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PLEASE be careful

90 replies

nailpolish · 15/12/2004 10:40

i recently heard this story and it really made me think twice.

dont know if its true, never saw it in the papers or anything.

a mother in lanarkshire lives with her dad and her toddler. the mum went shopping and so her dad was looking after the 2 year old. the dad said to toddler 'grandads going upstairs for a shower i wont be long' and he did. when he came down there was no sign of the toddler, he looked out the window and a man was running down the street with toddler under his arm. he managed to stop them and called the police.

turned out the man who had snatched the child was a convicted paedophile who had chanced by the house and seen the toddler in the house on her own and just walked in and picked her up.

i now lock my door at all times and its really frightened me. its sad though cos i used to leave the door unlocked so friends and family could just come in and out.

OP posts:
sophabaubles · 15/12/2004 13:17

senora, i'm totally with you on this.

fisilhohoho · 15/12/2004 13:31

I agree about the urban myth. Besides anything else, how did they manange to get a two year old who doesn't follow you to the bathroom and hang about by the shower playing peepo with the curtain and lining up Thomas books ready to ambush you with cries of "read it now!" the moment you step out of the shower!

morningpaper · 15/12/2004 14:05

All these sorts of events get LOTS of public attention and I can't think of a small child being the victim of this kind of assault since Jamie Bulger (Victoria Climbie (sp?) perhaps). So that's about once every ten years. Vulnerable children have more to fear from their parents than from strangers.

To be honest I'd find it REALLY RUDE if my friends or family walked into my house without knocking - isn't that just good manners?!! What if you were doing something ... rude?!

tammylove · 15/12/2004 14:19

Still a worry though, my door is always locked shut at all times. i would much rather be safe than sorry.

Myth or not, fact is thios COULD happen to anyone, so its always good to tread the path of caution IMO.

MINNIE1 · 15/12/2004 14:20

this happened in my area about 10 years ago... I don't think it was paedophile's that were doing it as 10 years back a paedophile were not really heard off.. Any way there were 3 young chrildren in a house with there mum (lived about a mile away from our home house) One was watching tv and the youngest 2 were playing outside in there garden (they lived in the country) it was a lovely summers days and every child in the country would be out.. there mum just happened to see a man walking toward the garden wall and was wondering what he was at.. She wasnt alarmed as ya never heard of snachers that often, she though it was a young man just saying a quick hello to the kids.. However she was alarmed when she saw him giving the kids sweets and him openeing the gate to let them out to him... Thats when she ran to get them!!!!! He heard her scream and running down the garden and he ran off to a car up the road and a was away...She said there were 2 of them one driving and the man that approched the kids... Back then i think it was a case of the men selling the kids on!!!!

For ages that women went everywhere with he kids, she was so lucky to be standing at that window..

Demented · 15/12/2004 15:34

Nailpolish, I think you may know the road I live on, one of the busiest in the area and I keep my doors locked at all times, although in the summer I allowed my DSs out into the garden (walled) and did leave them unsupervised at times (although their screaming and laughing does travel through the house so wasn't overly worried unless it went quiet).

What worries me more is what I saw the other day. There is a paper shop/sweet shop on the same street and someone left their baby in a pram outside the shop, even taking sickos out the picture the safety issues connected with leaving a baby in a pram beside a very busy road, makes me shudder to think what could have happened. I was in the car otherwise I would have waited with the pram until she came out again, don't care how interferring she would think I was being.

ZCMUM · 15/12/2004 15:41

Somtimes mums have no choice but to leave prams outside shops! Most of the shops where I live would be impossible to take a pram in them!

Demented · 15/12/2004 15:45

I use the shop myself, it's a bit awkward but manageable and you usually get help from the person behind the counter.

whitepixmas · 15/12/2004 16:34

Well sorry to be the voice of doom but things like this DO happen. When my dd was a tiny baby I came in the back door with the pram. As it is a pub we have a long passageway there that leads through to the bar and it's the only place I can leave a pram without lugging it up 2 flights of stairs. Anyway, as dd was asleep and I hadn't passed anyone in the back garden as I came in I thought it would be ok to take the shopping upstairs and then come back for dd. (also there were staff behind the bar who I thought would hear her and the back door was closed).
While I was in the kitchen unpacking bags a woman walked into a bedroom where my stepdad was decorating and when he challenged her she ran away. She had come in the back door and up the stairs without me or anyone else noticing and walked right past my sleeping baby. It would have taken seconds for her to pick her up and walk back out. My husband and stepdad caught up with her up the road and retrieved a purse that she'd stolen from a barmaid's bag. Honestly, I just went completely weak with the thought of what could have happened. Dd was never out of my sight after that I can tell you!

spacedonkey · 15/12/2004 16:36

I don't think anyone is suggesting that opportunistic thefts occur, of course they do, but I still maintain that the chances of a random paedophile happening to pass by and snatch your child from inside your house are extremely small.

spacedonkey · 15/12/2004 16:36

don't occur, that should say

mistletoe · 15/12/2004 16:40

Yes but Whitexmas, there are not squillions of people out there looking to steal a baby. As you say, this woman walked past your baby, probably taking advantage of the open door to look for a handbag or wallet to steal. There are opportunist thieves around.

The chances of a child being left alone, just as someone wanting to steal a baby passes by is very very VERY small.

We have been trying to say that such risks to our children are highly over-estimated in today's society, and we should worry less and live more.

mistletoe · 15/12/2004 16:40

SD you type more quickly than I

aloha · 15/12/2004 16:44

Totally agree that the dangers of childstealing/babysnatching etc are wildly, wildly over-exaggerated. It's incredibly, vanishingly rare. But also, re the earlier post, paedophiles haven't just been invented! A few people have always got their sexual kicks from children.

motherinfestivemood · 15/12/2004 16:46

God yes. The only difference 10 years ago is that child abuse wasn't as widely recognised.

spacedonkey · 15/12/2004 16:48

In fact I would think that children are less likely to fall victim to paedophiles now than ever before because it has become so high profile.

TinselTamum · 15/12/2004 16:49

I would be so much more worried about a toddler being left unattended and being able to open the door and run out than I would about a paedophile grabbing him/her. There's just more hysteria nowadays, not more of a threat.

TinselTamum · 15/12/2004 16:50

Whoops, meant to say running out into the road, didn't make that very clear, sorry.

mistletoe · 15/12/2004 16:51

You know, I find it such a relief to find that people agree with me on this. Sometimes I think maybe I'm just careless, or very naive.

spacedonkey · 15/12/2004 16:53

It worries me that a whole generation of children are growing up in a climate of misplaced fear

mistletoe · 15/12/2004 16:57

Yes me too. They are not learning to take care of themselves, they are just learning to fear and mis-trust the whole world.

ZCMUM · 15/12/2004 17:07

One thought...We all think it would never happen to US, not to OUR children, I expect people who it has happened to thought exactly the same! On the other hand, it is a very rare occurance and the sad truth is that thousands of children are at risk of abuse from their very own parents in this country everyday, maybe we should think about these children and do what we can to help rather than get involved in this media hyped mass panic which makes us think every slightly odd, lone man is a paedophile just waiting for us to turn our backs before swooping down to steal our children! Take necessary precautions but being overly obbsessed with keeping your child safe, will eventually only harm them!

mistletoe · 15/12/2004 17:14

But we all get in and out of cars/trains etc everyday, without thinking constantly "I might be killed or maimed in an accident while travelling"

Yet that is a far far higher risk than that of our children being abducted or molested.

We just have to get on with the business of living. Yes be vigilant for your safety, but not to the point of paranoia

ZCMUM · 15/12/2004 17:20

I suppose we worry because it is the one most singularly horrible thing that we imagine could possibly happen! Life is full of millions of more likely dangers but they aren't as upsetting or scary When a child goes missing and it's on the news, all of us as parents feel a minute amount of the kind of pain that the child's parents are going through, the thought of this happening to our beloved children is too painfull to think about

whitepixmas · 15/12/2004 17:31

I know there aren't paedophiles on every corner and I'm one of the first to complain about ridiculous paranoia in schools (not videoing plays or having dads help with swimming etc). I also try very hard not to project my fears on to the children (In fact it would be very difficult because they speak to 'strangers' all the time in the pub)and although I watch them in the park I don't make a big thing of it to them and let them play in peace.

However, when my dh and stepdad confronted this woman it was obvious that she was either on drink or drugs. A friend of ours was actually attacked by a woman he found when he walked into his own bedroom.

I'm aware that these were very rare occurrances and certainly not suggesting that we should all walk around in a state of constant fear, just pointing out that the original post is not necessarily an 'urban myth'.

Also, at the time we had our intruder there had been a couple of recent cases of babies being stolen from hospitals, and this woman had obviously seen me come in and followed me on purpose. I think I could be forgiven for being paranoid at the time.