Knee replacement at 85

[Barney16]

Has anyone's parent had a knee replacement? And could you tell me what their recovery was like? My mum is determined to investigate whether a knee replacement would help her, admittedly shocking, mobility. She has a consultant appointment next week. I'm completely baffled by how her recovery could be managed. I have asked her about how we would manage and she just says she doesn't know. I suspect she thinks that I and my children would rally round. I am an only child, I work full time and live three hours away. My dad is alive but very frail. Literally every time I try to discuss it she just says she doesn't know and changes the subject.

I’m going to be honest here and say at that age the recovery is likely to be prolonged. A family member had one at 76 about a year ago and hasn’t recovered well at all. They were in hospital for weeks and ended up on ITU though are home now. It all seemed to stem from the operation because at that age their bodies aren’t as able to get over it and one thing leads to the next etc..

I understand she wants to be more mobile but at 85 it will be some recovery that and even if she were able to get it done on the NHS it’ll be a long wait.

My DGran went into respite care for a month after hers (both hips and both knees replaced - the last at 92). Meant she had support and access to physio for the initial healing. Then went home - had meals on wheels coming, used a tv table on wheels to eat off, used a trolley to push anything from room to room instead of carrying anything…that sort of thing. But she was a determined woman!

Besides people without family to rally round are still allowed surgery! They just manage their aftercare differently. You shouldn't try to stop her just because it's inconvenient for you. Mobility is really important for health. It's her life at stake.

My grandad had both knees replaced around that age. He was previously very active, up at 5am and off to work at a supermarket collecting trollies 4 days a week.

While the surgery gave him some relief from pain and helped his general mobility, he never recovered enough to go back to work or be as active as he was before. It had a massive effect on him.

I hate to say this but if she wont do the exercises it wont work. I had day surgery and went home that night with injections to give myself and loads of meds. And I had to demonstrate could get up and down stairs and walk the length of a corridor to be allowed home. Two weeks and was on one crutch, 3 weeks and on a stick. Exercise is crucial

My dad is nearly 70 and had a knee replacement 6 months ago. I also live 3 hours away and am an only child. I had the same concerns. He also only had an upstairs loo (and bedroom)! To be honest the first week was the worst and I had to stay with him, but after that he recovered remarkably well and was able to get up and down the stairs on his bum. It’s definitely manageable in my opinion (after the first week)…

but she never continued exercises

The exercises are extremely important, my mother had both knees replaced ( done a year apart) in her late 70s, she recovered well and did all her exercises, her new knees are great, my father was there to help her in the first few days after the operation but after that she could manage and get around on her own, was walking (slowly) a day after the operation but told not to drive for 6 weeks

Again, the exercises are extremely important and you need to follow all the doctors after care instructions, my mother also had Physio a couple of times during recovery to make sure she was exercising fine, she is loving her new knees

I had this with my dad, OP. Blithely went ahead with the op on the basis he’d ‘be fine’, even though it literally said in the advice minimum 6 week recovery, no driving etc. At the time he was 76 and my mum’s full time carer.

In the event DSis and I had to do round trip drives and AM/PM handovers to provide 24/7 care for them for a month, whilst simultaneously managing our own lives, jobs, kids, homes. It was a slog. Not that our dad wasn’t grateful, but he acknowledged that he’d massively underestimated how long and difficult the recovery would be. For your mum in her 80s it’ll potentially take longer than the 3-4 weeks it took my dad to be properly up and about.

If you can’t provide relatively consistent cover, I’d definitely consider having paid carers come to their home, or as someone else suggested, short term residential care.

My dad’s quality of life was improved without a doubt, but the biggest issue following on from knee surgery is that knees - like hips - come in pairs, and the minute you replace one, the other comes under increased strain and deteriorates more quickly than it might otherwise have done. So you’re often looking at a second surgery in quite a short time frame.

Without trying to worry you, my Dad is waiting for his 3rd knee replacement this year - same knee! All failed. Its been horrendous.

My mum is 88 and had a hip replacement at 85. Not quite the same op but similar recovery period. We too were looking into what kind of care she would need as the hospital leaflet said she would be discharged 72 hours after the op and expected to walk. We figured she would need round the clock care so investigated local nursing homes who do offer temporary stays for recuperation post op but as it was, unsurprisingly, she wasn’t able to walk after 72 hours unlike other patients significantly younger, and the hospital kept her in for over two weeks until she could walk with a frame. My eldest sister did spent the first few nights at home with her to settle her back in. Point I’m making is I think hospitals expect / are willing to look after elderly patients for longer post op recognising they need the additional help.
Wishing you and your mum luck.

I’ve had both knees replaced and one hip - I’m 64. I’m currently on crutches waiting for hip number 2 to be done. Don’t underestimate the pain your mum will be in now. Afterwards it will be very painful to start with but it’s a healing pain rather than the acute bone on bone pain before. My knees were far and away more painful than my hip but there are ways that a bit of planning can help a lot with post op care. My husband and family were out all day so my husband used to make me sandwiches and crisps for lunch and I had a flask of coffee and a bottle of lemonade or squash next to me ready to drink. I stayed upstairs to start with because I couldn’t get comfortable on the sofa and did my exercises in the bedroom. Your mum might well be offered ongoing physio afterwards too to get her full range of movement back I wasn’t allowed out of hospital until I’d bent my knee 90 degrees. Occupational health at the hospital gave me a raised toilet seat and chairs for the bathroom and kitchen so that I could sit and wash and sit and cook. Later on I also got a trolley so that I could make myself a drink and wheel it into the living room. If someone could pop in a couple of times a day to make her food and drinks and make sure she’s ok and do washing etc for her then there’s no reason why she can’t manage. I had both mine done with a spinal anaesthetic and I was awake but it was fine so there is no need to assume a general anaesthetic would be required if she has other health issues. The ability to walk without pain after about 6 - 8 weeks is worth every bit of the pain of the operation.

I have had both knees replaced 18 months apart.Ashamed to say I was 54 and 56 but rheumatoid arthritis affected my knees.
It is a tough operation and so painful.
However its so important to do the exercises as I was lazy with my first knee op. Get plenty of help around the house and someone to shop for you.
A few years on I have a new lease of life. Can walk well with no pain

I had a knee replacement at 52 and I'm relatively fit and healthy otherwise and it was so much more painful than I expected.

Using the toilet and showering in the first couple of weeks we're hard (you can't twist properly to wipe your bum sorry tmi)
It's really really important to do the exercises and they hurt - a lot.
First week or so I couldn't lie down to sleep.
They get you up and walking on crutches the day after the operation and you have to be able to navigate stairs before you can be discharged.
I needed someone around all the time 3 days all the time before I could be left alone, then needed help getting things off the floor, bending down, showering for a couple of weeks after but I'd imagine at your mums age it would be longer.
It was worth it for me because the pain you're in before it is excruciating but I wouldn't underestimate the support and elderly person will need.

My stepdad had an hip replacement at 79. Was up and about just a few days later.

DM had one in January, then aged 82. It was very successful. The key is to do the physio - before and after. She was told she would need somebody to look after her at home for the first week after discharge, so my brother and I shared this.

So apparently people’s experiences vary massively. I have read the whole thread.
It appears that some people are those, that my mum believed before she had it done “it was easy, I was so independent within 3 days, not a big deal, it was nothing” etc.
I had a hip replacement at 57. It hurts, it really hurts. Five hours after the op. I was crying from the pain and begging for pain relief.
For at least, the first week or so, after it, I felt terrible. I regretted the whole thing.
OK, now, 18 months later, I am happy I had it done. BUT please don’t let your mum think that she can have a major operation at her age and suddenly she will be dancing!
I think my mum thought that having a hip replacement would turn back time.
I spoke to her the other day about how her hip is ?
Her answer? Oh, I guess the hip is ok! But I generally am not feeling too clever.

No shit, Sherlock, you also have kidney and thyroid disease, and you’re 83. What did you think would happen when they cut you up??????

They took me in to see mum, after the op.
She cried to me, and looked like a little old lady. When they took me into the ward, I didn’t recognise her. she is an “always on” . Wears trainers, jeans, make up and goes to Toni and Guy for her hair, which is always coloured and blow dried.
After the op, she looked old, tired and grey. If I could give my opinion again, I would absolutely tell her not to do it.
BUT, she was not in a huge amount of pain at the end! Weirdly she had a lot of pain for the 3/4 years when the process started but the year before the op she was OK.
As I said to mum, when we were discussing it for the eleventith time. The only problem with osteoarthritis is pain.
It won’t kill you, it won’t turn into a terrible other disease. It literally causes pain, or doesn’t.
The simple conversation is, how bad is your pain?
The op (apparently knees are much worse) does not make your joints 30 years younger. It will hurt, it will take a while to get over, and (in my opinion based on my mum’s experience) I am really not sure it’s worth it, unless the patient loves hiking etc and feels destroyed by a lack of mobility.
The decision, always, how much pain right now, versus, how much pain/confusion after?
Realistically, the only one who can make the decision is your mum

I should have been clearer - DGran went into respite for a month each time, after each of her 4 operations. She did the physio and recovered very well - she was still living independently at 95, and another illness meant she needed to go into care just before she turned 96. Her 1st op was when she was 78.

My DM also had her knee done a couple of years ago in her mid 70s. She stayed in hospital for 3 days and came home with DF looking after her. She was relatively diligent in doing the exercises (unusual for her), and her mobility is back - she has other medical conditions which slow her down but she’s back to walking pretty well and without pain on that side - but she’s also said she is not rushing to get the other knee done despite the pain in that, as it was a painful recovery. And frustrating - as DF is not the maternal caring type in reality, he gets frustrated at inactivity and thought she’d be mobile again much quicker.

My mum (79) had recently had a full knee replacement and the hospital wouldn’t discharge her till they’d spoken to me and I’d assured them I’d be with her for the first week and that someone would be around to help for the 2nd.
She was in a lot of discomfort for the first week. Sleeping was a problem for her even with pain meds.
She was moving around pretty well on crutches straight away and getting up and down stairs well.
There was no way she could have stood to prepare a meal for the first 2 weeks, so fortunate that there was always someone around to help.
8 weeks on and she’s doing brilliantly. Driving, walking the dog and practically pain free for the first time in years!

I think you have to be very realistic about the caring requirements. When my relative had it in his early 60s he came out with two carrier bags full of pain killers. He recovered well but needed people around in the early days and it definitely wasn’t a walk in the park even being relatively young.

Hospitals are also bad places for old people. Many come out in a worse state than when they went in. That side of things would also be a factor in my thinking now unfortunately. If she’s very resilient and able to do the physio and is absolutely bloody minded then I’d be more likely to consider it then if she’s in any way frail.

Is it a full knee replacement or a partial knee replacement? My dad had a partial done at 85 and it was straightforward. Maybe a full is much harder to cope with.

Another thing that is quite common after surgery in the elderly, particularly those with some cognitive decline, is post-operative delirium. My mother had a hysterectomy for severe prolapse at nearly 90 and was pretty batshit for a week (thought my sister - who died - and I were living in our childhood bedroom).

Hello everyone, thank you for all your comments they have been really helpful. So an update is that mum has seen a specialist and will have a full knee replacement probably within the next three months. I will take leave so I can be around in the first couple of weeks. She's very tough so I think the operation will be fine. On the plus side now it's going to happen we have been able to have several conversations about the post op recovery. She is now convinced that she needs a bed downstairs. What are people's thoughts. I have explained everything everyone has said about how she must do the exercises, it's non negotiable. I guess I'm worried that she's going to literally take to her bed.

My mother ( late 70s) was able to go up and down the stairs the day she came home from hospital

They made me do stairs before leaving hospital. I’d ask drs advice… but really getting her going cat much movement as possible will be important. I’d say don’t get a bed downstairs if it can be avoided.

Hi OP, can I ask what decision your mum came to, and any recovery tips? My mum is a similar age and has a knee replacement coming up in Nov. She has a lot of other health issues, including cancer and is quite frail. I'm really concerned, but her oncologist has given the go ahead ( I thought they would advise against). I live a similar distance away and have young kids, but we do have other family nearby who can help. My mum is also not really planning her recovery...wants to wait and see what she will need.