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Brexit
Original poster

What have I done to deserve this?

67 replies

bestcatintheworld · 28/06/2016 20:26

Over 20 years I've lived in this country. I never meant to stay longer than two years, but fell in love, got married, had children, stayed here because it was easier for my husband. No economic pressure to come or stay here, strictly for experience as a young person, to work, study and improve my language skills. Worked all the time here, never claimed benefits, paid taxes, got a STEM PhD and am now in a highly skilled job. Now I have to worry about work, breaking up my family, jeopardising my whole existence. Worst of all, I am beginning to feel really unwelcome. I just can't get over this - I never considered myself as a migrant, just an EU citizen settling down, getting on with life. Never felt like a foreigner, loved this country for its open mind and tolerant attitude.
I am finding this all very hard to comprehend.Middle-aged now, and truly screwed. No idea what will happen to me.

OP posts:
TulipsInAJug · 29/06/2016 16:53

I voted Leave, but that certainly doesn't mean I wanted to send EU residents in the UK 'back home'.

People voted Leave for various reasons - it's far too simplistic to imply that anyone who voted out wants to send immigrants home. Rubbish. Those who are here should of course remain. David Cameron said as much yesterday in parliament.

Original poster
bestcatintheworld · 29/06/2016 17:15

I'm sure I have some human right to stay with my husband and children, but at what price? What rights will I lose, which hoops wil I have to jump through? It's a very agonising time.

OP posts:
TheElementsSong · 29/06/2016 17:17

I voted Leave, but that certainly doesn't mean I wanted to send EU residents in the UK 'back home'.

Would it be OK, please Tulips, if we please don't rehash the discussion here about how Leave voters aren't racists and have all sorts of brilliant reasons for their vote and are feeling terribly wounded by these hurtful allegations? And a bit less of the snappy dismissal of fears would also be kind.

Several posters here are talking about how fucking sad and unwelcome they feel in the country they called home. Families are distraught, people fear for their jobs and homes. This is how some, probably many, immigrants now feel. That you personally didn't mean it is lovely, thanks Cake. But for goodness sake stop pretending so you can feel good about yourself, that there weren't enough Leave voters who voted to "get them out" that have brought about these feelings.

unlucky83 · 29/06/2016 17:50

best with respect - I think you are being a bit overly dramatic. You really do need to calm down. As others have said your human rights (which have not been taken away) will have an influence on being able to stay. Bear in mind we can't get rid of some nasty criminals because of human rights. If you have paid into a pension and into the UK system I am sure you will be able to retire here and get treated on the NHS as a resident. Yes you may to apply - but it would affect many people I am pretty sure it will be a pretty simple process.
But do feel free to carry on if it makes you feel better....
I said I voted leave - for bigger, more important reasons than purely personal interest. I actually did in the interest of the UK and also for the EU -hopefully it will get the shake up it really needs. And I did that with an EU citizen DP (who couldn't vote) and actually in Scotland with the knowledge that it may well trigger another independence referendum - when the last one was a hideous time for me personally...that's how important I thought it was.

Original poster
bestcatintheworld · 29/06/2016 18:23

unlucky over dramatic I am not. I'm in a shit place, sorry. You can speculate what will or will not happen to me, but it's just that - speculation. I've heard often enough that "I will be ok". I'm not ok. On the day the result came through I was asked at work if I'm packing my bags now. Listen to the shit about hate crimes. So there we go. Definitely not ok, and not calming down any time soon.

OP posts:
WhoWants2Know · 29/06/2016 18:41

Yeah, it's easy enough to patronise people who are hurting from a secure position. I'm an immigrant (not EU) with secure status, and I'm weighing up whether to leave. It doesn't matter that the hate crimes are happening to "other" immigrants- it still hurts me. And it makes me wonder if this the country that I want give the best years of my working life. Why stay where you're not wanted.

Fawful · 29/06/2016 18:47

The other thing being, unlucky, that David Cameron is not the one who is going to get to decide what happens to us. As things stand, no matter what we have contributed, we haven't acquired any automatic right to anything here. We are at the mercy of the next politicians in power, who have been going around today saying how committed they are to deliver what the 17.5m voters have apparently wanted. So I don't think we are silly to be worrying a bit.

unlucky83 · 29/06/2016 18:51

Are still working in academia? I also have a Phd in a STEM subject and in our labs it was a very diverse group of people - really surprised if someone there asked you about packing your bags unless it was a joke...or came from an ill educated remainer being overly dramatic...
DP - is an EU citizen - actually non-white as well and so far he hasn't experienced any hate crime ....or been told to go home...like I said it is a tiny amount and it will die down quickly (even quicker if the tabloids and remainers stop stirring)
I obviously can't say anything to calm you down - I wonder how you will feel in a years time?
The only thing I would say is I hope you are being careful to hide this hysteria from your DCs as it really wouldn't be fair to make them worry over this...

Original poster
bestcatintheworld · 29/06/2016 18:52

fawful and who, thank you

OP posts:
Original poster
bestcatintheworld · 29/06/2016 18:55

One thing I also wonder is how long will it take to process 1.8 million residency applications?

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Fawful · 29/06/2016 19:01

Yes! The waiting time was 'up to 5 months' before the referendum according to immigration boards.

unlucky83 · 29/06/2016 19:03

I am not coming from a secure position! DP is my partner of 20+yrs , we have DCs together, own property etc...so it could cause me grief - and would I be allowed to move to his country? What about the DCs who currently have British passports etc? - I guess the first thing I could do is swallow my feminist principles and marry him...but at the end of the day it can all be dealt with...
As I said if you do need to eg apply for residency there will be a lot of other people in the same situation - so they will have to simplify and support the application procedure or they will struggle to process them...
But I really am giving up now...

Original poster
bestcatintheworld · 29/06/2016 19:11

I cannot for the life of me fathom why someone in your position has voted leave, but I am not challenging you for an answer

OP posts:
Fawful · 29/06/2016 19:17

It doesn't look like moving to your DP's country was ever a big plan of yours, unlucky, so it's not quite comparable to our situations. Our DCs only speak English for instance.

user1466690252 · 29/06/2016 19:21

www.facebook.com/Nohatehere-539596489498806/

OP have a look at this. Maybe it will help you

Original poster
bestcatintheworld · 29/06/2016 19:24

It's nice to see that people make a stand against xenophobia, user

OP posts:
user1466690252 · 29/06/2016 19:44

I honestly beleive that on the whole, people are good. We just want to make sure those voices shout louder at the moment

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