Training to be a primary teacher, very discouraged.

[jennifersofia]

I am nearly done with my PGCE, which I will finish but the trouble is, I wonder if I should actually teach. The truth is I just don't enjoy it very much. I find it so stressful, and so tiring, and most of the time I feel overwhelmed by a feeling of failure. I don't feel that I have really cracked the behaviour thing, and feel that most of my lessons are boring, lack creativity, pitched at the wrong level (which of course has the dual impact of not helping them learn and affecting behaviour), and too bound to the strategies. Days that I have felt happy and relaxed with a modicum of confidence in the classroom I could count on one hand.
I know it is different when you have your own class, and things (maybe) get easier, but many teachers I have spoken to say that it usually gets better after 2-4 years. Don't know if I can stick it out for that long if it feels like this. It is affecting my relationship with my own children and my husband - they mostly see someone who is short tempered and too busy to give them much attention.
Oh! I feel quite upset and unhappy about this - what should I do? I don't want to go back to a stupid job that means nothing to me, I know I wasn't happy being a SAHM, yet I really have doubts about whether or not I can make a good go at this.

Hi js, i worked for both timeplan and protocol, who were both really cool. I would phone up the lea and ask how they work supply - some leas have their own supply list, or contact schools directly. Also speak to any schools you have worked in, to let them know you are available for work.
When i did supply i always had a "goody bag" with me, with stickers, magnetic letters and numbers, wipe board pens, chalk, favourtie story book, number fans, poetry / rhyme book, dice, special thing (to talk about!) etc. In the car i also kept a couple of folders with maths and english worksheets in, just in case. Oh and an a to z!
If you need any more advice on supply work, feel free to cat me, its a couple of years now since i have done it, but i doubt much has changed!

Brilliant fee77, I will remember that. Thanks for the help.

Just like to add my bit to what everyone else has said - don't give up! Everything everyone has said is so true. I hated my PGCE year and I was also young and single - am awed that you have done it with a family. There are bits I still hate - teaching PE for example - but at the end of the day it's the little things that make it worthwhile. Little boy in my class got SO excited on Monday during a puppet show and ended up standing up and shouting "Excuse me Mr Puppet Man! The dog's getting out of the box!!!" :O This was in the hall and ALL the infants were in there. think that supply teaching could be very lonely and maybe not well supported. You need all the friends you can get in teaching!

jennifersofia, I did my PGCE at the Institute - career change after 10 years in industry. It's well known for being an extremely rigorous and tough course. Lots of good advice from others already to which I can't really add, except to say do try to go on and complete your NQT year to gain full QTS - it's "in the bag" then so to speak.

I found my NQT year very tough (but then barmy things were happening, like I mentored a student teacher in the first term !), but it was nowhere near as bad as the PGCE year.

Is Dr Jeni Riley still at the Institute?

Good luck

Thanks for the encouragement Puff and Lara2. Just have 2 more days at college and then finished the course - (and it looks like I have passed!) feeling rather relieved. Job not much a possibility at the moment as everyone has hired (even in London!), but will definitely keep trying.
Yes, Puff, Dr. Riley has been at IOE for this past year, but I think she is either retiring or changing position (maybe to do more research?) and has left being head of school - they now have Andrew Pollard coming on board (but not exactly sure in what position). Can't believe you had to mentor someone in your first term!