Dropping out of HE threads

[discoverlife]

Because I getting so fed up of having to repeat and defend myself to people who are so negative about the whole idea of HE they carry on arguments into the realms of autonomous versus structured just to be able to point the finger and say that you can't trust children to teach themselves and they don't HE themselves so don't have a bloody clue.
To those of you who want none of the argumentative discussions about HE please join Education Otherwise and join us on the forums.
All this argueing is likely to put real parents with real problems off even asking on Mumsnet.

Julienoshoes, no, your posts are invariably informative and unhysterical, and I appreciate what you do on the HE threads. It's just a general thing, really.

I can see where you're coming from DL, it does become rather frustrating at times, and in general there do seem to be a few people who regularly wade in on threads which are not 'debate threads' but which then descend into 'why do you all hate schools' arguments.
I'm not for censoring at all but it does seem like sometimes there is nowhere to go for a chat on MN without someone toddling along 'with no experience of home ed, BUT'. Oh and then they shriek 'you're all defensive and attacking personally' and I just end up thinking I've got no time for this at all.
However, when we were thinking about HE these threads were invaluable, truly informative and reading posts from filly, jns, juule suebaroo hc and esp runnerbean to name a few made me feel a part of something before we actually were iyswim.
So I guess what I'm rambling up to is; don't go, stay and don't get drawn in to the idiotic comments from some, because just..maybe just, someone like me will come along and need some advice/support

Great post, sorky.

I have determined to hang around on these threads (although I often have to write a post, delete it, have a cup of tea and come back to it! )

I have actually blocked HE from my topics list, so the threads don't come up in active convos for me. That way I just go in and browse through the topic when I'm feeling battle-ready!

Because, as Sorky said, it is vital that we are around, in case someone who needs advice and support about HE comes along.

DL, I know exactly what you mean though.

One thing that does wrestle a wry grin from my lips is when we are all accused of being defensive and insulting.

When you consider some of the names people end up calling each other on the parent and toddler threads, or note the vitriol rolling off the screen from the selling boards, it makes me laugh that we are not able to reply to/attempt to enlighten ill-informed posters who make incorrect comments about HE, without being accused of various misdemeanours.

I imagine that if I waded into a thread on BLW (about which I know nothing) and stated that the parents who did it were harming their children, that it will damage them for life, and it will mean that they will never be able to socialise properly with children that weren't exposed to BLW, no-one would be surprised if those who do support BLW gave me short shrift?

I hope no-one minds me sticking my nose in, but I wanted to say that the HE threads are one of the things I really like about MN. DH and I were both happy and did well at school, and intend to send dd to the local schools. BUT, I knew nothing at all about home ed before joining MN, and probably had some very stupid preconceived notions about it. Reading threads here has shown me just how diverse and interesting it is, and I'm hoping that when dd does go to school I'll be able to pick up tips and ideas from HE which will allow me to help and support here. So thank you - just wanted you to know that not everyone who likes schools thinks you're bonkers!

I don't think people who HE are 'bonkers', in certain circumstances I would do it myself. Equally those who support the school system are not 'damaging 'their children. One size does't fit all, never has done and never will do. Everyone has individual learning styles.
The important thing is not what suits you as the parent, but what suits your child. I think it is very useful to remind people that there is more than one opinion (probably as many opinions as posters!)It is, after all, an open thread on a public board.

I totally agree with you Habbibu. I don't think home ed is likely to be a part of my life (unless money issues improve MARKEDLY) but it has been really interesting to learn more about it from people who do it.

And I think for some people it must be really important to have this 'on tap'.

The only thing I have ever said that I absolutely know REALLY shocked my MIL was that I would love to HE my DS. He is an only child - and she was honestly shocked and appalled at that thought and I know she would genuinely see it as akin to child cruelty. There are a lot of people out there who need a lot of help to understand it and I think these threads are invaluable.

Completely agree with AbbeyA

I would never say never

Discoverlife,

Never really talked to you directly but I have always found your postings very interesting. I can understand how you must get fed up with repeating/defending yourself constantly (even I got fed up on 3D's thread when people were asking the same questions/putting forward same opinions as had been discussed and answered pages ago!), it did make me want to scream at times, go back and actually read the thread!! But, without these threads people like me would never be introduced to the concept of HE. I did realise it was legal (in fact the year I spent out of school the LEA didn't care one bit about my education) but I had all the normal pre-conceptions about HE which these threads help to shatter or at least think them through. I remain underdecided on whether to HE or school, but I actually feel that I have a choice now, both as valid as each other. I have found them fascinating and although they can be filled with people who have no experience of HE, giving very strong anti HE comments, what is intersting is how the mis-conceptions are countered which can only be done by someone who HE's.

Discoverlife, julien, as a secondary school teacher Iinitially I never 'got' HE. But your posts are so--o interesting, thank-you for enlightening us all. I'm sorry its so exhausting.

btw I feel like that in real life trying to defend private schools and how they don't all turn out arrogant,spoily brainy city types!

As Dory says.." just keep swimming..."

I love these threads and often talk about them to my HE friends. I would love to HE but just cant afford it and it is a job ime. Dont stop though as I can but dream.