People feeling under pressure to wear a poppy.

[schroeder]

Yesterday on the bbc news a very interesting conversation about the increasing pressure people feel to wear a poppy seemed about to start, but was cut short. It was something to do with football shirts I think.

I feel this is a conversation that should be had. I work with the public and feel uncomfortable every year when it is expected of me to wear one.

It's not the wearing so much that bothers me, but that in doing so I am supporting a charity I would not support otherwise.
Surely we should not all feel forced to give to this charity whether we like it or not?
I do not think even the British legion woud want poppies to be compulsary?

[chibi]

cory could you name any charities for civillians damaged by war i am v interested

[meditrina]

cory : the servicemen (and women) do not get to pick and choose where they are sent. That's the job of the politicians.

[jenniec79]

I agree with the concept of wearing a poppy entirely.

I just wish the damn things would stay on, not fall apart or look decidedly wilted after about 5 minutes.

I've already destroyed 2 this year. Now I don't have one, but will replace at some point tomorrow. And Tuesday. And every day till the 11th I guess. The typical person to see me during the next week will probably assume I'm not supporting the Poppy appeal at all.

[DumSpiroSpero]

Indeed, some people may have reasons not to want to support the military, because they do not agree with every conflict the UK has been involved with for instance.

The decision to get involved in these situations/conflicts is made by politicians, not by 'the military'.

I can only assume you don't actually know anyone who is a soldier/in the RAF/Navy etc, or I imagine you would have a very different perspective.

[GwendolineMaryLacey]

I work with veterans, I worked with WW1 veterans when they were still alive. People wearing poppies meant the world to them. It showed them that that horrors they endured were not forgotten. I always wore one but I make doubly sure I wear one now.

[mayorquimby]

Yes and people join the military knowing what they are likely to get in to.
I'm not anti-military I just don't see it as anything more than a job which someone signs up for knowing full well what they are signing up for, I certainly don't view them as heroes. Some members of the military will be great people, some will be utter thugs and dickheads, same as in every other walk of life.

[meditrina]

"could you name any charities for civillians damaged by war i am v interested"

This question wasn't aimed at me, but the one's I can think off from the top of my head are WarChild, Emergency UK (life support for civilian war victims), and The Halo Trust.

There are also a plethora of other charities,in addition to RBL, which deal with the human cost of war: SSAFA, BLESMA, St Dunstans, The Not Forgotten Trust, The Sir Oswald Stoll Foundation and the various service specific Benevolent Societies.

As former National Servicemen, and their widows can be assisted by the many of the military charities; there are still huge swathes of the population eligible for assistance.

[mayorquimby]

don't know why but the 2nd half of my post got chopped:it read

my uncle was in the RAF during ww2, he's someone I'm immensely proud to have known. He and every other person in that war fought for the freedom of others to hold views which others may not agree with or may even find contemptable. If people do to wish to remember or pay tribute to veterans then that is their right.

[chibi]

Thanks meditrina

[SauvignonBlanche]

I'm happy to wear one, have the small, unobtrusive metal one for my work uniform but do find it irrtating that you don't see anyone on TV (except for John Snow) without one.
They can't all be wearing them by choice compared to the % of the population that wear one.

[JujyFruits]

This is such a non issue to me...sometimes I think I live on a different planet to the rest of mumsnet.

I have never worn a poppy. Not for any particular reason, I just don't. No one has ever commented on this.

I don't even notice if someone is wearing one or not.

[MoreSpamThanGlam]

I have never felt pressurised, but I do feel that it is becoming a them and us thing. I wear my poppy, and it is a private mark of respect. The Facebook vitriol that starts this time of year does my head in. if you dont like our poppy, get out of our country. just masked racism I think.

But agree that it does seem that for tv presenters or those in the public eye at a certain level, they have to wear a poppy and that is no choiuce or freedom to choose at all unless they want to be seen as unpatriotic and therefore evil or spiteful in some way.

[schroeder]

activate, I think you are deliberately misundertanding me.

[activate]

"It's not the wearing so much that bothers me, but that in doing so I am supporting a charity I would not support otherwise.
Surely we should not all feel forced to give to this charity whether we like it or not?
I do not think even the British legion woud want poppies to be compulsary?"

it is your choice to wear or not

it was not a choice for them to go to war and fight for our rights to freedom

it is your right to support whatever charity you wish

and your right to ignore what has gone before if you wish

I find it sad

[activate]

I feel equally enraged by twattish-celebrity who choose to wear 'fashion' poppies

disgusting

[Popbiscuit]

I don't wear a poppy because I find them annoying; they always fall off or someone sits on one etc. I do however put money in the poppy box.
The poppy discussion always reminds me of the Seinfeld episode where Kramer refuses to wear the AIDS ribbon

[schroeder]

I too find it sad that some people feel pressurised to wear them.

It is not a matter of ignoring what has gone before.

[crystalglasses]

I wear a poppy as a mark of respect and remembrance in relation to my greatgrandparents, parents and all those who fought and died in 1914-18 and 39-45 wars.

[activate]

of course it is a choice to ignore what has gone before

pressurised into demonstrating respect may well be a good thing

pressurised into slowing / stopping your car when on the road with a funeral procession

pressurised into caring about other people

all good

[zippadeedoodaa]

Always nice when people come on threads and name call Personally I prefer a bit of reasoned debate.

[schroeder]

The poppy is not a simple symbol, it represents different things to different people.

Some of those things are entirely uncontentious others not so much.

What I would like to discuss and I know it's not very mumsnet to keep on topic, but the issue for me is the pressure those in the public eye are under, to wear the poppy.

Also why it is that the bbc seems to make an exception for poppies?

[meditrina]

The confounding factor in this is that the poppy isn't the same as a charity sticker or badge or whatever. It's also the symbol of the national, and Commonwealth, non-partisan Act of Remembrance for the dead and harmed of all wars.

But - as I posted above - it's totally up to the individual if they want to participate.

Here are two shameless lifts from an old discussion of "poppy facism" from a site strongly associated with the military:

"I have to say, as someone who works for the Legion as a volunteer, that this "he/she is not wearing a poppy!" stuff is starting to look awfully like political correctness in another guise. Surely quiet persuasion and reason are going to get further than an aggressive assertion that we are right and everyone who disagrees is wrong? Why alienate people by going completely over the top (no pun intended)?"

"In some countries around the world you can be dragged into the streets and be hanged / shot etc etc for not having a beard / not doing this / doing that etc etc. Think on. [...] I still have some choice left - and I will be eternally grateful to brave forebears for allowing me that choice to the day I die, despite the best efforts of some of the clowns who masquerade as politicians who are trying to fcuking run my life.

I wear a poppy with pride - because I choose to. And I am fcuking grateful for that right"

[activate]

on the contrary the poppy is a very simple symbol

[LRDtheFeministDragon]

Well, obviously not, or this thread wouldn't be here..