I've been MIA for a bit due to losing the thread but I hadn't forgotten it!
@KentishMama I'm sorry you're here but I welcome you to the thread. I'm very new here too.
I got my treatment plan yesterday and frankly, it's as good as it could possibly be given that I have bowel cancer. I didn't take a lot of the technical details in (eg the precise staging), I figured I could always ask about them later. But basically: I'll be operated on fairly soon (probably within two weeks). I have bog standard bowel cancer with no mets, which is fantastic news really. At this stage they don't think chemo will be needed but this will be determined after lymph node biopsy. If I do need chemotherapy that will be for three months.
The surgery is not going to be fun and there is an 8 to 9% chance of complications but I've just got to get on with it really. I'm trying to take it as it comes. All going well I will end up cancer-free after 5 years.
@Lubballoo a week ago I spent a rather tense five days or so waiting to hear the results of my scan and whether there was metastasis. Fortunately in my case there was not. I think I coped reasonably well (under the circumstances that is) but this is what helped me --> YMMV and feel free to ignore!
*I worked - I had a few small jobs to do and it gave me something to focus on for a while.
*I worried (despite the above) and accepted that it was ok to worry. I had said to my friend, "I'm really stressed," and she just said to me, "That's ok. That's normal."
*I talked to a lot of people. The day after diagnosis but before having the scan, I woke up and thought HELP! I texted my friend and we arranged for me to bring my kids over. The kids played together (kids aren't required to socially distance here) while my friend and her husband took turns chatting with me about the diagnosis, about the weather, about whatever. It was great to have some company.
ExH and I also talked at length about the pros and cons, repeating over and over that we just had to take it one day at a time!
*My GP rang me and we talked for a bit about things. It was really good to talk to someone who wasn't emotionally involved - obviously she cares, but I didn't need to worry about her feelings, the focus was completely on me.
*I found an online forum for bowel cancer and saw how people were coping with the 'worst-case scenario' and still enjoying life.
I really just took it hour by hour (and even now I'm taking it day by day, not looking too far ahead into the future).
My colonoscopy was delayed due to lockdown and I was so worried about metastatis. Every little twinge, I thought jeez, could that be cancer? As it turned out, none of it was, so it's clear that sometimes a sore hip really is just from getting older and that persistent cough really can be late-diagnosed asthma! It didn't stop me worrying about lung cancer though, jeez!
I don't know how helpful this is, but I also have two children in primary school and I know the fear.
One other thing that helped me when I started to worry was repeating an affirmation. I have a Louise Hay book of affirmations and every time I caught myself getting into a scary thought spiral I said to myself, "I love and accept myself" and a few other things. It helped me to refocus my thoughts. I'm happy to look it up for you if you like, or you could just as easily make something up for yourself or say your children's names or "I have to pay the phone bill" or whatever works for you!
I was a bit cross with the tumour too and told it that it had to go away, it's got no right to be there, it's not wanted there. I suppose it gives me a focus for the feelings!
I've just outed myself as completely batshit but that's how I managed. Thinking of you 
.