If you've finished schooling for your children, would you do anything differently now?

[AlpineMuesli]

Just curious what advice hindsight offers.

Same here!

DS and DD went to local state primary and comp. Early on we encouraged them both to think of what they wanted to do for a career/job and this was one of the best things I think that we did as parents. We absolutely facilitated this for both of them and did everything we could to encourage them and to help make it happen (think after school clubs, volunteering, work experience, private tutors etc.) Really helped them focus and they both then worked towards being able to achieve what they needed to at secondary school (and beyond) in order to get the career they wanted. Have to also say that both were average students and not scholars at all. DS did apprenticeship DD went to uni. Both happy and successful careers now.

I would have done more and questioned the school more when my son was doing his GCSEs. He did fine in his mocks but terrible in his actual exams. I wished I'd been more on top of it.

Be flexible and pay attention to each child and follow your gut instinct.

My two eldest got scholarships to private secondary school - the eldest loved it made lifelong friends and a husband and the younger one hated it and had no friends (very small year group) - mainly I think due to the cohort and jealousy rather than the school. She left and went elsewhere at sixth form - was a hard decision but ultimately her choice and she was much happier and got brilliant A levels grades.

Same with the younger two - they went to the same excellent state secondary (we moved house to live in the catchment) and one loved it and had a large strong friendship group and the other couldn't wait to leave and had all sorts of problems with other children bullying and ostracising her etc even into 6th form.

Also, one child was just not ready for formal schooling until she was in year 7 - it caused us huge issues and made her completely miserable (I had a thread about it years ago on here as was at my wits end!) I wish I had home schooled or could have afforded to send her to an alternative school. She is now very happy doing a BA at a conservatoire so she got there in the end and has I think forgiven me! 😂

I think educationally my dc did well at a bilingual school from nursery to S6 (Scotland) but I'm not sure the pastoral care was as good as it might have been.

They've all left school now and doing well so I'm pretty sure we did the right thing. Dd1 in particular uses her Gaelic often.

Jesus, just ignore the thread if you find it too complicated to think about. There are millions of other people out there who can respond.

We would have not sent DS1 to a grammar school, kept him at his prep and sent him to an independent secondary at 13. My younger two go to indies and the education has been so much better in every possible way.

Hi, was reading through some of the comments, I found your comment @lightsandtunnels very interesting as we are trying to do the same for my DS. May I know what careers your children are in now? At what age did you start to engage them on their career choices?

I’d be more vocal about calling out teachers in the wrong, and poor practices. I look back at one occasion in particular where the school accidentally locked my 6yo out in the playground all afternoon and didn’t realise due to not doing afternoon registration properly. Class teacher then didn’t tell me, I heard it piecemeal from my DC. I approached the teacher who apologised and that was it. I still feel rage about it from the safety perspective years later and honestly wish I’d raised hell on hindsight. Same school insisted on phonics only, leading to DC being unable to spell properly by secondary. Again, I regret not being more vocal and challenging the school’s practices.

^^ This was a ‘good’ rated state primary I would add.

I’d send them to a fun, creative, nurturing, less driven state primary school and similarly themed fee paying secondary. They are bright kids but needed an enriching, more interestingly creative environment with a warmer kinder ethos.

i wish they had been exposed to a much wider curriculum then the limited U.K. curriculum. Forest schools also, a hands on experiences with science and learning crafts, less competitive sports.