Falls and needing a wee in the small hours

[Topsyturvey10]

The challenge is my elderly mother had just had her knee done, she wants a wee regular as clockwork in the early hours of the morning. I’m worried that this is the time she might fall, I’ve already got Alexa’s in the house and am looking at wristbands to notify me but I wondered if there is any advice out there about reducing the need for a wee?

I'm changing her to decaf tea bags and stopping her having them after 8pm. I don’t really know what else to do?

A general question, how does everyone else manage elderly parents who live alone? I’m not far away but I work FT and I can’t ever see me being able to have a holiday or trip away again. There are no other siblings that can help.

As @Enrichetta said, she needs a commode. I work for the ambulance service and most are resistant to the idea, but spelling out the reality ie, broken hip, never walk again, months in hospital, never returning home usually changes their minds. Frame it as a temporary measure. And definitely don’t restrict fluids, CKD will get her if a fall doesn’t.

If she is able she can empty it herself In the morning so she doesn't have to bother anyone or feel like she is bothering.

My MIL has just got a commode after coming out of hospital for an op - they sent her home with a commode and a walking trolley with wheels. She lives in a bungalow and the bathroom is right next door to bedroom so she never considered she’d find it useful but she really really does after just a couple of weeks. So handy and easy for her to use, and she can put the bucket bit on the walking trolley to take through if she’s too wobbly to carry it.

She’s had an emergency bracelet for ages now, always wears it, plus a key safe. Plus just started having carers coming in for a bit during the day to help with food prep.

Thank you all so much for your suggestions, I’m going to broach the commode conversation later. She was unhappy when I suggested keeping the frame around the toilet long term until I said it would be like doing some triceps dips and build her upper body strength. She is very stubborn.

She was unhappy about me suggesting an hour of help in the mornings and wants to do it herself but I think I managed to talk her round. I said if I came over you’d accept
it 🤷‍♀️ I can’t be there every morning, I start work at 8 and it’s nearly an hour away.

She has said she would find an electric bed helpful so that’s next on the list too. I read somewhere to have a single rather than double as if she requires more care in future some carers refuse to help turn them if they are in a double?

I’m going to order the CPR guardian watch too and one of those gadgets to help her get the compression socks on, those bloody things are the work of the devil.

If there's a pride angle the ‘you don’t want an ambulance to have to come because you’ve called and you have to explain you didn’t think you needed it. Better some extra things to lean on if you need them than that’.

If there's a pride angle the ‘you don’t want an ambulance to have to come because you’ve called and you have to explain you didn’t think you needed it. Better some extra things to lean on if you need them than that’.