Just been told that dd1's problem might be because she might be "super" intelligent. Why does this not feel good?

[Wills]

You'd think we'd feel proud but unfortunately at the moment it feels more like a bloody curse! We've been having problems with dd1 and her school for the last 9 months (i.e. ever since she started at this junior school). Its been awful! Every week has been a new complaint from boredom to can't do it, to her friends not playing with her. Finally I started to think she was being bullied. Unfortunately I didn't seriously intervenne in time and she spent a whole week of sick in pure fear of going in to school. I've been into the school loads and loads and with some very helpful mums on here wrote a fab complaint letter to the head etc. The school feel that she's a very average student and that is a little too delicate. I'm furious that my child that would once eat books and live in imagination now resents books because she's teased about them, is desperate to fit in and has been put on anti depressants. To support me my dm offered to pay for a couple of sessions with a child psychologist. We've been to the first session and his conclusion is that all of our issues have the classic hall marks of a bright child being seriously frustrated at school. Its all very well for him to deliver this conclusion but what now. In his opinion he doesn't feel that she will suit LEA schools at all and that she needs far more individualised teaching with higher teacher ratios. He's suggested we hunt out a Montessori school and send there. Well that's ok then isn't it. But number 1 we've no money for private schooling and number 2 even should we suddenly win the lottery there's no primary level montessori in the county in which we live.

I do feel we need to move her from this school as they have let her down terribly regardless of whether she's "gifted" or not. But I just don't know where to. How will I know that the same troubles wont start all over again?

Would love some help/guidance

You mentioned that you'd have to appeal to get her a place at another school. That may be right, but you could go that route in your case. What you could do is to see if you can get an EP to make a statement that she has special educational needs (SEN) - which she does - and find a good small primary with good OFSTED in your local area with a better student/teacher ratio. Then apply to move your DD into the school.

As she has a SEN, she would then be moved to the top of the heap as regards applicants for places. Check through the application criteria on your Council website as I know this is the case in most schools local to me, and many other councils across the country. Particularly in high-performing church schools, where SEN takes priority even over church attendance and proximity to the school! (the other main criteria for admission).

Of course visit the schools to see what their policies are re gifted kids, but I think you might find that even the smaller ratios would work in her favour.

I had a similar experience to your DD in school (many years ago) and it was never resolved - in those days parent power wasn't what it is now, and kids weren't so aware they had a voice. I regret that every day. So I really hope that you get this resolved for your DD's happiness, as well as her schooling.