Hospital lied! Wwyd?

[ReallyBadEyeDeer]

Hi I don't know if there's even any point making a fuss about this but am so hurt and angry. Elderly parent has been in hospital a long while following fall and confusion. Much better now but still comes out with very odd things and routinely believes they are somebody else, are in a different place, that things have happened which haven't or people are different to who they actually are.

Hospital is now preparing to discharge as nothing physically wrong, asked me if I still had any concerns and I said yes as they still seem intermittently delusional, occasionally very angry (quite verbally agressive) towards me, and various staff members at the hospital have mentioned suspected dementia to me but apparently they're not allowed to make a dementia diagnosis whilst in hospital- I stated that concerns me as I will not be able to provide care when they come out and elderly parent lives alone.

Discharge notes have come through saying I - not they- had reported elderly parent showing signs of severe dementia since going to hospital. Plus a range of other misquoted things taken completely out of context. They say very little about their own observations other than that a cognitive test was done and give the score which is exactly on threshold for dementia (again, not stated in the report). It's all things I've said. Plus a recommendation fir further assessment once discharged.

Of course my parent is now incredibly cross with me because it looks like I'm saying they've got dementia and am the one that's kept them in hospital all that time. I feel like I've been totally stitched up and am now left not only having to deal with someone undiagnosed but possibly with dementia, certainly delusional, when they come out but also now who doesn't trust me and with a fractured relationship. This has also gone to their GP which isn't going to help my relationship with them if ever needed.

Is there even any point putting in a complaint? What should I do? Its been an awful time anyway and this just feels like a kick in the teeth.

@Greybeardy That makes complete sense and fits with why some of the ward staff mentioned dementia and others delirium. BUT my issue in all this is that either way- they did mention it to me when they possibly shouldn't have. Yet the notes make it look like I've come up with it myself. If those notes weren't going to my parent that's fine, doesn't really matter who flags it to the GP (although surely looks more credible as an observation from the ward staff, which it was). But what it's done now is create a relationship issue with my parent, which I do think they should be more sensitive about in how they word these things.

This, in spades.

Not having P of As can, and very often does, cause endless massive headaches.

I would try and overlook that and focus on what care plan they have made for her upon discharge.

Have they simply assumed that it is post operative delirium, and do they consider that the underlying cause of the delirium is being treated or managed? Delirium absolutely should be mentioned in a discharge letter, as it is very serious, can cause irreversible mental and physical decline, and can recur post discharge. If they have documented (badly!) your concerns about cognitive symptoms and they haven’t followed up looking into delirium then that may well be something to complain about.