an interesting rationale for choosing a private primary school??

[Twiglett]

was chatting to a nice woman today, turns out she lives very near to DS's pre-school (and future primary school), however they don't send their kids there because

by sending their children to private education they free up resource in the state system

... what do you think of that??

Err, we are geographicaly distant as well, as I live in the East Midlands. However the school feels that it has a duty to the wider community and funds a state school!

You can't knock that can you?

Your argument is that pivate schools are not 'part of the community'. I tell you that my kids school is, because they put their money where their charitable mouth is, and then you say it is no good because my kids will not mix with the state school. Well they can't because we are too far appart. But it still means that there are kids getting a good education because a private comany pays.

This may be a shocking thing to say, but I actually don't want my children to mix with kids in very deprived areas.
Many of these kids are good kids with parents struggling to do their best in difficult circumstances but equally many are not.
I was brought up in a very deprived area and was lucky enough to get a good enough ed to get me out. I will always teach my kids how lucky they are and how others are less fortunate but no less equal. (I dont mean that in a patronising way)
The bottom line is I want better for them!

hmb,

the best service to the community would be to knock down some barriers, instead of reinforcing them by funding 2 separate schools! There are no two locations in the British Isles that are further apart than the class differences!!

As I said, I was "inside" the privileged fold, but actually, I dont think thats the best preparation for life.

i agree with what homemama said i also work in the "state" sector rather than private (but as a dentist rather than in education) and politically would prefer my children to go to a state school, but it really does depend on the area you live in as to what that school is like, i do however feel it is strange that people make up excuses as to why they send there kids to a private school, if you have the money and wish to do it why not just say so at the end of the day a parent does what is right/best for their child not for the common good

homemama,
I do admire people who come out with unsayable truths! I dont want my children growing up in a deprived area either. I want them to grow up in a community where rich and poor people live side by side, so that my children will know both rich and poor people.

And I see, every day in a comprehensive school, the fact that there is very little meaningful mixing between children from different classes.

And I went to a crap state school and had the shit kicked out of me for wanting to better myself.

As a parent who USED to send her kids to private school, i found generally that i felt the need to justify / apologise for my choice to parents who didnt privately educate their kids. I am sure that this woman hoped you would think better of her for her reason.
Now my kids are in the state system i find peoples attitude towards my choice totally different in a "welcome to the real world" kind of way. I would certainly never question / discriminate against a parent who chose private. We were just lucky enough to get into a good village state school

hmb, I barely even spoke to a comprehensive school kid until I went to Oxford University! Yes, that great bastion of social equality.

With respect, and I have great sympathy for bully victims, I dont think a private school solves the bullying problem in the long term, but I dont really want to go into a lot of detail about why I think that. its just my own opinion.

Where I grew up, you faced trouble if your car was too new, your clothes too clean or God forbid you didn't truant from school and sit on the front step with your mother having a fag!
My parents wanted better for us and I want better for mine.
But I make no pretences that I'm doing it to help the state sector but for the reasons aforementioned.

we lived in a place like that at one time. We didnt have any trouble of that sort cos they were all scared of dx!

Homemama, are you my long lost sister?

NN, I might have been the comprehensive girl that you finaly got to meet in Oxford.

And I can still tell you that there is little mixing in your bog standard comprehensive school between people of different family backgrounds. It isn't the nice fuzzy melthing pot that you seem to think that it is.

I know that bullying does go on in private schools but I don't want my dd or ds to have to hide the fact that they are bright, as I had to, every day they go to school. I don't want them to have to be embarased when they are sucessful. I want them to go to a school where sucess is more the norm.

And yes I'd love all schools to be like that but they are not. And while they are not I will not sacrifice my kids education on the alter of 'equality'. I do my bit for the state sector, more than my bit if I'm being honest. I feel no guilt, I sleep at night.

what I meant was, it is a considerable difference just to go in through the same door as ordinary kids, instead of seeing them from a fast moving car.

now Ill tell you my solution; kids at school in France! equality, no sacrifice and bilingualism, hurrah!

Im not going to ask what college you were at, you might remember me and I was a stuck up little cow in those days!

You Oxford girls are making this Warwick girl feel like she's out of her depth!
HMB, maybe if I'd taken a beaten a bit more often I would have pushed myself to turn that B into another A!

I had an offer of AAB from Oxford, and Ive often wondered if that was because of my school, ie if they would have said AAA if I was from a comprehensive. I went to one of the less prestigious colleges, so maybe thats why.

My sister did an MA at Warwick!

I was offered two Es, I kid you not! But that was in the good old days of the enterence exams

oh - I didnt know it had been abolished. It was pretty stressful.

off home now, goodnight!

Me too!
Think we may have hijacked the thread ladies! tut tut!

Harking on about "community" again, I also have kids at a local primary school and I cannot see how their community is superior to the prep school one. I don't think many parents any kind of warm, fuzzy, all-for-one spirit, and there are plenty of politics about party invitations. It's actually quite an insular community in that they do not mix at all with other schools, and do little for others outside school.

As for social mix, there is no guarantee that it is going to reflect that of the catchment area or wider area - too many parents exercise their parental rights about choice in schools.

I used to teach in a bog standard comprehensive and I would agree totally with others have said about very little mixing among the different social groups. I'd even go as far as saying that there is more mixing in private schools, because despite their limited population, once they are in school, everyone is the same.

Nightynight I went to a less prestigious college and met old Etonians (and a 2E offer luckily ;o) hmb went to a prestigious college though

The health argument does hold water btw because the private patients aren't operated on in NHS time. Whether that should be allowed or not is a whole different matter.

Message withdrawn

jj, not sure i would descibe my collage as prestigious ! Rich, thick and full of clots, and all that!

hmb- and tourists!