesbian (or dyke, actually, tho' that's more a "between ourselves" word). So that's why.

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hearnoevil · 29/07/2008 11:16

"we use the word lesbian (or dyke, actually, tho' that's more a "between ourselves" word). "

just wondering, seeing as this is about a "lesbian slur", and you brought up the fact that you and other lesbians you know happilly refer to yourself as dykes. how would you feel about straight people using the word or a publication? would it make a difference if it was a straight man or straight woman saying it?
or would your reaction be completely dependent on wether or not they used it as an insult or purely descriptive term for a lesbian.

Original poster
Lucifera · 29/07/2008 12:51

well, hearnoevil, that's a funny thing, isn't it? If a close straight friend used the word to me I would feel fine about it, as I would feel they used it in the same spirit as I do. But from someone I didn't know, it could sound pejorative; even if they seemed to be using it purely descriptively I would be a bit taken aback! In the same way, other groups who can experience discrimination/prejudice often reclaim "insulting" words for themselves, that "outside" people wouldn't use.
thanks for your question - it's interesting to consider these issues!

OP posts:
jesuswhatnext · 29/07/2008 13:23

lucifera - i live in ipswich, my dd and her friends tell me there is a cool gay nightclub here, cant think of the name right now tho!

Original poster
Lucifera · 29/07/2008 14:42

thanks Jesus! My clubbing days are probably over, but nice to know there is gay life out there!

OP posts:
hellsbells76 · 29/07/2008 14:58

my friend's mum and her girlfriend live a very happy and 'out' life on the suffolk coast

UnquietDad · 29/07/2008 15:01

It's a very odd thing to put in property details, and a reprimand and apology is in order, but a £5K payout seems a little excessive.

whooosh · 29/07/2008 15:06

It seems that the press have used the word "slur"-the couple were more concrned that they didn't want their sexuality advertised on a property website.
Fair enough I say.

Now had it said "Uglybutch dyes"-that would have been a slur-which incidentally neither of them ar

The word lesbian apparently was in the box where one would expect to see a reference number.

Blu · 29/07/2008 15:23

I think it is really really disgraceful of The Times to imply that the use of the term 'lesbian' is a 'slur'.

'lesbian' is a value-free noun....just totally inappropriate as a reference to a private property, and none of RightMoves business to publicise or focus on at all.

TheFallenMadonna · 29/07/2008 15:30

Blimey. I think the Times should be apologising to them as well TBH. It's more than clumsiness isn't it? Unthinking almost certainly, but that's hardly an excuse.

Swedes · 29/07/2008 18:54

I don't think lesbian is a defamatory term, that's not why the estate agent has offered compensation. It was probably offered for invading their right to privacy. However, the Times suggesting being a lesbian is a slur is highly probably defamatory. The muff-divers should consult a good defamation lawyer as soon as possible.

Hecate · 29/07/2008 19:03

Slur? how is it a slur? It's not a slur, because being a lesbian or being called a lesbian is not horrible, or insulting in any way, is it?

A slur is claiming you dress as mary poppins and eat marmite from the jar while shagging a dalmation.

However, using 'lesbian' as public reference for their property is as inappropriate as using 'black person' or 'disabled' or 'white' or 'indian' or what have you. It is not relevant in any way.

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