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Gifted and talented

Talk to other parents about parenting a gifted child on this forum.

Original poster

Is this unusual in a 20 month old?

64 replies

Ophuchi · 11/11/2011 10:35

My friend's son is 20 months old and recently she has had concerns about his speech development as he only has 4 words - mum, dad, dog and bab (meaning his sister.) He does understand what is said to him and can point out things when asked.

She had him assessed and as it turns out, he has the cognitive ability of a 3 year old. He is very quick with puzzles.

Is this unusual in a 20 month old? Could he be gifted in maths?

OP posts:
triballeader · 11/11/2011 15:26

It would depend very much upon the puzzles. The ones HV use simply test if a child is hitting normal developmental targets. Some things they hit early some things late. Its a love of maths and abilty to think creatively that makes the big difference.

In my sons case it was his critical and abstract thinking that made him as relaxing as a crack addicted crocodile to live with - 13 years on it has not got any easier either but his school does all they can as he left me some way behind years ago.

Its far better to let little kids be kids and let them play and enjoy what they are good at and give support and encouragement where they struggle. A happy child who feels loved as they are with a normal range of ability tends to do better than an unhappy child who drives themsleves at the upper end of the bellcurve.

Colleger · 11/11/2011 20:04

It is possible that he may be gifted at maths. My son was doing 200 piece jigsaws for 8-10 year olds when he was 18 months so it is possible.

MrTumblesBum · 11/11/2011 20:10

My DD1 was crafting handmade puzzles from tree bark and writing hieroglyphics at 8mo.

HTH.

Original poster
Ophuchi · 11/11/2011 20:27

Wow MrTumblesBum - that's amazing! ;)

I think my friend just really wants for her son to excel at something. One of her other friends (whom I recall as being the ghastly one from our ante-natal classes) has spawned uberbaby, who does everything so much better than everyone else's child (although no-one has ever seen evidence of this!)

I think ghastly mum has knocked my friend's confidence. I have told her not to mind the horrible mum and that I think her DS is a very smart little boy who'll speak when he's ready and in a few months when he never shuts up she'll be wondering what she worried about :) Thanks for your replies.

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MrTumblesBum · 11/11/2011 20:29

These children are 20mo.

They will excel at their own thing in their own time.

It's not a competition.

Original poster
Ophuchi · 11/11/2011 20:33

Yes, I know that :) Just need to talk some sense into my friend!

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MrTumblesBum · 11/11/2011 20:45

Funny that she's worried considering she already has an older child - I don't really think about what my second can or can't do, I think you get more relaxed about this stuff when you've had more than one. Maybe she had a good talker first time round and that's fueling her concerns with her DS? I bet it all evens out soon.

Thinking back to my DD1 and her friends at 20mo they were all pretty average, doing the same kind of thing as your DD - letters, numbers, shapes etc etc. Nothing exceptional, I think one was good with puzzles but more like 10 piece puzzles rather than 200 piece puzzles!

Original poster
Ophuchi · 11/11/2011 21:00

Yes, that's a good point. Her DD was much like mine (and a lot of other kids) at the same age and is now doing exceptionally well in school. She maybe equates quick progress as a toddler with school success later. I don't think it quite works like that though!

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Original poster
Ophuchi · 11/11/2011 21:15

Also her older child is 17 so maybe if there's a big gap between kids then it feels like pfb all over again, I don't know. Her DD has done really well all through school, all A's in her exams.

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MrTumblesBum · 11/11/2011 21:20

Ah yes, it could be the gage gap. I also think it's more usual for boys to be slightly slower with speech than girls but it doesn't mean the cogs aren't whirring.

Def know of a couple of boys who didn't speak much til later but had a lot of other stuff going on that was less obvious and these boys were stronger in other areas than the girls who could talk really well and name colours and letters etc etc.

Original poster
Ophuchi · 11/11/2011 21:29

I think you're right about the differences in gender. Seems to fit with the profile of all the toddlers we know. The girls generally are the chatterboxes! Good practice for later on in life :)

I don't think she has anything to worry about. DS will probably go on to do every bit as well as his sister, because his mum and dad really care about his education.

OP posts:
HauntyMython · 11/11/2011 21:29

Lots of boys are good with puzzles and slow with speech,

Yep like my 2.2yo DS, he sounds like a baby half the time, he's having some speech therapy (informal group sessions) but stick him in front of wooden train tracks, bricks or puzzles and you'd think he's some kind of genius.

He isn't, he's just normal, different children develop in different ways, that's all.

I hear about HVs declaring children to be gifted quite a lot (not just on MN) but it's worth remembering that's not actually their area of expertise. Besides, the child is far too young to make any assessment like that.

Original poster
Ophuchi · 11/11/2011 21:34

Yes, it'd be very dull if you knew what to expect next because that's what the textbook says!

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mrsshears · 11/11/2011 21:43

my hv was one of the first people to say that dd2 was gifted,she was older than 20mths though.
she was right Smile.

Original poster
Ophuchi · 11/11/2011 21:54

How old was DD2 Mrsshears, just out of interest?

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NotnOtter · 11/11/2011 21:55

aaaaargghhhhhhh!

sits on hates. Placates herself with the knowledge that time will resolve all this 'gifted' CRAP thats talked about kids

NotnOtter · 11/11/2011 21:56

weird freudian slip!

sits on hands - well tries to....

mrsshears · 11/11/2011 22:03

It was always commented on that she was very bright but the G word wasnt mentioned until she had the schedule of growing skills done at her 3yr check.
dd2 is now 5 and We have just had this confirmed by a private assesment (we reached this decision after many issues at school).

Original poster
Ophuchi · 11/11/2011 22:14

That's good to know. My mil, who worked in primary education for many years, thinks that my DD may be gifted as she's already reading among other things. I'm sure the health visitor will advise us at her 3 year check. I don't think early reading is a sure sign of giftedness though, and it'll likely be the case that she's an early developer and not gifted.

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Happygochuckie · 11/11/2011 22:14

I hope your friendisn't too worried, the little one will catch up in the next year, most likely OP, I've mentioned on here before, but I have two nephews, brothers, one was saying "woof woof", "car", "mum", "oh look", "uh oh", "Some?" at 8 months, I kid you not, and by rising 2, talking fluently. The other, said absolutely nothing, just looked at you smiling cutely, and pointing. Not a word, until one day, aged 2yrs and 7 mths, he came out with "Where Corey gone?" and that was it, he was off, learning to talk, phrase by phrase, sentence by sentence. By the time he started playgroup at three months later, he was talking fluently, pretty much. Now they are 41/2 and 6, both bright and working at levels above their expected age levels. (And the other day, the four year old, who was late to talk, said "inconsiderately" in exactly the right context.)

Original poster
Ophuchi · 11/11/2011 22:16

That's great to know, happygochuckie. What they do as toddlers has little to do with anything else :)

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mrsshears · 11/11/2011 22:19

ophuchi dd was a very early reader too,memory reading from 2yrs old and properly blending and segmenting from 3.
Early reading seems to appear on lots of the characteristics of gifted children lists but at the same time as others have said it can also be a child who simply has an early interest in books.

Original poster
Ophuchi · 11/11/2011 22:21

Yes, my little one really loves stories. I think that's all it is to be honest.

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ChocolateBiscuitCake · 11/11/2011 22:30

Well to be honest, if your dd (and your friends ds) were gifted, I think the midwife should really have said something at birth...Wink

exoticfruits · 11/11/2011 22:30

Just enjoy the stage they are at.