My grandad completely forgot he took out a lifetime mortgage

[hobbitum]

A few hours ago I didn't even know what a lifetime mortgage was and wish I didn't now!

My grandad is 90 and thought he had paid off his mortgage. He was getting annual statements that he was putting to one side and not looking at properly thinking they were just a formality.

He was informed this week a new provider was taking it over and his friend saw the letter and realised what has happened. He has made no repayments or paid off any interest for who knows how long.

My grandad doesn't remember taking this remortgage out and it now looks as if it will take his home and every penny of his when he's gone.

The more I find out the more I'm worried there is no recourse and his own awful mistake. He's devastated, completely shocked and feels a failure - I think this will seriously affect his health which is my main concern. He is of sound mind.

I don't know why I'm posting here to be honest - surely mortgage lenders should be checking in on customers like this and doing a bit more than just sending standard letters and waiting to take everything when you die? I just don't know how he could have got himself into this situation. What on Earth can I do to help?

You do not have enough information to make that assertion. Go and bully someone else.

A harsh but fair enough question in the circs. Yes he is worried about having something to leave and yes, I would be the main beneficiary.

It's a matter of his dignity right now, he's shocked and ashamed and feeling guilty that there will be nothing left when he always planned that there would be.

That is neither here nor there. I'm worried this will impact his health and blight his final years, it's just such a stressful shock for him.

Exactly this. It seems like OP is also worried about his estate having to pay for anything after his death - well, that is normal for anyone who dies.

He has made no repayments or paid off any interest for who knows how long

Do you know if he was making payments and then stopped? if so, why? I wonder if there is any mileage in arguing that the equity release provider should have been more proactive, rather than let the interest build up.

I feel sorry for your grandad. He is not the first to be caught out by these schemes.

Then you need to reassure him, don't you?

"Grandad, I don't want anything from you when you die. All that matters is that you have enough money to live on now, and enjoy your life."

Job done.

It's a matter of his dignity right now, he's shocked and ashamed and feeling guilty that there will be nothing left when he always planned that there would be

I think you need to work hard on reassuring him that this doesn't matter.

Cross post with @TallulahBetty !

But he must have understood that it needed to be repaid…

I don't like these predatory lending practices. Do look into it if only to give the financial institution a headache.

But as far as our DGD is concerned, all the communication should be a 'you can't take it with you' and reassurance that you don't;t care one way or the other.

I'm sorry, it's very hard when an older relative feels shame and guilt. It feels awful when you want them to feel safe and loved.

This. It needs to be talked about briefly and then put to bed forever. He shouldn’t be ashamed at not leaving an inheritance, that’s not right.

@hobbitum that sounds really rough and agree with others that seems that his stress and mental health is the main concern here as he still has the home. Apologies this isn’t very specific advice and I am writing quickly so not well phrased but would any of the mental health / money related charities and advice groups or something like Samaritans potentially be of help for advice? Not so much re the mortgage but about how to support and reassure him mentally.l in this situation.

if leaving money / home to family was extremely important to him perhaps you can look to reassure him by emphasising all the non-material things he has given the family as his legacy (memories etc)

It might be worth exploring whether your grandad was properly advised. The FCA has found that firms have been pretty lax in many cases:

https://www.fca.org.uk/news/press-releases/review-later-life-mortgages-finds-poor-advice-and-misleading-promotions

Doesn’t sound like he’s been cheated! He was of sound mind. He didn’t read his letters properly. No wonder he’s mortified. It s certainly a lesson to everyone give post more than a glance and then go stick them in the drawer!

Thanks all, I know how odd it sounds and it's clear I don't know the extent of his affairs. He has been very independent until recently and I have been trying to help him more with things he had started to struggle with.

I wasn't expecting any traction at all really but just wondered if this was something anyone had experience of.

Interesting to hear it is an area of finance that has been tightened up as it does seem a murky corner of the industry.

@hobbitum please, before making any sorry of payment check that the money was lent to him legally and the debt is actually owed.

Find all the paperwork and take it and him to citizens advice. Don't just assume it was done legitimately. Please!

But how can they?

See my post about the FCA investigations. The behaviour of equity release firms is not always what it should be,

See my post above.

"Grandad, I don't want anything from you when you die. All that matters is that you have enough money to live on now, and enjoy your life."

What more could they have done? They sent letter which he’s ignored for years. They weren’t trying to hide the arrangement he just did not want to know.

It’s sad he is surprised but if he was of sound mind but chose to ignore mortgage letters there is no one else to blame. And I would question who of sound minds knows squarely nothing about their own mortgage and deliberate ignores letters?

Unless they actually advised him not to pay, it’s hard to imagine a scenario where they’d be held accountable, really?

Well, there was a suggestion of how upthread.

Depends on the sort of people they are really and whether they care more about Grandad or the money they now won't get.

And again just to reiterate I am not interested in any inheritance, I just can't bear the idea of the rest of his life being unhappy and unhealthy because of this.

Well I do feel sorry for your grandad, yes he might be sound of mind but he wouldn't be the first - or the last - person to not fully understand equity release.... I know it's not something I'm fully competent in.
Can you try and go through the paperwork and see if you can work out when he borrowed the money, he must know what he spent it on?? .... and what he now owes?. I agree with other PP to try and re-assure him around leaving you inheritance.