How far would you travel to get to a good school?

[redskyatnight]

Friend of a friend has her DD's name down to start Reception at a local very well regarded private pre-prep in September 2009.

Nothing wrong with that ... but the school is 25 minutes drive away on a good day, and goodnes knows how long away during the school run. I think she's bonkers but friend reckons it is worth it to go the good school (there are other closer quite acceptable IMO state and private schools she could go to).

How far would you consider travelling to take your DC to school?

I know someone who is insistent her 3-year-old dd goes to a school which could easily take more than an hour to reach in the rush hour when traffic is hell on earth round us. 25 mins is the best possible circs.

I find it very strange because it's not even that good a school though it has fancy facilities, and her dd also has a place at an excellent school five mins' walk from her (though it doesn't have acres and acres of grounds which to this mother is the key issue).

The mother says it's fine because there's a school bus, but a) I wouldn't be too happy putting a four year old on the school bus at least for the first few weeks and b) the poor child will end up spending two hours a day on a bus in gridlock.

Each to her own, as ever ...

I had my DDs name down for a school that was 22 miles away. When it came to it I realised that this just wouldn't work for us and whilst it is a fantastic school we changed our minds. I currently travel about 15 mins (7 ish miles) and find that is far enough tbh.

I think our oldest didn't suffer on the school bus. They weren't allowed on it for the first few weeks until they had settled in and after that there is a big girl who is a coach steward who looks after them. She did bits of home work on it, made friends etc and it helped her become self reliant having to make sure she had all her kit and didn't lose it and we met at the other end by our nanny at coach pick up time. It was quite fun. And if you get to go to a really good school that's a small price to pay I think. Obviously we looked at moving near the school too although that didn't work out and in the lower sixth she passed her driving test and some days would drive herself to school.

For primary, no more than about 15 minutes as I like them to have local friends. I decided not to sit mine for a lovely prep school about 8 miles away because it would take about 45 to get to and people would be travelling 45 minutes in all directions and it would be just my luck that my DC would choose the most remote child as his best friend and I really couldn't be doing that kind of run to pick up from playdates when I work and have other children.

For secondary I'd certainly consider a much longer journey not least because I wouldn't consider our local secondaries as a realistic option and all the ones on my radar involve at least a 45 minute journey on public transport or on the coach. I think for secondary an hour is fine but they'd have to be doing it themselves.

I second what Xenia said. The school coaches are a fantastic way to get to school and to bond with peers if the school runs them.

For primary, no more than about 15 minutes as I like them to have local friends. I decided not to sit mine for a lovely prep school about 8 miles away because it would take about 45 to get to and people would be travelling 45 minutes in all directions and it would be just my luck that my DC would choose the most remote child as his best friend and I really couldn't be doing that kind of run to pick up from playdates when I work and have other children.

For secondary I'd certainly consider a much longer journey not least because I wouldn't consider our local secondaries as a realistic option and all the ones on my radar involve at least a 45 minute journey on public transport or on the coach. I think for secondary an hour is fine but they'd have to be doing it themselves.

I second what Xenia said. The school coaches are a fantastic way to get to school and to bond with peers if the school runs them.

Message withdrawn

.. and a school coach is better for the environment and easier where both parents work full time. It was easier for us to put three children on school coaches at 7.45am and then go to work than get them to school for 8.30am. It becomes in effect a kind of before school club almost, a life saver.

I have no problem with school buses, I think they're great

I don't understand in this case why the woman concerned wants to send her four-year-old dc to a school that's generally regarded as pretty average (it's certainly not Habs or NLCS Xenia ()an hour or so away when she lives within minutes of some much better schools. In fact I'm wondering if I know the same woman as the OP. I can see at 11, you might have decided that a mediocre school was right for your dc and worth the journey but not at reception

jujumaman - wondered if we knew the same woman also LOL! But no school bus in my "friend's" case (can see that school bus would make journey easier). And to make matters worth, she'll have to (presumably, can't think what else she'll do with him) drag her 2 year old along for the ride.

This is a good school, but it's pre-prep, I guess I think that I'd want a 4 year old much more local and think about travelling a bit further once they are 7.

But each to their own and all that.

I have to agree with the people who say being miles from a school affects the social side

I lived about a mile away from my school and after the age of about 11 I cycled there. Our house was in a very central location and as a result it was the centre of a lot of my gang's activities - great for me. Friends who lived in outlying villages and were reliant on buses or their parents driving them had a much harder time, they also did a lot of hanging around smoking in cafes by the time they were 14/15 or so while waiting for their lift in whatever shape it took.

But this was 20+ years ago (very old emoticon).I think parents today are much more prepared to drop everything to act as chauffeur and organise their dcs' after-school lives. Not sure if this is a good thing.

At Haberdashers seniors anyway they put you in a class with girls who live near you - the 4 or 5 classes are on where you live lines which is a good plan.

Also my father drove us to school every day until we were 17 or 18 and that was a plus not a minus. We read him articles from newspapers, the Times Leader column etc and talked about all kinds of subjects, careers, schools, general chat, psychiatry. The time you have driving a child to school in the car can be a big benefit to a child just as I felt ours got a lot out of the school coach.

I used to have a 3 hour round trip on a bus to high school, I HATED it, even though my school was very good. I was always tired and none of my friends lived anywhere near me. I have vowed never to put my kids through that.

My DSs travelled 16 miles to school - journey over an hour by school coach or car at school run time from 7+. DS2 has subsequently changed schools and still goes about 16 miles to school, although the new journey is slightly more tortuous. They are both at the right schools for them but I was only saying to a friend the other night that I regrett the lack of local friends and the fact that even though DS1 is now a teenager he is still completely dependent on me and my car for all social activites. (We are quite rural as well..)

I think it takes more of a toll on me than them in some respects. They get on the coach on a normal day and plug into DS/ipod gossip with mates. Any after school activity and I am driving the same tedious congested route I have done for years. Actually I've started going extra long ways round just for variety.

Still planning on doing it for DD as well though.