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ASD child and angry head

42 replies

Catseyesgrey · 03/10/2025 13:21

Got an angry voicemail then call from depute head. My 6 year old ASD child was crawling in the classroom and not listening. He has started play therapy. They are taking quite a punitive approach seemed very angry. Ive suggested referral to OT. He gets no supports in class.

OP posts:
Octavia64 · 04/10/2025 21:27

@NorthenAdventure

play therapy is generally what is offered to children who if they were old enough would do talking therapy.

so children who have experienced violent events, medical trauma etc.

it’s unusual for a child with ASD to be doing it because it relies on an ability to explore and process emotions that is often impaired in children with ASD.

that’s not to say that it is wrong for your child though.

as they say, if you’ve met one child with ASD you’ve met one child with ASD.

pteromum · 04/10/2025 21:32

Sounds a very extreme and severe reaction (Scotland here). Is this the only school? Perhaps play based at primary two with play based therapy is just overwhelming for a wee one.

pteromum · 04/10/2025 21:37

And by what I say I mean two things.

a play based therapy may for example have suggested, crawl low if afraid. Or overwhelmed.

is this being linked back to school?

the putative approach doesn’t sit with play based learning. Have you spoken to head other than listening to a message?

Catseyesgrey · 04/10/2025 23:27

Skybluepinky · 04/10/2025 17:10

Sounds like a nightmare to have in a classroom with other children who want an education, I assume grade 2 or 3 and you couldn’t get them a ola e a SEND school this should help your case.
play therapy is usually for those with PTSD, not ASD.

He isnt a nightmare, he has very low support needs. School didn't see any ASD traits. Very discriminatory Language. Children dont actively seek an education, its play based learning so its all done on the floor except certain activities.

OP posts:
Catseyesgrey · 04/10/2025 23:32

pteromum · 04/10/2025 21:37

And by what I say I mean two things.

a play based therapy may for example have suggested, crawl low if afraid. Or overwhelmed.

is this being linked back to school?

the putative approach doesn’t sit with play based learning. Have you spoken to head other than listening to a message?

I have spoken to the Depute I asked why he was so annoyed. I asked how he was supporting him. He was really rude and I might complain.

OP posts:
Catseyesgrey · 04/10/2025 23:34

Everyone is saying play therapy is unusual. Theres not one bit of support for a child under 10 in this school so we did a third sector referral.

OP posts:
Nanamuffin · 05/10/2025 01:58

@Catseyesgrey play therapy is useful for children with ASD as it can give them tools to support social communication, play, emotional regulation etc

There are a lot of misinformed posters on this thread about play therapy.

https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC9850869/

I mean even just a quick Google of play therapy and autism gives lots of reasons why it’s good.

Pryceosh1987 · 05/10/2025 02:28

School is supposed to support children, that is what they are paid to do.

Catseyesgrey · 05/10/2025 08:39

Octavia64 · 03/10/2025 13:24

Play therapy is unusual for a child with asd.

does he have an EHCP? Is there a TA in the classroom who can offer some support?

that sort of thing is very disruptive and they will need to work out how to deal with it.

No it's Scotland doesn't exist unfortunately. Sounds like it would be good.

OP posts:
NellieElephantine · 05/10/2025 08:44

Catseyesgreen · 04/10/2025 17:07

Thank you. We have a meeting pending but all this has happened while they wait for the term to settle. Bad idea in my opinion. Still no date set. Over a year since diagnosis no meeting to discuss the report. I get they are struggling. I've asked for OT input and play therapist. I think they let him go visit his old teacher and get a movement break after I complained. He is challenging at home. Movement breaks and firm boundaries are helping. I am cutting them a break, they are not cutting me a break with annoyed voicemail. Very unprofessional. He is a wee cutie not a monster y advanced in some areas and emotionally a bit younger. His teacher last year had no problems.

Are you the op? @Catseyesgrey @Catseyesgreen ?
Have you looked at the Shannari and girfec on school website?

Soukmyfalafel · 05/10/2025 15:22

childofthe607080s · 03/10/2025 13:47

If you have budget for 30 staff and you have 6 year groups and 30 SEN pupils how exactly do you expect the school to manage ? As you would need 36 staff

there are too many children needing one on one support and the budget isn’t there

and probably not enough specially trained staff even if there was budget

all children deserve education but I would deprioritise the disruptive ones if it mean more children got educated

Er, no. You don't understand the law, just your own opinion. Schools and local authorities have a legal responsibility to provide a suitable education for ALL children, regardless of disability.

You come across like you don't understand SEND or how it works in a school setting at all. Best not to comment on these things I think.

coxesorangepippin · 05/10/2025 15:24

Is play therapy just playing??

Soukmyfalafel · 05/10/2025 15:42

Not as far as I am aware. I do intensive interaction with my son with severe ASD and it is sort of playing in a particular way to help with certain social skills and language development.

Do you still have the message OP? I would go to the head and play it to them personally and ask them what their thoughts are and if they think this is appropriate in addressing the issue. As a parent who already has struggles, the school should be more professional and understanding in dealing with the issue. I know it is just as bloody hard for teachers with a lack of resources, but offloading on to you in such a rude way isn't going to help.

ladygindiva · 05/10/2025 21:22

NorthenAdventure · 04/10/2025 21:22

Play therapy is unusual for a child with asd.

Is it? I didn't know that... I've had two professionals recommend play therapy for my autistic son?

My autistic DD has play therapy and it has benefited her hugely.

NorthenAdventure · 05/10/2025 23:58

Octavia64 · 04/10/2025 21:27

@NorthenAdventure

play therapy is generally what is offered to children who if they were old enough would do talking therapy.

so children who have experienced violent events, medical trauma etc.

it’s unusual for a child with ASD to be doing it because it relies on an ability to explore and process emotions that is often impaired in children with ASD.

that’s not to say that it is wrong for your child though.

as they say, if you’ve met one child with ASD you’ve met one child with ASD.

Hmmm... sounds like a fair few others are saying play therapy is a common recommendation for children with ASD. I'm in the education sector myself and have always though this too. Thanks though.

NorthenAdventure · 05/10/2025 23:59

Nanamuffin · 05/10/2025 01:58

@Catseyesgrey play therapy is useful for children with ASD as it can give them tools to support social communication, play, emotional regulation etc

There are a lot of misinformed posters on this thread about play therapy.

https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC9850869/

I mean even just a quick Google of play therapy and autism gives lots of reasons why it’s good.

Yes! This is what I thought too. Many thanks.

skkyelark · 06/10/2025 15:55

Also in Scotland, although not with any great in depth knowledge of the ASN system! Has he got an IEP or a co-ordinated support plan? Where are they with the staged intervention framework, although the exact details of that vary by council?

Have you been able to get the details of what happened? What was he supposed to be doing when he was crawling around? What does his teacher say? Crawling around when they're all accessing different activities freely is different from doing it when they're all sat on the carpet for a phonics lesson. Doing it when there's a fire drill is different again.

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