Child been put on SEN register

[GladAmberOtter]

So as the title suggests my child has neen put on SEN register at school. The reason im posting here is because i know that a lot of who home educate have an issue with the school system and pigeon holing. My DC is 5.4 one of the youngest in the class and we knew she was a bit behind, but not this much!! They want to ‘close ‘ gaps and say it may not be permanant. My reservations about thd school system are coming true! I just believe she is learning at her own pace and should not be measured or compared to anybody else. Obviously im concerned, sny ex teachers here who can clarify? Are the standards too high?

Yes they all learn at different paces. The school system is designed for square pegs and if you get a round one, it can be difficult for the child and the teacher. By all means, home educate if you feel this isn't the fit for her.

I would suggest that any help to catch up is a good thing. Yes, other countries don't even start until 6, but she isn't in their system. It will get harder for if she can't keep up and she will probably internalise that. It's not the system I would choose given unlimited resources, but it is the system we have.

Honestly don’t panic. One of mine was very slow to learn to read. Was on the SEN register and is now at Cambridge.

Thank you. Kind of astounded by some of the responses on here, you can’t question anything without somebody jining on you!

What are you questioning?

That's the part I don't understand.

Factually, your child is currently significantly behind the attainment of her peers. Taking this into account, the school have decided to place her on the SEN register and access so more support and intervention.

Are you questioning the teacher judgement?
Are you questioning the other kids attaining above her?
Are you questioning the government?
Are you questioning her being on the register, if so why don't you like her being on there?

You'd be more frustrated if she was "fine" and couldn't read by 8.

Your entitlement is astounding. So many children - both who have been pulled out into home Ed and who struggle on in school - would be desperate to get onto the register to get the support they need rather than struggling.

I’m not objecting. But obviously as a parent you worry, and you do wonder how they are measuring this, are the standards too high. I don’t know know, more surprises me is the level of awful responses, like yours to my question, that’s all.

My entitlement? I’m not expecting anything. Wow. I’m asking a question to get perspective. Against my intuition I wish I hadn’t asked any questions on here, because you get shitty responses like yours.

Are what standards too high? The school will be using data that is standardised across the school and country as well as comparing your child with every other child in the year group. It's a normal way of identifying children who need extra support.

But as had already been pointed out, you've chosen the wrong place to complain about your child getting proactive and timely help. Something that many posters on this board would have sold their soul for, and have had to home educate because their child wasn't given it.

You need to read the room.

I would embrace it then. Early intervention is key. If they offer extra support now that's brilliant.

That.

I'm almost certain the standards aren't too high to not be on the SEN register in Y1. You could ask what the criteria are and see for yourself if you want?

Have they given you any ideas to support at home?

My child's on the SEND register it's largely just for admin for school staff, she's literally a genius - children are put on there for all sorts of reasons, for DD it's because she's autistic, is ahead in all subjects and needs more challenge and needs a quiet room for tests etc. For others it might be because they are having SLT or see an OT.

It is a very fluid list and child move on and off depending on need. If your child is on the list because she is behind then the focus should be on helping her catch up by doing holistic activities at home that help with school skills, lots of reading to her, lots of play DOH and plasticine play to build up muscles in her fingers for writing, lots of board game playing to develop social skills and turn taking

Yes, entitlement. The attitude that you know more about your child's achievement with respect to their peers than their qualified teaching staff, and the assumption that because your child isn't achieving this the standards are "too high".
One of my children has SEN. The questions I asked the school were based around him as an individual, not about targets. What is it that he isn't achieving with respect to his peers? Why is that worrying and what does it mean for his development? What support can we all put in place to achieve that? Can we help by getting an assessment to bring extra support into the school for him?
Many children don't flourish in school because of the WAY things are taught - as a PP pointed out it's hard with 30 of differing levels. The SEN register allows your child to access that.

My two cents…

I have two summer born boys, one is an academic high flyer, and near top of the class so never an issue. The second has struggled much more. When he was in year 1 I was convinced something was not right and fought like crazy to get his teachers to understand. I was gaslit, ignored, and prevented from talking to the SENCo. Fast forward, he’s in year 4, still massively struggling, and was diagnosed with dyslexia last year. I would give anything for his needs to be picked up sooner and support to be put in place. The emotional toll on him has been significant.

DD has an EHCP, thank goodness, after years of not getting the support she needed and therefore constantly feeling she was stupid and a failure because she struggled with things the other children found easy.

But by all means blame 'the system' if you like.

OP, it’s never nice to hear that your child is struggling and it sounds like this came as a shock to you. But as you’ve heard so many times on this thread, early identification is a good thing and it doesn’t define a child’s future. The best thing you can do (which I’m sure you’re doing already) is work with the school to find out exactly what their concerns are and see what you can do to support your child at home.

My experience of summer borns is the opposite. Quite a lot is put down to being “a summer born - they will catch up” that maybe shouldn’t.

Particularly with boys I think. My nephew had everything explained by “summer born boy” for years until eventually it became really obvious that something was very wrong. Which turned out to be (at least partially) an eyesight problem. Seems it was much easier to learn to read when you can actually see the words. Who knew!

My DS6 was put on the SEN register last year in year 1. His reading was behind and he was put in a group with a few others to do 2 extra reading classes a week to try and catch up. He isn't into reading at all so it was like pulling teeth at home trying to do homework, where as he's pretty advanced in other areas. Tbh me and his dad bribed him to read a book or 2 every night and we did phonics flash cards with him. 2 months later he passed his phonics test and start of year 2 he has gone up reading levels so he's at the same level expected. He's not on the SEN register anymore, but glad it was flagged up to us so we could fix it.
What is it in particular your child is behind with? Is it something you can just practise and practise at home? It is a shock to find out your child is behind, but as an only child I wouldn't have known otherwise.

Sorry but that is not the same thing - thats aiming to get all children to a benchmark at least.
You will not get all children to the same standard as children are of varying abilities naturally.

Okay, you wanted a home ed perspective and here's mine. I have a learning disabled teen who has always been home educated.

Mainstream school is predicated on the assumption that all kids will be more or less learning the same things at the same age in the same way. If they can't, they will have problems.

In theory teachers can differentiate for kids who are at different levels. In practice, one teacher with dozens of kids in a busy classroom is not going to be able to fully meet the needs of kids with diverse abilities or learning styles, no matter how talented and dedicated the teacher is. It's just a limitation of the mass instruction model. If your child is going to stay in school, you and the school do need to figure out how she compares with the other kids in her class so you and school staff can try to help her get by in the classroom environment.

I absolutely understand why you find that hard to stomach. So would I. It has been brilliant for my home educated special-needs child that she does not have to have her needs constantly formally assessed, because she can get a targeted education without that. She was over ten before she even knew that if she were in the school system, people would consider that there was something wrong with her. Home ed has been the making of her.

On Mumsnet when posters complain about school, I often hear people replying rather snippily, "If you don't like how school does things, home educate." I say to you more kindly, "If you don't like how school does things, home educate." Would that be an option for you? Is that why you posted here?

I say to you more kindly, "If you don't like how school does things, home educate." Would that be an option for you? Is that why you posted here?

This. You're not going to change the school system over night. If you're not happy that they want to give your child extra support to try and help them then it would be a good idea to look I to teaching your child yourself at home. Then you can do it exactly how you want to.

Several of my friends HE, mostly they ended up HE because the school let down their child, because they asked for support and didn't get it, because their child's needs weren't met. You're complaining your child is being offered extra support. They haven't been labelled they've been given support because their teacher thinks they need it. That's not a bad thing. All 3 of my DC are summer born, one always did well, one always did brilliantly, one really struggled and extra support has been the difference between him being well behind peers and catching up, in fact went from 2 years behind in maths to a year ahead. He wouldn't be there without the extra support. Some kids need extra support early on. Early internet can make a real difference to outcomes. It is hard for schools with budgets cut to the bone to fund anyhing extra, they wouldn't be doing this if they didnt think in their experience that your DD needs more support and her school and teacher are the experts here so I'd suggest listening with an open mind not a reactive one.

People aren't being shitty, there is a lot of heart ache and hurt to their children behind the reason that many HE home educate. Sometimes it's a proactive choice, often it's a reactive choice and you're complaining about getting the very thing there kids desperately needed. I have had years and years of countless battles with school and school can't and anxiety and sensory issues and SEN and learning delays and poorly done adjustments that made the situation worse and my kids school is actually fairly good as things go. I know I've been more fortunate then my friends who have had to HE and that fortune came down to being in the area for a school that has been good enough, not great but good enough. You're complaining you have a proactive school that wants to support your child. It really is a very entitled way to view it.

Thank you for considered response, sadly I seem to be a victim of a horrible toxic supply of responses. Yours was at least considered. I wanted a home ed view partly because ( knowing many teachers and having worked in education ) the frustration of the system itself the rigid ness of it, of course they can’t go forward without comparison, however, we know that such comparisons can be highly damaging for kids, of course if you hear the words SEN you do worry as a parent ( my child isn’t matching up - is it done thing I did blah blah. What I see from the home ed community, despite knowing that people choose to home ed for all different reasons, one being that SEN requirements not being met. I do t want to moan about the school system, she’s in it, I have issues with it from
my own experiences and of course some choose alternatives precisely for those reasons, I don’t have the option to home ed now, but would consider it in the future, if I felt it was right. I just wanted a different perspective it wasn’t about a big conspiracy or that I don’t think the teachers want the best!

I’m pretty certain there isn’t such thing as an SEN ‘register’ and I have a child myself with SEN.

For a start I aNOT complaining. I just wanted a different perspective, and yes I’ve had some heartfelt responses and some shitty ones. Read through. Not once have I complained that my child will receive extra support. I know it’s a good thing, but I do want to know how this compares, can we be expecting too much and some people have taken their children out. I know it’s for a myriad of things not just one thing. Of course as a parent you become concerned by the words SEN but I was asking for different perspectives not a load of toxic responses where people have decided I’m moaning about my child receiving extra support. Nonsense. I have not complained about that at all, it’s what this thread has decided.