Healthy way to gain weight - for an elderly man

[glowfrog]

Hi all, not sure if it’s quite the right place to ask but my father (84) has recently been unwell and lost about 10kg - and it’s not weight he can afford not to have. Im visiting him next week for a week and would like to try and help him regain a little weight. Any recommendations for generally healthy meals and snacks to do that? I need to see if he’s happy to eat nuts. He says he’s got appetite but just can’t eat much.

I think you'd be better off asking MNHQ to move this to the elderly parents section.

My mum is 86 and she also lost a huge amount of weight for no reason. I initially tried to encourage her to eat calorie dense foods, but she doesn't really need the calories and she has a very delicate stomach.

is his doctor concerned? There was a point where they prescribed special drinks (fortisip) but that was more linked to hospital stays and things. You can buy Fortisip.

So either ask MNHQ to move this, or post on there, and it helps to have a general picture of his health.

Not the same but when my daughter had to gain weight the dietician said it was easier to maximise calories per mouthful than increase food intake. She suggested brushing olive oil over fish fingers, waffles etc. High sugar breakfasts like cocoa pops. Gold topped milk as it's almost cream. It goes against everything were taught but high sugar, high fat is the quickest way.

Buy some full fat milk powder and add it to everything. Soups, tea, cereal, mashed potato etc, stir in a couple of tablespoons at every opportunity. It will add calories without altering the flavour or texture too much.

It must be full fat, not the coffee creamer type, that's usually skimmed. Nestle do one called Nido and you can usually find it in the international aisle or in a Caribbean shop.

My dad ate rice pudding after dinner every night, the doctor said it was great to keep weight on. I know he was on special shakes every day to help keep energy up,

Milkshakes, Complan and cheese omelettes are my go to when I have needed to out in weight.

Unless theres diabetes or such like, I wouldn't worry too much about whether its healthy, just make sure there's not too many nasties. I've reverted to old fashioned foods such as Shepherd's Pie, Cottage Pie etc. It can be an effort to eat, so foods that can be eaten easily before they lose their appetite are best. Sometimes by the time they've chewed a few mouthfuls, they feel full, so meals that don't need to be chewed as much tend to be fully eaten.

Don't underestimate the power of a pudding! My parent has a Magnum every day at lunch and usually one of the Bonne Maman creamy desserts for supper. Their weight has been stable for a few years now.

@EmeraldRouletteyes, that would have been the better place to put this thread, you’re right! 🤦🏻‍♀️ I’ll make the request.

Based on my experience with my Mum I’d focus on his favourite foods, regardless of whether or not they are terribly healthy. Things he loves will stimulate his appetite more than eating things he feels he “should” eat. Small meals or snacks often, with a cuppa to help keep him hydrated too. The little Bon Maman desserts, esp rice and custard, are easy to eat if he likes that sort of thing.

You don’t say if he cooks for himself, but as you are staying a week maybe cooking a batch of a couple of dishes that he really likes and freezing in small portions? This really worked for Mum, much more appealing and nutritious than bought ready meals, the portions were just right for her, and they just needed heated up. Tender slow cooked casseroles, pasta with nice creamy, cheesy sauce, soups like chicken and rice all went down really well.

Have a nice stay with your Dad, I hope that he recovers well. x

You can get build up drinks in various flavours from chemist's. Full of nutrients.
Eg https://www.easymedshealth.com/products/ensure-plus-bottle-nutritional-drinks-assorted-flavours-6x200ml?gad_source=4&gclid=EAIaIQobChMI69jB8PHCjAMVD4FQBh3bDDfWEAQYCSABEgKfePD_BwE

@glowfrogI posted here about weight loss once and got firmly told it’s a chat about weight lifting 😬
so yes ask for it to be moved.

@notatinydancerI'm trying to do that but I haven’t figured out how yet! Do you have to report it first?

I thought it was a board to talk about weight generally 🙈

@notatinydancerha! Yes, I just had to report it.

thank you to everyone who’s commented.

Fortisip/Ensure is the go to for hospitals. But they generally don't taste great.

It's important to maintain not just weight but muscle, so fat is good for calories make sure you're topping up protein as well (and encourage gentle exercise if possible - especially resistance training; it can help appetite as well as building muscle).

Nuts are good snacks, if his teeth are up to it. Protein bars aimed at weight lifters (rather than the sort aimed at dieters) often have a decent calorie count. And meal replacement products can be used as meal supplements - Huel do bars that are a bit like a Snickers.

Can you get a referral to a dietitian for him? They can request GP’s to prescribe oral nutrition supplements such as Calogen, ensure drinks, fortified soups etc.

In the meantime maximise the calorie intake of everything that he has. Milk powder can be mixed into full fat milk (for on cereals, drinks, rice puddings etc), use butter and cream whenever possible.

Most importantly has the cause of the recent illness been correctly identified and treated?

I wouldn't worry too much about the healthy, he just needs extra protein and fats so stuff like cottage pie made with the cheap higher fat mince, lamb shepherds pie, etc. And some proper desserts like crumble and custard just for the calories.

The thing is that lots of calories dense food that is recommended for weight gain is high in fat. Fat is both highly satiating and can be hard on a delicate stomach can cause bowel issues etc in large amounts if you aren't used to it.

I would recommend a diet with more carbohydrate. Fruit, especially banana works well. Think about liquid calories as they don't fill you up. Smoothies and fruit juices. Eating carbs/sugar will fuel the appetite more. High quality biscuits to eat with his tea, custard with pudding. Think easy to eat and add to his usual diet.

Contact the GP and he should be prescribed some meal replacement sachets which are high calorie. The nurse should also visit and keep an eye on his weight alongside any GP investigations (This was my experience of when this happened to my mum)

Agreeing with all the above, but I came here to say CAKE! My mum & partner just ate less and less, while saying they were eating loads and well satisfied, thank you. Despite their ever-shrinking meals and wobbly health, though, neither of them got that old-skinny look. My stepfather's hobby was baking cakes. He died last year (at 99) and Mum's starting to look wasted 😢

I now send her cakes and chocolates. Do bear in mind that calories are the primary nutritional requirement. We've all been (rightly) indoctrinated to maximise food 'value' while minimising calories, but you'll die a lot faster from caloric insufficiency than a protein or vitamin shortfall.

I think if your dad is in his 80s, then it’s more about gaining weight, rather than prioritising eating healthily. My parents GP gave them a leaflet and it was all about adding fat and sugar to foods so that they had the extra calories without the bulk. So full cream milk, extra grated cheese on meals, eat a cake rather than an apple (although maybe tinned fruit and cream would be good as fibre is still important). Also look at the milkshakes and soups with the extra nutrients in the chemists.

This is the problem we have at the moment with my dad. On the one hand he was trying to eat lower carb last year because he was pre diabetic, despite being slightly too thin, but not underweight, was in hospital and lost weight due to that, is really lacking in body fat, but doesnt like higher fat foods, they upset his stomach, limited in what he can chew as he has no teeth and no dentures.

Dont know what we can get in him. He doesnt want to eat sweet stuff, but equally doesnt have a massive appetite.

@MamaBoboyes, I’m thinking about things I might be able to batch cook for him. I’ll have to see what I can do once I’m there as he’s got an odd kitchen - in the sense that he has very few utensils or Tupperware etc so it’s not as easy to cook there as you’d like. I’ve bought him extra in the past but they tend to go missing. I might just have to buy him more!

Mashed banana with double cream or full fat Greek yoghurt is easy to swallow which can be an issue affecting appetite. As others have said I'd worry about ease of eating, whether it causes indigestion or other digestive issues and calorie content rather than whether it's healthy.

When I need to put on weight I don't want to feel like I'm eating storage so whilst something like macaroni cheese will help gain weight I feel it's too heavy on my stomach so I have cauliflower cheese instead with a lot of cheese!

@Muchtoomuchtodohe had a kidney infection that then came back and bladder issues - they found polyps on his bladder and he’s had an MRI and a biopsy but still waiting on results for both. He’s in France (we are French, I just happen to live in the UK) so it’s been frustrating for me not to be able to be there and push for answers (although my dad’s not a shy wallflower, either!).

The worst part has been the pain every time he had urine passing through - it makes it very very difficult for him to sleep and I think that’s why he’s gone downhill. He can’t seem to get much help to manage this pain or with figuring out what’s causing it.

@soupyspoon that does sound worrying for your dad. Does he have a referral for a nutritionist or similar within NHS? I am aware that low carb can help where people do have diabetes but if it is going to cause your dad to lose weight further that seems a worry. Sometimes if someone’s body struggles with fats, it is easier to digest them when taken with carbohydrate, eg being able to eat butter on toast or cream with a pie but not on their own (examples but not helpful to your dad). What about making up some soups maybe with root vegetables like sweet potato and beans and liquidising for him, or smoothies with banana and nut butter.