Home education vs school education

[BumpLoading]

My 6 year old is currently in year 1 and I constantly play with the idea of home schooling!

I’ve got a few friends who currently home school so would have friends to help me out with ideas, I also feel like I would enjoy having my son home and teaching him immensely. However I also have two other small children so maybe I’m thinking of it through rose tinted glasses and it would be too chaotic to teach at home yet?

I appreciate there’s lots of benefits to school and my son although does moan about going I get the impression he enjoys it when he is there and has friends in school.

Just wondering what others opinions are on home schooling vs normal school!

@BumpLoading , my elder son and his wife homeschool our eldest grandson, their other two children are not yet old enough for school but the soon to be three year old is learning Spanish like his brother and recognises letters and knows their sounds. Our older grandson is just six, he’s at least a year ahead in all subjects, is learning to play the recorder and piano, he’s happy with lots of friends he sees frequently from the homeschooling group to which they belong. He’s learning to swim, play tennis etc. His education is, in my opinion far beyond that which he would receive in most schools. The dedication it requires from mostly my daughter in law but also my son is massive, basically their lives are dominated by it. My son and daughter in law took into consideration the personality of our eldest grandson and their ability to meet his educational needs before making their decision. I’m incredibly impressed with their efforts, I don’t think it is a responsibility I would have been equal to.
My younger son and his wife tried homeschooling our elder granddaughter for a time but they have less time at their disposal and my granddaughter missed school so she is now happily back in mainstream education. I think it very much depends on the personality of the child and what will best suit them alongside importantly the aptitude and willingness of the parent to take on such a huge responsibility.

I think home school is a valid option for children who really can't cope in mainstream education.

I think it's very rarely a desirable option for kids who would otherwise be able to thrive in school.

How on earth are you going to home ed a 6 year old adequately whilst looking after 2 younger children? Leave it to the professionals unless there are clear reasons why school isn’t working for him.

You have talked about how you would enjoy it.
But your priority should be your son and your other children.

So what would be the benefits to your son?
How would you ensure all 3 children get the time and attention they need?

You've not said why you think it would benefit your child.
It seems like you are considering it for selfish reasons.

I think if a child isn’t coping then it’s a valid option. I struggled to get my DD to go to school for years (ASD) and the thing she missed and she still is sad about missing is her friends and things like school shows.
I know children can go to classes and clubs but my issue with that is you are only socialising them with children like them and you’re organising it. I love it that she is now in college with loads of different friends from all over.
I know someone who homeschooled (for no particular reason apart from she wanted to keep them home). They were lovely kids, but they were like mini adults by the time they were 14 and struggled to communicate with kids their own age. Their adults and still struggle socially and they went to lots of clubs.

I had to home ed my dd out of necessity. We did this for 18 months but my daughter decided she wanted ro return to school in year 8. The primary reason for my daughter's decision was to have more social contact with her peers. She attended clubs and many home ed sessions but, for her, it didnt match up to the school experience. I think if you are an extroverted, only, child, home ed can be quite intense.

Home ed is great for tailoring a curriculum or learning to a child's individual needs and talents. We have taken the hit on that by her going back to school.

There are pros and cons for both and home ed is not all 'sunshine and rainbows' but it can be a great option for the right child.

It’s a bit like the ‘private vs state school’ debate - there is no general answer. The question is whether, at this point, home education by you in your particular circumstances is better or worse for your particular child than the school you have available to you.

It can help to work backwards. What is your plan / hope for secondary schooling? Are there considerations of eg feeder schools or selection that are relevant and a reason to be in school or not at the end of primary?

If you plan to home educate to eg 16 or 18, you do have to think about how your child will obtain the ‘entry tickets’ to the next step in education or employment and then plan backwards.

Thinking less far ahead, if you take your child out of school, what are the chances if returning him to the same or a preferred school between now and the end of primary, either because it doesn’t work out or because you or your child make a decision to re-enter school. Remember that up to the end of Y2, a class cannot be over 30, so if you leave and the space is filled, there may be no space for your child to rejoin. Even in KS2, a full and over-subscribed school may not be able to admit you, even on appeal.

Think about today. How if your child doing, academically, socially and emotionally? How will his progress in all areas be enhanced through the form of education you choose? It is perfectly valid to ‘trade’ academic progress for emotional wellbeing if your child is suffering, but if he is not, where is the benefit for him?

My DS was temporarily home schooled when the fit between him and the only accessible primary was damaging him. We moved, and he successfully re-entered school and thrived. I was glad that I had both ‘mended’ him emotionally and ensured that his academic progress aligned with schooling (took much less time, though!)

Education stays with a person for life. I find it astounding that any parent (unless they’re a qualified teacher) thinks they could home educate to an outstanding standard. Even if you could manage that to year 6 how would you manage secondary school? I also wonder about the costs involved to get all the resources needed. School isn’t just about qualifications it’s about learning to take turns, compromise, work with others you don’t like, forming relationships, working in pairs and large groups none of which can be achieved on the same scale at home. I think home education should be a last resort when a particular child can’t manage mainstream school. Food for thought- my DC has at school lessons in Latin, French, Spanish, theology, philosophy, geography, history, drama, art, computer science, DT, physics, biology, chemistry, English, music, and extensive games/PE. Do you have qualifications is all these subjects? How could you possibly replicate that at home? The only people I know who did HE taught 6 subjects only. Is your DC going to be happy and fulfilled with a smaller curriculum than most?

@Claudiasboots Is that at primary school? Sounds like secondary to
me.Or a very expensive prep post 11.

@BumpLoading I’d not take the odd bit of reluctance as a sign he’s not engaging with school. He seems happy when there and, surely, that’s great? I don’t think home ed sounds suitable for him at all as he’s not failing at school in any sense and, as others say, it’s not about you.

At 6, my DD was playing the recorder and in a recorder ensemble at school. School orchestra in y3. She had piano lessons out of school. School had all sorts of assemblies when parents attended and dc had to learn their part. Ditto at Christmas. They did all of that with school friends.

My problem with home Ed is lack of breadth and lack of social integration. You will only meet people like you and it’s narrow. Lots of home ed dc ask to go back to school and how will you cope with 3 of them at home? I think home ed has lots of limitations and for a child with school friends, it’s almost unkind. They will drop away if you home Ed.

My view - don’t do it. He doesn’t need it and being a bit grumpy about school isn’t unusual and dc have to understand some things are not optional.

Sorry I was trying to give an example of the breadth of curriculum at school. DC at secondary (just started) but when in Prep did all those subjects bar DT and Latin, but instead did dance and food tech so still very broad. OP may be in state system but would still be gearing up to educate either all through or to secondary school and would need to be able to manage or facilitate lessons in all/most of those subjects. When my older DC was in state school he still had a broad curriculum, far more than I could teach him competently.

How will you fit it around work?

Don't you have to work?

@Icanthinkformyselfthanks am I right in thinking that your daughter in law is not working outside the home? Many families have two working outside the home parents, so that would make it very difficult I’d have thought.

It must be difficult with younger children too.

My dc were home ed all the way through to university.

It is a lifestyle choice, and requires a huge amount of dedication, commitment and money. And an openness to what works and does not work for a particular child, or situation.

All the dc from our home ed group were in school by their mid-teens. My dc always had the option, but never wanted it and continued to deliver at a level where we were OK to allow them to continue at home.

This is a huge achievement. May I ask how many subjects you covered and whether you had any teaching experience yourself before you started.

Do you work OP, or might you want to return to work in future?

My DD is home educated, and has been right from the start - no nursery, no school. She is absolutely thriving, and is getting a terrific education (yes, covering a wide range of subjects). If she was at school she'd currently be in year 6, and I'm certain she wouldn't be getting the same breadth and depth of education at our local state schools.

However she is an only child. While we know lots of home educating families with multiple children, I do think the academic side of things is easier if you're only focusing on one child at a time. That said, if your DS is in year one, the amount of focused academic work you'd have to do with him to replicate what he'd learn at school is probably only a couple of hours a day.

Interestingly, teachers and lecturers are massively overrepresented when it comes to the parents of home educated children.

Definitely home education! I home educate my nearly 6 year old DD and she is thriving. We do what we want to do when we want to do it and life is great. She did attend school for reception but due to her ASD she couldn't cope.

How lovely for your son and DIL that you are so supportive of their decision to home educate!

I’d homeschool my DS as a very last resort. I am neither a qualified teacher nor a child, so he wouldn’t be learning even half the national curriculum taught by specialist teachers, nor would he be gaining social skills from interacting with his peers. We went to a church playgroup and met a lady who homeschools her five children aged 4-14, and I just cannot see how she could spend enough time teaching each child in an age-appropriate way. She described it as ‘unschooling’, and said that they ‘just learn what they want’.

I often wonder what happens when it comes to exams. I could coach my DS through the subjects I am familiar with, but he wouldn’t have a hope in hell of passing a Maths GCSE under my guidance!

We home ed. I have approached it from the perspective of enjoying the freedom in the younger years of not following a set curriculum but then making sure we do for secondary age and get private GCSEs.

@Buscobel , her ‘job’ is the homeschooling. She’s absolutely like a Ninja organisationally. I do think it requires a full time parent to dedicate themselves to it.

@Claudiasboots Well yes. My DCs totally loved drama and taking part with school friends. It meant a lot to them.

Some dc at home are not being taught much at all - definitely unschooling. My LA used to check up on these people because it’s almost abusing dc. Most see education as reaching your potential. I would see it as a job for the better off.

I did not do most of the teaching, dh did. He is a natural teacher and is fascinated by everything in the world, which he communicates in an infectious way to everyone around him, including the dc.

Dc were more scientifically inclined that either dh or I so we taught them humanities and accompanied them through their learning most of their scientific stuff (through the OU). Predictably dh studied it all alongside them (because he loved it), whereas I picked and chose what interested me (primarily stats and very applied stuff).

I also taught them/accompanied while they learned most of the practical/physical stuff, as I am more inclined to be the one upside down under a tractor or tackling the plumbing than dh, and the boys always loved to muck in with me.