My kids don’t /won’t read

[Bobsledgirl]

13 and 16. Apart from the bare minimum for school they just don’t read. They had books as little children and I read to them but even with lots of encouragement from me, they have zero interest in books. They can of course spend hours on phones and x boxes.

How can I change this? Do I need to?

I've always done reading before sleep, so now my 10 and almost 13 year old read every night in bed (no screens allowed in bedrooms) it's a habit but means they both love books. Older one is a more avid reader and will read at other times too.

Thanks for the replies

limit screen time will help boost reading considerably

My Y5 child has a reading score equivalent to Y9 - Y12 (the school runs the reading test every few months and the scores fluctuate a bit, but always several years ahead of their actual age）. What we did was to limit screen time and reading becomes a form of entertainment. It helps other subjects too, because of reading speed and ability to digest information effectively.

Do they have periods throughout the day/week when screens are not allowed? The draw towards a smartphone can often override any desire to do anything more "analogue"...

I wonder if graphic novels might be of interest?

You can’t force them, but you can limit screen time. What do you currently have in place?

English Lit A Level put me off reading forever more.

Give me something technical, though, and I'll read that quite happily, as it serves a purpose.

Both I and my partner have that but still read for pleasure. I'm a total bookworm but no pictures going on.

Some people just don't really gel with fiction though and that's okay.

Limit screen time/take the phones and devices away after a set time. Don't allow them in bedrooms. They will soon pick up a book. Tech kills creativity

Despite the fact that I have been a keen reader since the age of about three (I'll read the back of a cornflake packet if there's nothing else available), I have ended up with 3DCs who are totally uninterested in books. I have no idea how that happened. They CAN read, obviously, and have been fine academically, but just have never been interested in recreational reading.

Drives me nuts.....I'll send DD1 an article about something I know she's interested in, but she can't be bothered to spend five minutes reading it. DS is proud to tell me he's never actually finished a book.

Although, having said that, DD2 (who is 20) has fallen in with a group at university who do tend to read and pass books around the group, and she has recently started reading a bit more seriously. Actual novels!

I don't think you can change it. They either enjoy books, or they don't. And it's clearly not hereditary!

And I don't think I can blame it on tech. My oldest is 24, so of the generation when he didn't have a phone until he was 12, and his lack of interest in books was evident from the earliest years.

I have one who is a voracious reader, first in school year to reach a million words read since Sept.
The other literally won't read a word.
No idea what to do. Screen time removal doesn't help as they'd rather do ANYTHING (play out, draw, play cards) than read.
Unsurprisingly, the reader can spell and the non reader cannot.
I'm a reader but their dad isn't.

Not everyone likes reading as a hobby. Just like not everyone likes sport, or needlecraft. So long as the options are there and they're on track at school, leave them to it.

Mine don't really either (age 12 & 9), they do what they need to for school and doing well meeting above expected targets so I'm not concerned from that side, i do think they're missing out though because I'm always reading something and was a massive bookworm as a child too! DH doesn't read much for pleasure. I'm hoping they get into it when they're a bit older and reading doesn't feel like a school chore!

I think friends definitely make a difference @CointreauVersial , DD1 has bookish friends and they all swap books and sit and read together at school. DD2 reads and is beginning to influence her friends, she was saying one of them has now discovered booktok so is asking DD2 about where to get books more cheaply!

@BlackSwanEvent I think with the OP's kids being teenagers it's hard to restrict phone access. I'm clearly unusual as a parent because we have a house rule of no phones in the bedrooms overnight which applies to everyone in the house and both DDs (14&16) have told me they've got up in the morning more than once to thousands of messages on whatsapp groups. I actually mentioned that we did that at work and my colleagues in their 30s were shocked I didn't have my phone in the bedroom. My 11 yo has more restrictions on tech use but he's younger so he's less dependent on it for his social life.

Love how everyone says restrict tech like that's a guarantee they'll read instead.
My DC didn't have a TV in their bedroom. Weren't allowed phones/handheld consoles in there. Hardly had any toys in their.
One of them still doesn't read. He'd do maths for fun instead.

@BlueFairyBugsBooks I think even adults who like reading read less because of having phones. I certainly do. And when I restrict tech my kids (who all like reading) tend to choose to read. So for readers restricting tech works. But agree, some kids will do other things instead.

What’s wrong with that? You can’t force reading but you can create the conditions for positive screen-free activities.

There's nothing wrong with it.

But the answer to "how do i make my kids read more" isn't necessarily "limit screen time". If it was my son would have been a reader.

OP my boys have never read much for pleasure (age 19 and 17). They both enjoyed us reading to them when they were younger, and both got grade 9 Eng Lit/Lang at GCSE so I'm not concerned for them, just feel like they're missing out a little. For context, my DH reads a lot, and very visibly around the house for relaxation. I read at bedtime, and encourage my boys to buy me books for Xmas - they enjoy choosing them for me.

Unfortunately, I do think they have always felt "nagged" to read, mostly by their schools, but occasionally by me when the school has nagged parents about it. I don't think that has helped, but it's hard to say whether it has hindered.

It’s not the only way.
Novels in their current form have only been around a few hundred years and there are films and tv dramas now too to develop empathy.
Ds1 doesn’t read for pleasure but he is amazingly well informed which comes entirely from watching YouTube videos.
Not everyone has to be the same.

No, you don't need to. As long as they CAN read and have associated skills it's fine. Not everyone has the attention to focus on reading, some prefer to be active, some just don't enjoy it. There's a lot of snobbery around 'reading'. Both my kids read constantly until about 8 or 9 then weren't interested. Both are really driven, bright adults who run businesses. They just rarely read books.

I'm an avid reader, only dd1 of my lot reads for pleasure. Ds tells anyone who asks the last book he read was the Twits, he's 35 has a degree and a Masters. He didn't even read the set texts for English Lit GCSEs he watched productions and read sample essays online instead. I spent hours reading to them all and they had access to lots of books but nothing made them like reading.

I know someone in their eighties who has never read a novel, but has read a newspaper every day of his adult life. He's very well informed.

If he was growing up now, he would probably read his news online, but it would still be reading.

Ds stopped reading between 11-15, he finished The Hunger Games and then there just seemed to be a big gap for books for that age group. He read Top Gear magazines instead. Now he reads non stop and prefers books to TV. Hos dream is to have a house big enough to have a library.