School dont know how to handle her brain power and neither do I.

[rosie1977]

When my DD was on placed on the Gifted and Talented list at Primary School i didnt think anything about it just knew i was oh so proud.
Yesterday i went to meet with my daughters teacher as part of an informal chat about her first 3 months in Jrs. Apparently they have never dealt with a child as focused or as intelligent as my daughter. Her reading is well about 12-13 year olds but school have told me they want to slow her down because after she has read all their books they really wont know what to do with her.
They want to make sure she understands the content of what she is reading but asking her questions on characters, settinsg etc and i will definately do my bit at home. Have agreed with school that the books i buy I will read first and then ask her detailed questions after.

I really have no idea tho how to really help her. How do i ensure that her educational needs are being met? How can I make sure that what i am doing is good enough?

Her thirst for learning is incredible, she actually asks her teachers if she can do extra research at home, her homework is completed within a few minutes and never really causes her an issue. she has even used a word in a sentence before that i had to google to check it was a real word and to make sure it was used appropriately and it was.

So please any advice anyone has i will be grateful. Hopefully all the above makes sense its almost 4am and since yesterdays meeting I have been troubled.

How old is she?

It's great that she is enjoying her school work and loves to read. I think the teachers are right - reading is one thing but comprehension is another completely. I expect she could read all sorts of wonderful texts but not really understand what they were about, so don't fret about there being nothing left for her to learn.

I think in your position I would look at other areas of her life. How is she doing socially? Does she like music? How about sport? Or maths or languages? Perhaps she could join a club or take up an instrument?

The impression I get from your OP is that you are worried that she will run out of things to learn. That simply isn't going to happen. Stephen Hawking hasn't run out of things to learn yet.

I am not even convinced by the school's 'panic' that she will read them dry - there are more books written than she could read in a lifetime.

Be proud of her. Encourage her in the things she enjoys. Be calm about it. And be equally relaxed about the things she struggles with.

Also, doing the practical side of the reading - eg doing some science experiments, nature walks to identify animals and plants, that kind of thing would be a good way to help take what is in the books and make them 'real'. Libraries will have lots of books on simple chemistry experiments you can do with basic kitchen ingredients and tools.

Another area that would be a very different challenge is a new language, if that is an option.

My DD is 7 turns 8 February, and yes she understands what she is reading, sometimes in too much of a hurry to get the next book read to fully empathise with the content of whats being read. Socially she is doing fantastic she has a great circle of friends both male and female.
She cant do sports because she has a bad condition thats being investigated her coordination is, she does recorders at school which she loves even if in my opinion she still sounds like a squeaky mouse.
French she is doing above and beyond at she just seemed to connect with the language so after xmas we are going to buy her Muzzy as she has a really keen interest in other languages.
Maths she is well above average too but not as advanced as her reading and writing.

I have just found a list from The Telegragh on the 100 books all children should read and i will probably start buying those. I bought her 40 books at Easter and she had read them all within 3 weeks.

With her being only 7 we are trying to make sure what she reads is appropriate for her.

Oh and I am very proud of her. Due to an emotional trauma when she was young she didnt go to nursery and missed half of her reception education. I guess she has more than caught up lol.

Some days i dont see my daughter except at meal times. She goes to school and some days goes straight upstairs to read, she will happily sit with her encyclopedia.
Her empathy of other people is above and beyond anything i have ever seen in a child of her age...in fact is more than i see in many adults too.

Many thanks :)

Amazing.

Hi rosie. My dd was and is like yours, although she is now 12 and she goes off with her history and maths books! I was told the same sort of thing about the books - ask dd what the story was about, identify each character and sometimes ask her what she thought might happen next. Be careful she doesn't get left behind like my dd did a little bit (as i have posted before) and she may end up having to help other children instead of school giving her extra work or more challenging stuff. I was always told "look on the internet" for extra stuff! School was bone idle and i think they like the children all around the same ability.

Yeah school seemed quite baffled by her and the teacher admitted my DD scares her because she doesnt know how to teach a child of her abilities.
After Xmas i am going to ask for a meeting with her teacher and headteacher and see how we can challenge her in positive ways so she does get the best thing for her.
Her teacher was very sweet about it and said she wanted to make sure that the things Megan reads are overly sexual or about things a 7/8 year old doesnt need to be reading. The teacher wants to make sure my DD doesnt become a brat with knowing how clever she is which is something we have both witnessed, and we obviously want to avoid bullying.
I think its important she stays in her year group and interacts with people her own age group.
School and i have decided the best way to help her is to work together and I am more than willing to do so.

There are lots of great books to read it should be fiine.

Does she get the chance to perform plays/make speeches. Reading to an audience along with comprehension are very important.

40 books in 3 weeks ? And I thought I was a bookworm!

Ds is like this, I don't worry about it now and just go with the flow. I do recommend that you research books for their content before you give them to her though, I've made a few errors. There was a reading thing at primary school, 1 point per page. He smashed through 50k in 3 years. The local library is a good place to head, the librarians are very helpful and will suggest books you've not heard of. Don't forget about the non-fiction books also. It's great that your dd is at a school where they are trying to support her, a lot of children don't have this. Does she play any instruments? This could help to keep her occupied.

Can I second some of the things hughB and other have said above?

If it is possible to step away from the book learning a little and get your DD involved in music / sport / drama or anything else that takes your fancy then please do.

I think it is vitally important for children who are very, very good at the work they need to do in school to do some other stuff too.

It is great that your DD is doing so well, and enjoying her work so much, but if she's going to be as happy and well rounded as possible she's going to need interests outside of the academic field.

Learning that you can have fun and contribute usefully to something without being the best (or even anywhere near it) is a MASSIVELY useful life lesson. Your DD will discover other strengths and weaknesses in her abilities and get a fuller picture of how she stands in relation to the abilities and interests of others which will stand her in good stead.

If you don't experience that, it can be a dreadful shock when you finally reach the edges of the bubble of school / university / select professional group and hit your own limits.

I'd look at reviews of muzzy before buying tbh mumsnet advanced search is your friend here. Much better to invest in a few french lessons.

I agree with the others who are saying 'look to other activities'. It sounds like she has a mind that needs to be kept busy and you can redirect that to other things than reading.

Are you a member of your local library?

You'll save yourself a fortune and still get plenty of age appropriate fiction and non fiction books. Our library orders in books that i've found online and want to try before I buy. So, we get lots of brand new books.

Some excellent comprehension checking resources are out there - ideas of how to discuss things, draw and make things, write a play, explore issues and have fun based on one book. It's a shame if a high quality book is read and then forgotten when it can be used in so many ways.

Another one not very impressed with Muzzy (Spanish, but it may be the best of a bad lot, that part I can't say).

How can I make sure that what i am doing is good enough?

It sounds like you are already doing plenty, tbh. I don't see that you have any problems to solve. Just keep an eye on suitable reading materials.

Suggestions - go and see plays. Maybe she can write little plays of her own? Can she join a Drama class?
There are lots of poetry/short story writing competitions out there. Can you encourage her to enter some?
I appreciate she can't do PE but can she do swimming lessons/more music lessons etc? Can she learn an instrument through your county music service? Can she learn another language through schools or through secondary schools ASTs if there is any availability in your area?
Keep her busy and encourage.
Good luck.

rosie - I will be absolutley frank. This is not good.

DS1 was/is like this and what happened was the teachers at his Prep just left him to his own devices in the end and focussed on getting the other children up to speed with their SATs. They didnt say it but in their eyes there was no point in teaching DS1 any more as he had already reached the required grade.

We had no idea of what was going on until he told us he was sat looking out of the window in maths as the work was so far below him he finished in 5 mins. Many meetings later the teachers finally gave him more to do but it still was not enough. They were holding him back so he didnt get too far ahead. He lost motivation and was bored. In one famous case he solved a maths question that neither his teacher of Head could do. He started writing poetry on his own and a little newspaper at home. In the end we started topping up his maths homework at home with work from a book 2 years ahead of his age. Like your DD he was devouring books so we paid attention to that and made sure he always had something to challenge and interest him on his bookshelf.

Don't let this lie unresolved. Your DD needs and deserves more. It sounds like the school are almost blaming her for being too far ahead and trying to downplay her work. We had that too where a single silly mistake on a whole page full of maths questions was jumped on as evidence he wasnt really that bright.

That used to happen to ds a lot Beta, the teachers wouldn't give him anything harder until his presentation improved.

Going to play devil's advocate here and suggest that actually you are in a good position with the school. Firstly you are all in agreement about you DD having unique needs, the school have not suggested they have all the answers and you seem to share a caring relationship with the teacher about the needs of your daughter. The fact they want to slow her down on the reading is not the same as holding her back and you DDs teacher seems quite proactive in looking for individual, appropriate reading material for her. I think they are simply wanting to try to get the maximum benefit and use from each book in terms of skills developed, rather than her galloping through one, finishing it and heading straight off to the next book. Schools do not have an infinite amount of reading resources after all; they can only do the best with what they have and it sounds like your teacher is doing her best and is sensitive to what is appropriate for your DD.

The fact that the teacher says she is somewhat scared or apprehensive about teaching your daughter should not be viewed as a negative. I think hats off to the teacher for having the professional confidence to admit she doesn't yet have all the answers about what your DDs ability is or how to teach her. Few teachers would automatically know this as children of you DDs ability are rarely met in the classroom. Personally I see many, many, many very bright children and children who are good test takers and skilled at doing well in school. I doubt I have ever taught a child of you DDs ability either and I wouldn't necessarily know how to start either! But I would be willing to learn and it sounds like DDs teacher is too. It is concerning for teachers when they see children who self-isolate to focus on books etc. We do like to see them socialise and run around with friends and though many children are perfectly happy in their own little book world there needs to be a balance so the fact that they want to work with you to ensure she is happy with peers, not suffering bullying etc. is all great.

Sounds to me like you have a lovely, open relationship with the school which can only keep getting better as you all seem on the same page about helping DD. Good luck with it all.

On language learning you may like to check out Rosetta Stone, which I have heard good recommendations about (compared to muzzy).

here is a helpful list of skills suggested for each sublevel of reading. there aer a lot of skills to think about. practising some of these with each book may be helpful. does she write as well as she reads? perhaps writing about the books would help. we are supposed to do book reports for each book read. (given up this week due to illness)

have you asked the teacher what skills she needs to work on?

I would agree with the advice not to sweat it too much.

DS is in a similar position, when they tested his reading at 5 he too had a reading age of about 13. Now at 8 he was sitting doing simultaneous equations with his grandad at the weekend from an A level maths text book for fun, so I do know where you are coming from.

I used to get tied in knots about whether the school were meeting his needs or not until I asked myself what I thought those needs actually were and where I wanted ds to end up. I do not want him to do GCSEs at 10 or to be accelerated through school and go to uni early. I do not know a single adult for whom this has resulted in a happy outcome.

Above all, I want him to be happy and fit in with his peers as I think this will generate the most successful and fulfilled adult. What this has meant for us is backing off with the school and simply making sure he is happy there. At home he is encouraged to do whatever he wants to, including things like music and sport, both of which he is not very good at and consequently levels the playing field with him and his sister and makes him understand what it is to struggle with things.

I don't really have too much advice for you, except not to over think things and stress too much.

muzzy is a bit rubbish tbh.all of mine loved la jolie ronde for french though?

rosie, dd2 was assessed at the same level (for lit and comprehension) in yr r, and tbh i just let her/ them get on with it (we move schools a lot anyway). i make sure she has plenty of access to different books and as she's so little, she doesn't have access to more mature content anyway.
she runs a story writing club (there are a few writers and a few illustrators) at lunchtime. and at her last school they claimed to be moving her around to different year groups for project work...
i should also add she has cerebral palsy and is desperately crap at pe etc as a result so they sound quite similar. at the moment she still wants to join in pe at school but in all honesty it's a bit of a nightmare - they keep asking if she would rather do some 1-1 but she says 'i want to participate with everyone else'. i suspect (she's just 8 now) that this will wane over the next year as she realises it marks her out as more different, not less so.

for the rest of it, we are waiting until middle school - i know they have a reasonable programme for more able children (dd1 is on it) with mentors etc, but at the mo dd2 is only 8, and she's happy whatever she's up to. her current craze is song writing. she asked to learn the guitar two years ago, but the combination of being 6 and having cp meant that it wasn't anywhere near viable. she has a keyboard. (she does have a guitar but is sort of teaching herself - i'm not paying for lessons yet)

oh and swimming lessons (she swims like a brick) and brownies. i think it's really important that she gets on with normal 8yo stuff.

Many thanks for all the wonderful responses I will most certainly be looking at every suggestion.
Atm I do feel overwhelmed and I know school are going to do all the can they are setting up a book group for and hope to get her some 1 on 1 to help discuss the books and such which will also take some pressure off me because my youngest son has some learning issues.
She does swimming with the school but we will be looking into Brownies and outside groups.
My daughter has so much determination, she has a really nasty cough and hasnt been feeling her best but she goes to school every day fearful of missing something. She hides feeling ill just so she can go to school and wont tell anyone whilst at school.
She asked me how she got 110% attendence at school and i looked at her like she had gone mad.
I am going to be quite slow in my research because I feel i need to slow down and take stock, am going to make another appointment with school after xmas just to sit and really discuss everything in detail.
Who would of thought a gifted child could cause so much stress lol. I have always fully supported whichever school she is at because i feel thats the best way to get the best support for my child. So far its worked.

Rosie, you sound really sensible in how you are approaching this. I have not much more to add to others advice except to say I think we probably all understand the sense of shock that can come with having a child who has some exceptional abilities. For my ds it is maths but it ws really only into Y2 that we realised quite how exceptional he was rather than just working a few years ahead of himself. It takes quite a bit of getting used to! I have learned to relax a bit, go with him up to a point, and above all try and support him to have a balanced life, which means normal activities rather than more more and more maths (which he might well do if not diverted!)

Good luck.