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Original poster

Ignorant quetion, and not sure how to put this tactfully, but why do people not want to have a baby with DS?

4 replies

LesAnimaux · 10/04/2011 20:59

I don't want to offend, or be flamed, but I am curious.

I've seen several threads where posters have terminated a pregnancy when they have found out their baby has Down Syndrome, and then gone on to ttc a "normal" baby.

Now, I don't personally know any one with DS or any parents of children with DS, so I genuinely don't know the difficulties they face. Is life with downs syndrome really so bad? Or is it the thought of a child growing into an adult with SN and having no one to care for them when the parents are no longer capable?

Out of all the things I worried about when pregnant, downs syndrome wasn't one of them.

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MNHQ

JustineMumsnet · 13/04/2011 15:01

Hi all,
I'm really sorry folks have been upset by our decision to move this thread to this topic yesterday. When we set up this topic it was for the precise reason to house this kind of discussion around choices to do with testing in pregnancy. At the time it was felt it would be better to have one place where such discussion could occur, so that those who wanted to, could easily hide the topic.

We do understand that these issues are extremely emotive and potentially upsetting but we do also think that MN ought to be a place where people can discuss difficult subjects. If you disagree or think we should review this please do let us know and we promise to give it some more thought.

We know that there have been some issues around being logged out which means that hidden threads aren't always staying hidden and we looking into that as a matter of urgency.

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MNHQ

MNHQ

RebeccaMumsnet · 13/04/2011 16:18

@ghislaine

I wanted to add that the fact that this thread features in "Discussions of the Day" only adds to my impression that this is seen as some sort of abstract topic we can all have a consequence-free chat about not an intensely personal and distressing experience.

Hi ghislaine
Thank you for your comments we will take them on board.
We just wanted to clarify that this thread has never been a 'discussion of the day'. We do read your feedback so please do continue to add to this thread.

Best
MNHQ

MNHQ

JustineMumsnet · 13/04/2011 16:48

@ghislaine

Yes, MyAngelAva, that is exactly right. I guess it has been made very clear to us that the feelings of women who terminate for abnormalities really don't count.

Justine, are you and others at Mumsnet HQ really not able to see how inappropriate this is? This is not the place for such a "discussion" as you term it. Whatever the original intention of this section it has clearly evolved away from that.

If perhaps I started a thread asking whether you would be able to turn off the life support of a fatally injured loved one, would you move it to Bereavement so that others who had been through that decision could give their opinion and educate others about the experience? It's just a discussion, after all.

No we wouldn't have moved it to Bereavement but we might have moved it to a topic called life support choices. Bear in mind we moved it because the thread was causing anguish in the chat topic. I don't think there's an answer to this that spares everyone's feelings, unfortunately.

MNHQ

GeraldineMumsnet · 19/04/2011 09:43

Hello, just flagging that we're moving this thread to new Talk topic, Ethical dilemmas in Other subjects. Justine has posted about it here.

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