Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

News

Sad story re; baby Chloe.

66 replies

LIZS · 04/07/2006 14:33

Story here - WARNING : don't read if sensitive to baby cruelty stories. Just beggars belief .... poor baby, where were those who should have protected her ?

OP posts:
tinyFox · 04/07/2006 21:55

Omg that is soo sad,

Beauregard · 04/07/2006 21:58

Cant bear to look at the link as i fear i would never stop crying.

saadia · 04/07/2006 22:09

It's utterly heartbreaking to think of what that defenceless baby endured - and just proves again that judges have totally lost the plot. And why on earth did the doctors at the hospital not call in Social Services?

calebsmum · 05/07/2006 21:10

\link{http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/wales/south_east/5145676.stm\here]

She was on an at risk register and still nothing was done. This could have been so easily prevented. Poor poor baby, glad those bastards have had their names and pictures posted in the papers, hope someone beats them to death

calebsmum · 05/07/2006 21:10

sorry it's here

description

1Baby1Bump · 05/07/2006 21:22

if an animal was found with fractures, it would be removed by the rspca immediately and the owners would never be allowed to keep animals again.
this baby was left to die and these tossers (for want of a stronger word) will go on to have more kids, like the woman who left her baby in a dirty nappy so long she got nappy rash that resulted in blood poisoning and killed her.
it makes me so f'ing mad, it really does.

flutterbee · 05/07/2006 21:37

This type of thing just makes me cry my heart out, how can you try to teach a baby to walk at that age. I can just imagine them sat there laughing at what they were doing, that poor poor baby.

How the hell can this keep happening, tiny deffenceless babies allowed home to be killed by the people who should be looking after and protecting them.

When I sit and think about it I really can't understand, I just can't understand how people do this.

1Baby1Bump · 05/07/2006 21:39

i dont know how someone can carry a baby and give birth to it, only to kill it later, slowly and painfully.
its just making me madder and madder.
im off.

muma3 · 05/07/2006 21:41

i was 15 when i had my baby and was very much aware of what a baby needed . it is no excuse im afraid

1Baby1Bump · 05/07/2006 21:43

exactly! how can you think a baby could walk at 14 weeks? you just know it cant.

these people obviously wanted her dead. i dont believe anyone is that thick ffs.

gothicmama · 05/07/2006 21:47

lets hope taht all the new legislation adn workinhg together guidance since Chloes death in 2003 help to prevent it happenning again

edam · 05/07/2006 21:50

Poor baby.

The parents were stupid and cruel. But it looks as if at least the mother may not have had a clue because she had dreadful childhood herself. It's not an excuse, but it could be that she just did not have the tiniest idea of very basic childcare. Which is where you would hope the professionals would step in, show her what to do and make sure she did it. Tragic that they managed to miss the opportunities to save this poor baby.

1Baby1Bump · 05/07/2006 21:54

agree the pros are at fault here, but didnt the girl have a voice in her head saying 'this is wrong'?
natural instints tell u to cradle a baby and not much else surely?
(im not having a go by the way!)

Caligula · 06/07/2006 11:14

"It is also easy to know the basics of being a human being though maddie. Basic instinct is you don't hurt babies"

Unfortunately, people who themselves have been hurt as babies don't have this basic instinct. There's this tendency to assume that we all have a basic instinct that is more or less basic to being human, but if that instinct is damaged, then there is very good evidence that the normal empathetic responses will not develop. I can't remember where I read it but it's something about neural pathways linking and needing good eye contact, care etc., which if it's not forthcoming, will delay or prevent the development of what the rest of us regard as basic instinct. (Someone else more scientific than me will come along and explain it properly, perhaps.)

Time and time again, when you look at stories of people who have abused children, they almost invariably have been themselves abused as children. It's very rare for someone from a happy, normal family, to abuse their child. Which is why it's so important to break the cycle. Unfortunately, the powers that be seem to be going through a fashion at the moment of seeing all parents as potential abusers and therefore not wanting to make value judgements about parents who are probably going to have extra difficulty bonding with their babies and treating them properly, because of their own lack of care in their own childhoods.

On one level of course we're all potential abusers, but in the RW, it would make much more sense to stop treating all parents with suspicion and to focus attention and resources on parents who are obviously in need of more support than average. But that would involve making some very uncomfortable judgements, which the professions involved seem strangely reluctant to do. They'd rather just pretend all parents are dodgy and treat us accordingly. Meanwhile these poor children (and their poor hopeless parents) are just left to suffer.

Flamesparrow · 06/07/2006 11:25

And here is me sat sobbing last night because my baby was crying because I had hurt him (the "hurt" being that I had given him jabs and he is getting over them....) - I just cannot comprehend how anyone could do it.

But I have seen so many very very messed up children coming through foster care, they are broken at a very early age, and no amount of tlc when they are older is enough to fix them properly - I can see how it happens when they have a child of their own

KathyMCMLXXII · 06/07/2006 11:27

VG post Caligula, specially the last para.

expatinscotland · 06/07/2006 11:30

And I can also see that we can't tar everyone w/the same brush.

My SIL was removed by the state from her heroin-addicted birth parents for abuse and neglect when she was 4.

She was adopted by my ILs, who were her first foster parents.

She had a baby at 18 and another just 14 months later.

She's a fantastic mum to her two boys and has now retrained and is working in a top hair salon in town centre. Her boys are 8 and 7 now.

She wouldn't have dreamt of harming a defenseless baby. As she said, how can you NOT know that's wrong?

biglips · 06/07/2006 11:34

"He did not cause her death. He did not assault her. He was reckless rather than deliberate". so that makes it ok then????? i would send my DP round to his house - if i knew where he lives - and beats the shit out of him with his hands tied back - as he wont beable to defend himself JUST LIKE THE POOR LITTLE BABY - ggggrrrrr

expatinscotland · 06/07/2006 11:39

not to worry, big, i'm sure there are plenty of other inmates who will kick hte shit out of him regularly.

her, too.

Caligula · 06/07/2006 11:41

Exactly Expat - that's part of what makes it so difficult, because you can't just say "OK, you had a really bad upbringing so we're going to supervise you more closely than other parents who had a good upbringing as far as we know". It would be like punishing them for the fact that they had lousy parents and just assuming that they're automatically going to be crap too. There are people who had horrendous upbringings who still manage to understand the needs of their own children and don't follow the patterning of their own childhoods.

jenkel · 06/07/2006 11:54

"misguided by youth and immaturity', what total rubbish.

DH's Mum was 18 when she had him and on her own.

My god daughters mother was 15 when she had her, and she has done a fantastic job in bringing her up, she is now a very well grounded 8 year old.

And to escape jail......

At times like this no faith in the british justice system.

Nemo1977 · 06/07/2006 12:20

that is disgraceful. How can that judge come out with that crap...so the father had to take a bit more responsibility so bloody what!!!!! I am seething at the fact they have basically gotten away with it even my 2 yr old knows his sister has milk and nothing else and that she cant walk so he has ot be gentle. Ok I understand they had terrible upbringings but so have a lot of people. I find it odd that they treated their daughter that way but still continued to take her to the baby clinic. Also surely they would have been recieving milk tokens for the baby.

Overrun · 06/07/2006 12:45

Look I am not saying that SSD didn't make mistakes, along with police, hospital etc, however mistakes are always going to happen when resources are so stretched.
It's always the same story, social workers do good work and save countless children, and then sometimes you don't get it right (terrible I know),and it's slag off social services time.
People always want to blame some one when something awful happens, but unfortunately there can never be an absalutely foolproof system where no child ever gets killed/abuse again.

If the public were not so anti social services in general then that might help Social services depts negogiating power with government for more money or resources. I notice when Unison strikes, much is made of teachers being off but social workers are not given a mention (as who cares about them).
Take my word for it, more children will be abused if we continue to recruit less and less social workers becasue of poor pay, lack of resources and the fear of being hated

Caligula · 06/07/2006 17:00

True, but SS wouldn't be so hated if they didn't go in for loony fashions like satanic abuse and msbp. They seem to be extremely vulnerable to any new fad which proves that normal parents are actually mad nutters whose sole reason for having children, was in order to abuse them.

When you look at how the children in the satanic abuse scandal were treated, and you note that the people responsible are still working in social work, you simply cannot give them any professional credibility. If they were a real profession, the people who had orchestrated what happened to those kids would have been drummed out years ago. Instead, they were promoted and they are still working in child protection. That frankly gives me no confidence whatsoever in the profession.

Overrun · 06/07/2006 17:28

Caligua,
I do have to say, that whilst those mistakes were made, this was not endemic to every SSD. the media has a big part to play in all this, as I think it has in lots of issues
It cottons on to something and over emphasises things and gets it out of proportion.
As for MSBP, like most people I think what happened to those poor women over the cot death was appaling. That doesn't mean that Mothers don't hurt their children (as we know from the original post) Mothers do things that seem completely at odds with maternal instinct. I Wouldn't rule out MSBP, as I think it does happen in isolated cases.
People have to think about the contradictions (not saying this specifically to you Caligua), about not wanting another baby harmed ever and berating SSD for not removing a child, but also being the first to point the finger when they do.