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Higher education

Talk to other parents whose children are preparing for university on our Higher Education forum.

Original poster

Anyone whose DD or DS had a disastrous Oxbridge interview....

392 replies

Supermanspants · 07/12/2015 18:41

..... and managed to get an offer?
Hideous interview today. Grilled on a topic she hasn't even covered in her A level course and based purely on a 7 page academic article she only got half an hour before the interview.
She is so down about it all.

OP posts:
Brioche201 · 09/12/2015 16:59

Oh dear this has made me worried! DD thought her maths interview went really well and that seems to be a bad sign!!t she could do all the questions they gave her unaided and answer their questions on what she was doing.
Molio- have seen you post a bit on these threads.are you an academic or a parent of Oxbridge students?

DinoSnores · 09/12/2015 17:10

I wouldn't be concerned just because a candidate thought that an exam was going well.

For example, I had a postgrad exam, part of which I really genuinely enjoyed. My examiners wanted me to show off what I knew and challenged me to work through things, I knew my stuff, we enjoyed (I think - they gave me excellent marks) the banter back and forth of sharing knowledge. That all sounds a bit cheesy but it is being challenged and then dealing with that is the important thing.

Molio · 09/12/2015 18:05

I'm able to triangulate info to some extent Brioche but I've had six DC through the system recently, yes (since you ask). None this year however.

Marianne it's whatever suits the DC in question. Mine have actively wanted to talk about their interviews as well as rooms/ people etc. If you're in Oxford during the interview period you'll hear DC on mobiles all over town talking to a parent about interviews. Presumably Cambridge is the same, although perhaps slightly less because there's less staying over.

I'm not sure there's any problem about feeling an interview went well but an interview where there didn't seem to be any challenge might ring an alarm bell. But of course it's possible that the interviewee might simply be brighter than the tutor - someone's likely to be!

MarianneSolong · 09/12/2015 18:13

Well obviously I'm saying what I'd do/what I did as a parent and step-parent. I think children - young people - get hugely het up - and while this is entirely understandable, I think my job as an older person has been to say, this is absolutely not the end of the world.

I'm not some kind of performance coach. I'm a mother. And I think one of the things I can do is try and impart some sense of perspective. (Rather than engaging in prolonged discussions about Engels or whatever on the end of a phone.)

Molio · 09/12/2015 18:29

Marianne I'm just saying, like you, that the sole aim is to help them along and keep perspective - especially (as far as I'm concerned) if they think they've had a really shitty interview but still have one or more to go. Prolonged discussions about Engels sounds extremely pretentious. Good luck to any child with a parent like that. Trying to listen to what they said and persuade them it wasn't truly a car crash is something else entirely. But all these kids will be different. It's just whatever suits.

MarianneSolong · 09/12/2015 18:32

Agreed.

I just wonder if it's easy to get over-involved. What's the right degree of involvement I ask/was asking myself? I think I was beginning to consciously pull away a bit at that stage. (While also quite actively helping to sort practical stuff/respond to evidence of distress too.)

disquisitiones · 09/12/2015 18:39

Maths at Cambridge works differently to most other subjects: many more offers subject to STEP are made than there are places, so it is STEP rather than interview which is the deciding factor. That means that Cambridge maths interviews are less definitive than for other subjects, and perhaps shouldn't be compared to others.

Feeling like a maths interview went well can't always indicate whether an offer is going to be given: it could be that the interview went well and challenging questions were answered, or it could also be that questions were answered correctly but rather slowly and laboriously, so higher level questions were not given. Similarly feeling like the interview went poorly is not on its own definitive as some interviewers ask tougher questions than others and push harder (although if a student couldn't get far with any question that would be pretty indicative).

I suspect it's far more common for maths and sciences candidates to be confident they did well though and to be accurate about it: I recall having good interviews and after comparing my answers with those of other candidates I knew that I indeed did a lot better than they did. Answers are not subjective in maths.

Hassled · 09/12/2015 19:20

Thank you all for your useful links and general reassurance. The boy is home, frazzled but alive, having been pooled today - and now we'll just enjoy Christmas and think of anything other than Oxbridge!

horsemadmom · 09/12/2015 20:40

Questions for the experts- DD was one of a handful who had an extra interview at another college. She really didn't like the college. Really, really didn't like it. She is now convinced that her offer will come from that college and is adamant that she will turn it down. I've heard all the stuff about everyone eventually loving the college that they end up at but DD has valid reasons for not liking this college.
Is her fear founded?
Can she turn them down, take a gap year and reapply next year to another college? Will it count against her if she rejects an offer this year?
Pure speculation and panic on her part but she really had a visceral dislike of the 2nd college.

Brioche201 · 09/12/2015 20:41

I've had six DC through the system

wow SIX!! (faints)
You definitely are an old hand at this malarkey then!

MalhamWaterfall · 09/12/2015 20:45

horse - it won't count against her.

But, is she sure she has valid reasons? Could they be valid but temporary - after all, 1/3 of the undergrad student body moves on every year, for example?

Brioche201 · 09/12/2015 20:59

Thanks for your insights disquisitions. Very useful to hear from the other side of the table, as it were.
I don't think it has occurred to DD that she might have been slow and laborious.It is probably not wise for me to plant that seed of doubt! Best thing is to forget about it for a month.The worst case scenario is Warwick or Durham, both of which are excellent alternatives!

disquisitiones · 09/12/2015 21:17

From what you describe there's no reason at all to think your DD didn't do well, and it's good that she feels confident waiting for the results.

BTW Warwick and Durham are not really comparable for maths (Warwick being much better, Durham has done rather poorly in recent assessments for maths research and takes weaker maths students) but of course liking the university is also important. All of the top 10/20 UK maths courses are good.

Rezolution123 · 09/12/2015 21:33

Oh dear! DD very down-hearted tonight after her first interview today.
I don't know how to comfort her. I know that sounds silly but she is really kicking herself for leaving out things she wanted to say which were very relevant.
Second interview tomorrow and she says she wants to leave as soon as it is over and put the whole experience behind her. Maybe Oxford is not for her. Pity because she had built it up into something wonderful and it has not measured up to her expectations.
That's life, I guess.

kalidasa · 09/12/2015 21:40

I have interviewed candidates for both ox and cam and in two different subjects. The only times I have given someone a really easy run was when it was clear that they weren't going to get in. So on the whole feeling that the interviewers kept on pushing is a good sign - you don't keep pushing if you think there's nowhere else to go!

Personally I think the whole interviewing thing is overrated and they should probably ditch it in most cases. But that's a whole other thread . . .

Good luck to everyone going through this this week. I did it myself once and still remember being asked to define an elephant.

bevelino · 09/12/2015 21:43

My dd had a first interview at Oxford today and said she answered all the questions but has no idea how well she has done. She has a second interview at the same college tomorrow.

My dd is not too worried thankfully and says what will be, will be.

HocusCrocus · 09/12/2015 23:35

Horseman - a friend of Ds got an offer from a college which was not his first choice. He is so happy there now. Do ask if it becomes relevant.

HocusCrocus · 10/12/2015 01:12

Horsemad I mean of course. The computer took over with its overbearing spelling opinions.

Molio · 10/12/2015 08:03

It's not really pure speculation horsemad because the likelihood is that if an offer is forthcoming it will be from the second college, since more people are pooled than are sent out for standardization. Is it one of the 'less popular' colleges and is that the problem, or is it because she knows people there that she doesn't get on with, and thinks that might prove a problem?

Molio · 10/12/2015 08:10

Rezolution if you can catch her before her interview maybe tell her that she really doesn't need to be great in each interview. A good second interview can very definitely (in my DCs' experience) trump the first. DD1 was told subsequently by her tutor that most of what she said was meh but one part of one interview was really interesting, and they decided as soon as she left the room that that was enough. One DS had a very, very meh first interview but a good second one and a better third. Cheer her up if you possibly can! It's far from over yet!

Rezolution123 · 10/12/2015 08:35

Thanks for that Molio I have spoken to her this morning and she was just about OK. Promised to take her out for a treat when she gets back - food shopping for Xmas which she loves!
I will try to speak again after breakfast and before her interview. I think she actually prefers this second college to be honest. A friend from back home is up for an interview and in the accommodation there so she has see that the facilities are better.
Thanks again for your support. I did not realise how stressful the whole process would be.

horsemadmom · 10/12/2015 08:46

Hi Molio- Both. It's a smaller, uglier version of her school and a girl who has made her life pretty hellish will probably come up in the same year. Plus she found the interviewing tutor unimpressive. Like they were selling HER on the college.
Does anyone know if they pool in groups? Might be good info if she reapplies next year.

Themodernuriahheep · 10/12/2015 19:56

Great question this year,

Imagine if you had an animal that was a mixture of chimp and human. How would you control it?

alreadytaken · 10/12/2015 21:03

students going for interview should expect to discuss unseen material, to be taken beyond the information they have studied (mine was asked have you studied......yet and when they said no, asked questions in that area). They should be told that many current students have made at least one stupid mistake in the interview, even if they only realise it much later. My child realised later, when they did study that topic, that the interviewer wasn't entirely correct either. Students can be reminded, if they think it went badly, that other applicants aren't perfect either.

I'd agree that placing a lot of weight on interviews is stupid. It allows you to separate the brilliant from the terrible but it's not reliable for sorting out the others. It doesnt identify those who can cope with the pressure of the short terms.

My child is now in their third year and some of their friends are feeling that pressure. If your child doesnt get a place remind them of the advantages of longer terms.

horsemadmom the other girl may not get a place or she may mature and be less obnoxious at university, the interviewing tutor may never be seen again unless the college is very small.

Rezolution123 · 10/12/2015 22:09

Molio Thank you for your advice. DD said that my phone call this am did help her be more upbeat about second interview, which went quite well.
She is home tonight, absolutely shattered but has gained from the experience, I think.